Well it's largely dependent on level, very little appears to be scaled in the game. Waltzing through Scorpion Gulch or assaulting Cottonwood Cove as soon a you start a game would be tantamount to suicide, and attacking places like the Brotherhood bunker and the Fort is always going to be hard even at level 30, but for the most part I agree with you, which is why I downloaded mods for the game.

One thing I like about this game is how you are very rarely forced to kill anything, there's almost always a non-violent resolution to every situation if you posses the right skills. I might try do a playthough where I don't take a single life.