an EB story

[Zradha Pahlavan]

Until, thanks to the help of his little brother, a green centipede, and a drunk Persian, the EB script was accidentally turned off, and he found himself in the magical world of vanilla Rome Total War where prehistoric giant elephants, purple horsemen, ogres, and ninjas made their homes.

[satalexton]

Fantasy it may be, Alexandros intends to rejoin his crusade against Roma; he petitions the EB team for a way back, and they bade him to follow the yellow brick road.

[Zradha Pahlavan]

On his way he met Ptolemais and Seleucus, who were always squabbling. They both saw him, and they both told him to stay away from India. "What's an India?", thought Alexandros, as he continued...

[Arthur, king of the Britons]

Later he came across a machine with an big red button on it. Next the button a note said: Activate EB script, and Alexandros pressed the trigger and was thus returned to the somewhat logical world of EB.

[Titus Marcellus Scato]

Continuing his journeys, Alexandros met a strange Scythian barbarian, who offered him a beautiful blonde bride, who apparently didn't speak much Greek apart from 'yes' and 'more' so Alexandros wouldn't be bothered by her nagging. "Sure," said Alexandros, "...I could really do with a good woman to keep me company." The Scythian told him to return to the same spot in a month, where his bride would be waiting, but asked for 100 mnai to pay for the wedding and expenses. Alexandros readily agreed, and paid up. "See you here next month!" said the Scythian. "Hmm," thought Alexandros, "that was a bit steep for a wedding, this had better be good!"

[plutoboyz]

The next month, Alexandros go to the same place as promised. Alexandros didn't realize the Scythian actually a bounty hunter who looking for him in exchange for 3 mnai. the trap was successfull. Alexandros found himself being surrounded by 1.000.000.000.000.000.000.000 Duna Asya. The greedy Scythian then order his horde to kill Alexandros while he go inside his tent with Alexandros supposed-to-be-his Bride.

[satalexton]

on the LAST moment, in the BRINK of time, Alexandros decided that he actually liked men instead. Thus he unwittingly spared himself from a grueling fate....

[Zradha Pahlavan]

Damn, just a second too late...

(REWRITE)
Alexandros then purchased some goats from the Scythians for 5 mnai apiece. One of the goats had a wonderfully soft wool, and that goat became Alexandros' personal favorite. Everyday he fed it special mustard brought in by caravans from the Orient.

[plutoboyz]

Alexandros the unlucky... the Special Mustard was really special. it contain Anthrax! it kill the goat and even infecting Alexandros and all living creature around him.