Quote Originally Posted by Scienter View Post
Feminists don't all agree on the work/life balance debate. Some feminists feel that feminism is about choice, and others think that women who stay home are harming all women. I believe that it's about choice, or at least that I need to respect others' choices, so you know where I'm coming from here.
That's fine, I can respect that point of view.

If a woman chooses to stay home and raise children, more power to her! But, not all women want to stay at home and raise children, and it's just as insulting to tell women who want careers that they should be home as it is to tell a stay at home mom to get back to work. Some women who stay home don't actually want to be there. They can't afford day care, or they stay home because it's what's expected of them. There are women who work because they have to, and would rather stay home with their kids. Regardless, the notion that the "traditional" role of woman as homemaker needs to fade into obscurity. Telling women that they, in general, belong in the home is harmful to women and to society, unless you believe that women have nothing to offer society but free childcare and maid service.
I didn't say that at all. You're over-reacting (sadly, predictably). I said that women should not be made to feel that they are required to have a family and a career. Your objection to the "traditional" role of a woman devalues the raising of a family. My own mother would tell you that raising two children of her own was harder and more demanding than working as an accountant or a primary school teacher.

I've never said that women have to work and raise children alone. But, for women who want to work and have a family (like men!), feminism stands for the idea that they should be able to do this, and that this should be an acceptable choice in society.
"Have a family" is a conveniently bland statement. Men make fathers, women make mothers; that's basic biology. Only women can concieve, carry, birth, and feed an infant. Anecdotally, women wake when their babies cry, men don't. It's also been shown scientifically that when women hold babies their brains release a hormone that creates a sense of "bliss", the same hormone is released when breastfeeding. These things don't happen to men.

Society and my country's laws should not force women into traditional gender roles. Personally I don't believe women are any more inherently able to parent than men just because we can get pregnant.
I dissagree vehemently. I have never found a "mother" figure in a man, or a "father" figure in a woman. Men should obviously be involved in the raising of their children, but shoehorning them into the maternal role seems unfair, and doesn't play to most men's strengths in my opinion.

Since I don't believe in traditional roles, I expect my partner to do his share in raising a child. We both work, we both actively parent. I believe dual working families who actively share parenting responsibility are happier and more economically secure.
I believe most three year olds would rather run to "mummy" when they cut their knee than "daddy" or "nanny".

It's not just an issue of work/life balance. The rights of single mothers, abused mothers and children, pregnant women, pregnant women and mothers in prison, and same sex couples who wish to be parents are all feminist issues related to motherhood. Some feminists may rail against the stay at home mom, but I think both choices acceptable. Feminism is about choices, and the context in which those choices are made. It's about women being as free to choose their roles as men are.
All of which is covered under egalitarianism. Except this; you seem to think women should be able to choose to be like men. That simply isn't possible on a lot of levels, and it begs the question of why on Earth you would want to in the first place.

I am reminded of The Life of Brian and a man demanding the right to have a baby.

A woman should be paid the same as a man if they work the same hours and do the same quality work. End of story. Otherwise, it's discrimination and should be illegal. I'm not comparing someone who has been absent in from the work place to someone who has not. A person who takes two years off can't expect to pick up right where they left off. But, if a woman has a child, and returns to work full time, she should not be paid less than a man for doing the same amount of work. Nor should women without children be paid less than their male counterparts.
You've skipped over my point. Legally, women who work the same job for the same number of years are due all the benefits of men. However, in many cases if you take maternity leave you fall behind in the payscale because you weren't working when the men were.

I can't think of a recent instance of a woman without children being paid less than a man; for all the rhetoric. Such a case would have made the national news and yet no femenist in Britain has ever produced an example.