I hope we can get medieval legal system... as I can get a duel and kill someone...

[Cute Wolf]

Please help me... well, I want to kill someone...

What will you do with a man that CHASE OFF YOUR GIRL? seriously... I have a girlfriend... but then, since a month ago, another man appears (he was her workmate), and start flirting out with her... obviously... start sending flowers, chocolates, and even regularly call her to check where is she...

for a little background, I was still studying my magistrate degree in another province, and she was allready working (and she was older than me little more than one year).

We have a long distance relationship, but I often going visit my hometown, and everything goes fine, until that filthy man appears!!! Apparently, all was started when that man start to love my girl... (they are workmate btw), and it looks like that she was at first avoiding him... but he was "working really hard to get her" and she was apparently start to give him some replies...

When last week I going back to my hometown after hearing about that (from my other friend!) I start to investigate about him, and this matter, he was 5 year older than me, and he was her senior (my girl just get a job).

And as you can expect, I try to speak with him... but what response did I get was really a hostile one, first, as I didn't know about him, I try to introduce myself. But when I joke arround and say that "she was my girlfriend" he start to going hostile with me, and when I ask about why he chase my girl...

HE SAY THAT I DIDN'T MARRY HER YET AND HE WAS FREE TO TRY WIN HER HEART! WHAT THE
(actually more talk is involved... but you know.... )

Oh... .... and he start to prepare to ready for a fight... (yes, a real fight in front of the office)...
And I say that I didn't want to get any trouble, and start to walk out of the trouble... he grab my collar, and try to hit my head, but I dodged before he hit me, I grab his neck and slam his head against the wall.... (I'm quite used for brawling when in Junior high, and I still had some reflex)

Luckily, before the fight was escalated... the securities start to hold us, and told both of us to leave...


And now, my brain was boiled.... he really want to get a trouble with me... but on the other hand, getting a fight in this "modern" wolrd, can result in big trouble.... as if I was lucky, maybe I can just walk out after that fight, but if unlucky enough, I can end up in a police station.....

So I try to douse my boiling brain, here, when I back to bandung again, with playing M2TW... but looking at those shiny knights made me remember about medieval ethics, that if you got some problem on your head, a combat will give you a really fine place to relase your anger.... and it just get worse.... I then open EB and still remember about it.... AAARRRGGGHHHHH

I then ask a friend and he says that I should douse that with beer... and forget that girl.... damn...
I ask another, and he said that I should get the answer in the Bible...

Well, I need your advice about my problem... what should I do....

[Philippus Flavius Homovallumus]

What does your girlfriend think. Isn't that what matters?

[The Stranger]

make your girl like you more than him...

[CrossLOPER]

So some guy from your girlfriend's workplace is hitting on your girlfriend? Not much you can do here. I would talk to your girlfriend about this. Try not to feel threatened and don't get into anymore fights with him.

[Subotan]

Impress her by injuring another human being, preferably one she cares about.

[Louis VI the Fat]

If you can handle him, beat the crap out of him.

[Rhyfelwyr]

Do your almost impossible mapping of the west Indonesian islands and get mad at the CTD's instead?

[Ser Clegane]

What does your girlfriend think. Isn't that what matters?

Exactly - this is a matter you need to resolve with your girlfriend and not with your "rival". Ultimately the decision is hers and getting in fights is unlikely to be of any help - apart from blowing off steam if she decides against you, and then you will rather look like a fool (unless of course she is the type who prefers to be won caveman-style, which I somehow doubt).

and he was her senior (my girl just get a job).

This one struck me - do you mean "senior" as in having higher tenure or as in being her direct supervisor? If it is the latter, I wonder what the employer thinks about a senior hitting on a new hire (not appreciated at all workplaces). If he is her supervisor it might also be the case that she was getting more responsive to avoid trouble with her supervisor.
But again - if you care about her talk to her - the only reason to bother about the guy would be if she decides that she would like to keep her relationship with you, makes that clear to him and he still pursues her against her explicit will.

[Fragony]

Screw that this is a case of male pride. Prank him.

[Beskar]

Don't get jealous or start snooping around your girlfriend. It will make her run into his arms.

[Philippus Flavius Homovallumus]

If you can handle him, beat the crap out of him.

But check she doesn't like him first.

[Pannonian]

Exactly - this is a matter you need to resolve with your girlfriend and not with your "rival". Ultimately the decision is hers and getting in fights is unlikely to be of any help - apart from blowing off steam if she decides against you, and then you will rather look like a fool (unless of course she is the type who prefers to be won caveman-style, which I somehow doubt).


This one struck me - do you mean "senior" as in having higher tenure or as in being her direct supervisor? If it is the latter, I wonder what the employer thinks about a senior hitting on a new hire (not appreciated at all workplaces). If he is her supervisor it might also be the case that she was getting more responsive to avoid trouble with her supervisor.
But again - if you care about her talk to her - the only reason to bother about the guy would be if she decides that she would like to keep her relationship with you, makes that clear to him and he still pursues her against her explicit will.

Hang on, isn't it the right thing to do, to drive off any males that venture on to the beach, so you can monopolise access to the females on your patch? It may be trickier if the other male is a more dominant silverback, but if you cultivate your social circles well and meticulously groom your peers, you may be able to form alliances to bring down even the most tyrannical alpha male. Of course, the next problem is to make sure you're the leader of that winning group and not a subordinate, but random acts of violence should cow the others, while combing through their hair for fleas will soothe them.

[Louis VI the Fat]

But check she doesn't like him first.

I'd say that would be all the more reason. If she likes him better, Cute Mad Wolf will have sabotaged their relationship forever.


YOU ARE ALL GIRLIE EUNUCH MEN

[Philippus Flavius Homovallumus]

I'd say that would be all the more reason. If she likes him better, Cute Mad Wolf will have sabotaged their relationship forever.


YOU ARE ALL GIRLIE EUNUCH MEN

Nonsense, I will strike with unremitting fury if my lady is offended, but I'm not going to crash headlong into a fight just because I'm offended, that would not be chivalrous.

[Samurai Waki]

Where's your sense of honor and chivalry?!?! Don't let some guy get away with hitting on your woman, take him to a quiet field and duel to the death with pistols. Or, you could go the mafia way, have your buddies hold him down while you threaten his dangly bits with a sharp rusty object of some kind. If you decide to go the mafia way, just make sure you sound and act really cold and calculating.

[Pannonian]

Where's your sense of honor and chivalry?!?! Don't let some guy get away with hitting on your woman, take him to a quiet field and duel to the death with pistols. Or, you could go the mafia way, have your buddies hold him down while you threaten his dangly bits with a sharp rusty object of some kind. If you decide to go the mafia way, just make sure you sound and act really cold and calculating.

You've got it wrong. Doing it the Mafia way is to seat him in a room with a dozen other people, and vote to have him executed. Or wait and hope that he's killed during the night.

[The Stranger]

no no no.

first you strip him down to his bare naked 2 inch ****, tie him down, then you have a goat lick his feet, pour honey into ******* and release the ants, laugh while he squirms, wait five minutes until the potatoes are cooked, pour the dressing over him, add the onions and enjoy your roasted chicken.

[The Wizard]

If this was the Middle Ages, you'd kill her

Not any advice to take, obviously

[Seamus Fermanagh]

To quote Tom Stoppard, "Exclusive rights isn't love, it's colonization."

She will stay with you because she wishes to do so or she will not. Same holds for you. Only if both of you choose to stay in the relationship will it flourish.

[Centurion1]

I'd say that would be all the more reason. If she likes him better, Cute Mad Wolf will have sabotaged their relationship forever.


YOU ARE ALL GIRLIE EUNUCH MEN

lol silly frenchmen fightings for barbarians not civilized men like you.


And he is totally wrong aobut the marrying thing. So marry your foot to his *** **** so he understands the concept.

[Mooks]

Iv gone after someone elses girlfriend before, hes right in the marrying thing. Only way he could be wrong is if you can beat him in a fight.

ManLaws > medieval legal system

[Centurion1]

ManLaws > medieval legal system

manlaws as everyone here knows states that a man is not to interfere with anothers man woman as long as he does not give you express permission. furthermore according to article three clause four if a woman breaks up with a man there is a certain time wait before you can make her your own out of decencies sake. If the man breaks up with here its open game.

and if you care to disagree i will throw down the gauntlet sah and god shall tell us who is right!

[Cute Wolf]

Exactly - this is a matter you need to resolve with your girlfriend and not with your "rival". Ultimately the decision is hers and getting in fights is unlikely to be of any help - apart from blowing off steam if she decides against you, and then you will rather look like a fool (unless of course she is the type who prefers to be won caveman-style, which I somehow doubt).


This one struck me - do you mean "senior" as in having higher tenure or as in being her direct supervisor? If it is the latter, I wonder what the employer thinks about a senior hitting on a new hire (not appreciated at all workplaces). If he is her supervisor it might also be the case that she was getting more responsive to avoid trouble with her supervisor.
But again - if you care about her talk to her - the only reason to bother about the guy would be if she decides that she would like to keep her relationship with you, makes that clear to him and he still pursues her against her explicit will.

Thanks ser... and everyone who suggest that I should try to solve the problem with my girl first... unfortunely, that filthy man was her supervisor...
She initially said that he was annoying, but she can't just avoid him, without fear of getting fired...

It was really every odd against me now as Ser Cleagne allready pointed out, I didn't even understand why such man can get a hit on a new hire... But for the worst part, from my friend's information I've got, he was usually a serious and good man... It was the first time he showing off to care about a girl!!! and WTF he told to all his workmate that he was really serious and want to marry her... OMG!!!

Yeah... all odds against me... a serious, mature, and well positioned man hitting on a new hire is not entirely unapreciated.... if he was usually a serious man, and only this time show the attitude.... that's why I fear that he was really fall in love with her, and that was really made me boil... yeah, she was responsive a bit because his seniority factor... but what could say about "repeated incursions?"...

Hang on, isn't it the right thing to do, to drive off any males that venture on to the beach, so you can monopolise access to the females on your patch? It may be trickier if the other male is a more dominant silverback, but if you cultivate your social circles well and meticulously groom your peers, you may be able to form alliances to bring down even the most tyrannical alpha male. Of course, the next problem is to make sure you're the leader of that winning group and not a subordinate, but random acts of violence should cow the others, while combing through their hair for fleas will soothe them.

It's the problem... my hometown wasn't my actual habitat now... and I only had some schoolmates that worked here... yes, that was some of my cousins and pals I can rely on... but as far as social thingies are considered... It was a problem... big problem because my filthy enemy had more friends.... and he allready have acess to work position....

Thinking about a choice you made either to get some work and socially stable position, but lower expectations in long time planning... or accept the scholarship offers, and try your best to deepened the education because you want to be a science researcher...... I choose the latter because I get the offer to become a researcher-lecturer on my univ, and allready get a promotion for doctorate degree on Netherlands when I finish the magistrate degree.... but then, what can you think when you are going overseas, and your girl was snatched away under your nose...

Where's your sense of honor and chivalry?!?! Don't let some guy get away with hitting on your woman, take him to a quiet field and duel to the death with pistols. Or, you could go the mafia way, have your buddies hold him down while you threaten his dangly bits with a sharp rusty object of some kind. If you decide to go the mafia way, just make sure you sound and act really cold and calculating.

If this was the Middle Ages, you'd kill her

Not any advice to take, obviously

That's why I made refrences to the good ol way of medieval customs.... apparently, the duel abolishers never got a problem with their relationships... I was quite stressed by the fact that until 300 years ago, honorary duels are still mostly legal ways in allmost all the wolrd, and every nations or cultures had their own forms, no matter that was europeans and japanese (duels!); muslims (honor killings!); chineese, javanese, and malayans (permissable kill!), and every cultures had their own ways to solve the matter of hatred with a killing, including a socially "not a crime" stigma on duels.... too bad, some effaminate philloshopers and law makers never think to get an emphaty on behalf of the voilated men... so they made every killing a crime , including a self defence could lead you into the jail...

To quote Tom Stoppard, "Exclusive rights isn't love, it's colonization."

She will stay with you because she wishes to do so or she will not. Same holds for you. Only if both of you choose to stay in the relationship will it flourish.

Yeah... but I can't simply said her to leave her job...
too bad, she decides to not get a higher education after finishing her diploma degree... and now, she was expected to work, because she was lived only with her mother... (she doesn't have any siblings, and her fathers are passed away long time ago). Talking about 22 years old girl, putting a well positioned man in his 26, with serious attitude, steady income, and position of his own (even when his income and position are actually at lower moderate)... that offers a serious marriage proposal... against a barely 21 years old "boy"... no matter how high is his acedemic archievements and study related researches... that boy (me) is still looks like a small child when he going home after a day full of lectures and research, spent hours playing games and reading comics.... and for worse, about one and half year from now, he was expected to go overseas... furthering his study on doctorate degree... with research time that no one will know until it was done (talking about organomatallic catalyst research I worked here...)... if she thinks more about the wellness of her family on short terms... the choice... is obvious....

That was why I want to grab a rapier (or samurai, or some kind of blades) and challange him to a duel...

Iv gone after someone elses girlfriend before, hes right in the marrying thing. Only way he could be wrong is if you can beat him in a fight.

ManLaws > medieval legal system

I was quite confident that even when that fight last week was actually my first fight after finishing highschool (!), I was still capable to beat the crap out of him...
but quite unlike highschool brawls that the police was barely notice, and only said that was only some unharmful naughty acts... and was looked away with laughs... 21 years against 26 years employee wil be considered a crime. Even when I just slam his head to the wall that time, my friends advise me (afterwards) that he could ended up reporting me to the police, no matter he was the one who start the fight first, because he didn't hit me (or can't, talking about a dodge when he try to hit me), and as the result he was the one who are injured... (it was just a minor bruise)... Thanks God... he didn't do that... (looks like he has some pride to not be called coward), but if we doing a full scale fight... maybe his family will report me.... bah...

At least I've know that I doing something... but did anyone have a "gentler" suggestion for me (put aside beating the crap out of him or kill him), that I should do? did you have some "diplomatic" suggestions?

[Ser Clegane]

Thanks ser... and everyone who suggest that I should try to solve the problem with my girl first... unfortunely, that filthy man was her supervisor...
She initially said that he was annoying, but she can't just avoid him, without fear of getting fired...

It was really every odd against me now as Ser Cleagne allready pointed out, I didn't even understand why such man can get a hit on a new hire... But for the worst part, from my friend's information I've got, he was usually a serious and good man... It was the first time he showing off to care about a girl!!! and WTF he told to all his workmate that he was really serious and want to marry her... OMG!!!

Yeah... all odds against me... a serious, mature, and well positioned man hitting on a new hire is not entirely unapreciated.... if he was usually a serious man, and only this time show the attitude.... that's why I fear that he was really fall in love with her, and that was really made me boil... yeah, she was responsive a bit because his seniority factor... but what could say about "repeated incursions?"...

OK - highlighted some parts in the quote above.

Your response implies that your girl might indeed not be really interested in him but just buckled at some point because he was her supervisor and she is the new hire and she did not want to offend him (to some extent the attention of the supervisor might of course be flattering for her).
Again - clarify with her so that you know where the two of you stand. Is she just playing along, hoping that it will stop at some point or does she actually like him and would actively pursue a relationship?

This and your later points (i.e. this guy suddently acting out of character) illustrate why a lot of employers are not very fond of workplace relationships with people in the same department (or even worse between a sipervisor and a report). Do you know what your girlfriend's employer's policy is in such a situation?

[Cute Wolf]

Yeah, in front of me, she said that she only act along in front of her seniors to avoid being fired... but at my back, from my friend's report, she recently said that she consider that filthy man's proposal...

Why the wolrd is look on conspiring against me....

Oh yeah... I didn't know much about her employer and their policy, except she was working on the accounting division...
Looks like I must try to either trust her words completely, or mistrust her at all...

[Subotan]

Trust. You can't build a relationship on mistrust. If you're wrong, and she is cheating on you, then you wouldn't have had a relationship anyway.

[miotas]

You should go to Queensland. Their anti-duelling laws were abolished a few years ago

[Philippus Flavius Homovallumus]

Yeah, in front of me, she said that she only act along in front of her seniors to avoid being fired... but at my back, from my friend's report, she recently said that she consider that filthy man's proposal...

Why the wolrd is look on conspiring against me....

Oh yeah... I didn't know much about her employer and their policy, except she was working on the accounting division...
Looks like I must try to either trust her words completely, or mistrust her at all...

Frankly, I think you have already overrreacted, and she probably isn't impressed. Get your head scred back on and remind her why she chose you to begin with.

[Ser Clegane]

Please keep this thread clean

Thanks

[Aemilius Paulus]

Trust. You can't build a relationship on mistrust. If you're wrong, and she is cheating on you, then you wouldn't have had a relationship anyway.

Yeah, I would say the same thing.

I see you have jealousy, which appears to be perfectly normal behaviour, but I confess I fail to understand it - being asexual does not help. But what use is the jealousy here? If your GF truly likes you, she will stay with you. If the other bloke wins her, then the two of you are not meant to be. Be nice to her, tell her you do not like the other bloke's behaviour - offer her the hypothetical scenario of another girl wooing you, and see what she chooses. If she chooses the other person, than so be it - you cannot have a relationship without trust, as Subo said, and if she does not view you as positively as she does some other men, then you will run into problems later. Better now than later to see if the two of you are compatible.

Whatever it is, fighting is immature and will only antagonise your GF.


NOTE: I did not read all of the other posts on this thread, to the contrary of my personal policy. I apologise for any possible repetition.