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Thread: Your most ultimatest country, evah!!!

  1. #1
    Bopa Member Incongruous's Avatar
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    Default Your most ultimatest country, evah!!!

    I'm bored (have some essays due, you guys get it) and have decided that it would ultimately awsome if we all created the most awsomest countries evah. I mean like, you can have whatever, speak whatever and export/import whatever, like imaginary land for people who play Total War!

    My most ultimatest country would be:

    New Zooland!

    Even better than Old Zooland!

    We would be the Zoolanders, a race so in tune with nature, we make out with trees, 4 real.
    The language is whatever we can make of it, no one has ever written a dictionary, in fact no one has ever written! We believe in the Great White Goat, who digested into existance the world we now live in.

    Our capital city is a small alternative camper-van park in the middle of the Pixie forest, where Tree Zebras swing atop the canopy of coffee trees and the monkey cats paint nice little finger portraits of themselves.

    Our main export is the Ready Made Zoo and it keeps the economy going, every tuesday we all do a bit of work or whatever, before going back into a lazy trance.

    Our main import is the camper-van.

    Tree chopping of any kind is forbidden, because trees here have vocal cords and anything which can scream like that has automatic Human Rights.

    We have been in 56 different wars, and lost every one.

    Hmm, I've lost that train of thought for now.

    But you guys should all join in! I don't wanna be lonely...

    Sig by Durango

    Now that the House of Commons is trying to become useful, it does a great deal of harm.
    -Oscar Wilde

  2. #2
    Poll Smoker Senior Member CountArach's Avatar
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    Default Re: Your most ultimatest country, evah!!!

    Texas
    Rest in Peace TosaInu, the Org will be your legacy
    Quote Originally Posted by Leon Blum - For All Mankind
    Nothing established by violence and maintained by force, nothing that degrades humanity and is based on contempt for human personality, can endure.

  3. #3
    Devout worshipper of Bilious Member miotas's Avatar
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    Default Re: Your most ultimatest country, evah!!!

    There are vast plains to the north were sugar can is grown for the manufature of rum.

    The primary mode of transport is the flying pig.

    The currency is a good firm handshake.

    All disputes are solved by cricket.

    All the past 56 wars were over rum and lasted only until the next shipment arrived.

    There are also many other names this great country goes by, one of them being Strayla.

    - Four Horsemen of the Presence

  4. #4
    Ranting madman of the .org Senior Member Fly Shoot Champion, Helicopter Champion, Pedestrian Killer Champion, Sharpshooter Champion, NFS Underground Champion Rhyfelwyr's Avatar
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    Default Re: Your most ultimatest country, evah!!!

    Scotland the Brave!
    At the end of the day politics is just trash compared to the Gospel.

  5. #5
    Incorruptible Forest Manager Member Tristuskhan's Avatar
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    Default Re: Your most ultimatest country, evah!!!

    Euzkadi!
    "Les Cons ça ose tout, c'est même à ça qu'on les reconnait"

    Kentoc'h Mervel Eget Bezañ Saotret - Death feels better than stain, motto of the Breton People. Emgann!

  6. #6
    the G-Diffuser Senior Member pevergreen's Avatar
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    Default Re: Your most ultimatest country, evah!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by CountArach View Post
    Texas
    Import Texas into Australia and rename it Texas.
    Quote Originally Posted by TosaInu
    The org will be org until everyone calls it a day.

    Quote Originally Posted by KukriKhan View Post
    but I joke. Some of my best friends are Vietnamese villages.
    Quote Originally Posted by Lemur
    Anyone who wishes to refer to me as peverlemur is free to do so.

  7. #7
    Clan Clan InsaneApache's Avatar
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    Default Re: Your most ultimatest country, evah!!!

    There are times I wish they’d just ban everything- baccy and beer, burgers and bangers, and all the rest- once and for all. Instead, they creep forward one apparently tiny step at a time. It’s like being executed with a bacon slicer.

    “Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it whether it exists or not, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedy.”

    To learn who rules over you, simply find out who you are not allowed to criticise.

    "The purpose of a university education for Left / Liberals is to attain all the politically correct attitudes towards minorties, and the financial means to live as far away from them as possible."

  8. #8
    Stranger in a strange land Moderator Hooahguy's Avatar
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    Default Re: Your most ultimatest country, evah!!!

    texas
    On the Path to the Streets of Gold: a Suebi AAR
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    Hvil i fred HoreTore

  9. #9
    Old Town Road Senior Member Strike For The South's Avatar
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    Default Re: Your most ultimatest country, evah!!!

    Texas
    There, but for the grace of God, goes John Bradford

    My aim, then, was to whip the rebels, to humble their pride, to follow them to their inmost recesses, and make them fear and dread us. Fear is the beginning of wisdom.

    I am tired and sick of war. Its glory is all moonshine. It is only those who have neither fired a shot nor heard the shrieks and groans of the wounded who cry aloud for blood, for vengeance, for desolation.

  10. #10
    Clan Clan InsaneApache's Avatar
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    Default Re: Your most ultimatest country, evah!!!

    Aye, well they say that Texas is just the USA version of Yorkshire.
    There are times I wish they’d just ban everything- baccy and beer, burgers and bangers, and all the rest- once and for all. Instead, they creep forward one apparently tiny step at a time. It’s like being executed with a bacon slicer.

    “Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it whether it exists or not, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedy.”

    To learn who rules over you, simply find out who you are not allowed to criticise.

    "The purpose of a university education for Left / Liberals is to attain all the politically correct attitudes towards minorties, and the financial means to live as far away from them as possible."

  11. #11
    Ice stink there for a ham. Member Mystery Science Torture 3000 Champion, Mini Putt 3 Champion, Super Hacky Sack Champion, Pencak Champion, Sperm Wars Champion, Monkey Diving Champion Yoyoma1910's Avatar
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    Default Re: Your most ultimatest country, evah!!!

    They also say there are only two things that come out of Texas...

    My kingdom for a .

  12. #12
    Honorary Argentinian Senior Member Gyroball Champion, Karts Champion Caius's Avatar
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    Default Re: Your most ultimatest country, evah!!!

    United States of Europe FTW.




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  13. #13
    Slixpoitation Member A Very Super Market's Avatar
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    Default Re: Your most ultimatest country, evah!!!

    Burkina Faso, for their sheer gall in naming their capital Ouagadougou.
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  14. #14
    Clan Clan InsaneApache's Avatar
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    Default Re: Your most ultimatest country, evah!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by A Very Super Market View Post
    Burkina Faso, for their sheer gall in naming their capital Ouagadougou.
    A cigar here please.
    There are times I wish they’d just ban everything- baccy and beer, burgers and bangers, and all the rest- once and for all. Instead, they creep forward one apparently tiny step at a time. It’s like being executed with a bacon slicer.

    “Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it whether it exists or not, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedy.”

    To learn who rules over you, simply find out who you are not allowed to criticise.

    "The purpose of a university education for Left / Liberals is to attain all the politically correct attitudes towards minorties, and the financial means to live as far away from them as possible."

  15. #15
    Nobody expects the Senior Member Lemur's Avatar
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    Default Re: Your most ultimatest country, evah!!!

    Hail, hail Freedonia, land of the brave and free!

    'Cause seriously, who wouldn't want Groucho Marx for President?
    "Those are my principles, and if you don't like them ... well, I have others." — Groucho Marx

  16. #16
    Tree Killer Senior Member Beirut's Avatar
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    Default Re: Your most ultimatest country, evah!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Default the Magyar View Post
    Tree chopping of any kind is forbidden, because trees here have vocal cords and anything which can scream like that has automatic Human Rights.
    In about an hour you better get some ear plugs.
    Unto each good man a good dog

  17. #17
    Horse Archer Senior Member Sarmatian's Avatar
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    Default Re: Your most ultimatest country, evah!!!

    No need to create it, it already exists.

    Brazil - everyone's just cool and hangs out on the beach and girls play beach volley in skimpy bikinis...

  18. #18
    Old Town Road Senior Member Strike For The South's Avatar
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    Default Re: Your most ultimatest country, evah!!!

    Texas is bigger than France
    There, but for the grace of God, goes John Bradford

    My aim, then, was to whip the rebels, to humble their pride, to follow them to their inmost recesses, and make them fear and dread us. Fear is the beginning of wisdom.

    I am tired and sick of war. Its glory is all moonshine. It is only those who have neither fired a shot nor heard the shrieks and groans of the wounded who cry aloud for blood, for vengeance, for desolation.

  19. #19
    Member Centurion1's Avatar
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    Default Re: Your most ultimatest country, evah!!!

    Lone Star State baby (everyone else is doing it so why don't i join in)

  20. #20
    Near East TW Mod Leader Member Cute Wolf's Avatar
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    Default Re: Your most ultimatest country, evah!!!

    Well, the best Hypothetical country ever is

    1) A Khanate of the Christian Mongols in M2TW Kingdoms (Khanate of Jerusalem?!?)
    ---> A mix of Templar and Mongol forces.... They have the deadliest cavalry ever, with excellent heavy infantrymen too...

    2) Crossbred of Hellen and Romans in EB... (Pretend Pyrrhos really trash Roma, and instead of dissloving it, he crown himself into Basileus of Roma...) --> A phalanx army who can throw pila....

    LOL

    My Projects : * Near East Total War * Nusantara Total War * Assyria Total War *
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    Also known as SPIKE in TWC

  21. #21
    Ranting madman of the .org Senior Member Fly Shoot Champion, Helicopter Champion, Pedestrian Killer Champion, Sharpshooter Champion, NFS Underground Champion Rhyfelwyr's Avatar
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    Default Re: Your most ultimatest country, evah!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Cute Wolf View Post
    A phalanx army who can throw pila....
    That would be the most terrifying force in history.

    Unless there are elephants with catapults on their backs...
    At the end of the day politics is just trash compared to the Gospel.

  22. #22
    Near East TW Mod Leader Member Cute Wolf's Avatar
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    Default Re: Your most ultimatest country, evah!!!

    Catapults? who need catapults if you can use ballistic rockets in their back instead... (Rocket Elephants in M2TW)...... Oh... and those Yubtseb Mammoth in vanilla RTW... they can use ICBM

    My Projects : * Near East Total War * Nusantara Total War * Assyria Total War *
    * Watch the mind-blowing game : My Little Ponies : The Mafia Game!!! *

    Also known as SPIKE in TWC

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