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Thread: Roll to Dodge: The Gem of Eternity [Concluded]

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  1. #1
    Mayor Member Seon's Avatar
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    Default Re: Roll to Dodge: The Gem of Eternity

    Quote Originally Posted by Diamondeye View Post
    Thus convinced of my own awesomeness (the chicks must be waiting for me to save the world while wearing the awesome wolf shirt on fire), I stride casually after the others inside and kick the demon attacking Landlubber.
    1: You scream around like a little chicken on fire (the T-shirt, by the way, due to its thick plot armor, is fine) and run randomly around the tower (which, incidentally, makes no difference because of how ****ing huge the tower is) until you learn to duck, cover, and roll, putting out the flames. Luckily you only received first degree burns on 50% of your body.

    Quote Originally Posted by Joooray
    Use Mr Spocks knockout move to incapaciate the zergling demon.
    3: You pinch the zergling demon in the neck, doing absolutely no damage. Another zergling demon pounces on you...

    ROLL TO DODGE! 5: Oh so that's how you do the Vulcan Nerve Pinch...

    Quote Originally Posted by landlubber
    Check to see if there's a first aid kit in my pocket
    6: Inside youir pocket you find...

    Neosporin
    Band Aid
    Bandages
    Medical Tape
    Medical Glue
    Peptobismal
    Aspirins
    Anacetrapib
    EMILA
    Pillz
    First Aid Kits
    A bottle of Holy Water
    A bottle with some sort of glowy stuff inside.
    How to survive in a zombie apocalypse book
    Book entitled Joooray dies at the end
    Book entitled How to fit a boat into your pocket
    A live concussion grenade.

    ROLL TO DODGE! 3: It explodes 3 meter from your hand, flinging you away considerable distance and blowing apart all zerglings. Miraculously, both you and Joooray survived, although you are very shaken.

    Quote Originally Posted by Chaotix
    I attempt to LEVITATE straight to the top of the tower and see if there's a rooftop entrance
    2: You feel yourself wobbling back down as your chi is used up...

  2. #2
    Knight of Flowers Member Diamondeye's Avatar
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    Default Re: Roll to Dodge: The Gem of Eternity

    I beg Landlubber to fix my burns and promise not to tell the females about my disastrous entré - the last in a low, hushed whisper while looking around sceptically.
    If God is great, and if God is good, why can't he change the hearts of men?"
    -Tom Waits, "The Road to Peace"

  3. #3
    2 cute to execute Member Joooray's Avatar
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    Default Re: Roll to Dodge: The Gem of Eternity

    Being stunned by the contents of ll's pocket, I also check mine.

    Supreme Victory, The Shadow Fort
    © Crazed Rabbit

  4. #4
    The .org's resident pirate Member landlubber's Avatar
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    Default Re: Roll to Dodge: The Gem of Eternity

    I stop the bleeding.

  5. #5
    The Bad Doctor Senior Member Chaotix's Avatar
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    Default Re: Roll to Dodge: The Gem of Eternity

    I learn to control my chi so that I might better implement my powers of LEVITATION.
    Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer: The Gameroom

  6. #6
    Mayor Member Seon's Avatar
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    Default Re: Roll to Dodge: The Gem of Eternity

    Quote Originally Posted by Diamondeye View Post
    I beg Landlubber to fix my burns and promise not to tell the females about my disastrous entré - the last in a low, hushed whisper while looking around sceptically.
    3: You drag yourself closer to landlubber, whimpering

    Quote Originally Posted by Joooray
    Being stunned by the contents of ll's pocket, I also check mine
    1: You empty the contents of your pocket down the gigantic hole in the middle of the room (did I mention that before?). Now you know that they are empty.

    Quote Originally Posted by landlubber
    I'll stop the bleeding
    6: You slap some novasporin on your cuts, dab some antibiotics on Diamondeye's Joooray's and your wounds, and then treat them all nicely with some bandages, finally swallowing some pillz as well. They all feel much better now.

    By the way...

    ROLL TO DODGE!

    4: An acid phelgm fired by a zergling demon grazes your cheek.

    Quote Originally Posted by Chaotix
    I learn to control my chi so that I might better implement my powers of LEVITATION.
    2: We're going down captain!

    You plummet to the ground, spraining your ankle in the process.

  7. #7
    2 cute to execute Member Joooray's Avatar
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    Default Re: Roll to Dodge: The Gem of Eternity

    I check my body if there is anything left that I have not thrown into the hole. Stupid 1. *grumble*

    Quote Originally Posted by Seon View Post
    Book entitled Joooray dies at the end
    BTW: What's that supposed to mean?!

    Supreme Victory, The Shadow Fort
    © Crazed Rabbit

  8. #8
    Knight of Flowers Member Diamondeye's Avatar
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    Default Re: Roll to Dodge: The Gem of Eternity

    I jump into the hole to fetch Joooray's things.
    If God is great, and if God is good, why can't he change the hearts of men?"
    -Tom Waits, "The Road to Peace"

  9. #9
    The .org's resident pirate Member landlubber's Avatar
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    Default Re: Roll to Dodge: The Gem of Eternity

    I read "Joooray dies at the end."

  10. #10
    The Bad Doctor Senior Member Chaotix's Avatar
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    Default Re: Roll to Dodge: The Gem of Eternity

    I focus my chi to HEAL my sprained ankle.
    Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer: The Gameroom

  11. #11
    Mayor Member Seon's Avatar
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    Default Re: Roll to Dodge: The Gem of Eternity

    Quote Originally Posted by Joooray View Post
    I check my body if there is anything left that I have not thrown into the hole. Stupid 1. *grumble*


    BTW: What's that supposed to mean?!
    1: You throw in your clothes as well. Now you are naked. Female readers may wish to avert their eyes now.

    Quote Originally Posted by Diamondeye
    I jump into the hole to fetch Joooray's things
    6: You leap into the hole, catching Joooray's clothes midair and throwing them (disgusted) back at Joooray. Then you snatch a parcel entitled "Seon. Co's Survival Kit, contents of which will be revealed if you stop falling.

    Did I remind you that you were still falling?

    This may be a time to panic now.

    Read "Joooray Dies at the End"
    4: It is hundreds of pages long, and the first page reads...

    "STOP!

    You shouldn't have touched this book with your bare hands.

    No, don't put it down, it's too late.

    They're watching you."

    Who's watching? You don't have time to ask that question as a blob of acid flew straight at your face.

    Roll to Dodge!

    You block it with your hands, causing VERY intense pain.

    Quote Originally Posted by Chaotix
    I focus my chi to HEAL my sprained ankle
    6: You fix your ankle, cure your gonorhhea (did I mention that before?), and also fix your eyesight so that you can see hidden things and hidden things can see you. You can see that several ninja looking creatures are wandering around the tower and that there is a hidden stairway in the center of the tower's massive room filled with zerglings demons.

    Did I mention that hidden things can see you now?

    6 ninjas attack.

    Roll to Dodge! 4: A sword strike nearly cuts your head off.

  12. #12
    The .org's resident pirate Member landlubber's Avatar
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    Default Re: Roll to Dodge: The Gem of Eternity

    Fix my hands.

  13. #13
    2 cute to execute Member Joooray's Avatar
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    Default Re: Roll to Dodge: The Gem of Eternity

    I put my clothes back on and then lay down in foetal position and cry, because the Gods of Dice hate me.

    Supreme Victory, The Shadow Fort
    © Crazed Rabbit

  14. #14
    The Bad Doctor Senior Member Chaotix's Avatar
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    Default Re: Roll to Dodge: The Gem of Eternity

    I focus my chi to create a SWORD OF SPIRIT ENERGY to fight the ninjas with.
    Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer: The Gameroom

  15. #15
    Mayor Member Seon's Avatar
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    Default Re: Roll to Dodge: The Gem of Eternity

    Too sane to update right now, I apologize for the inconvenience.

  16. #16
    Mayor Member Seon's Avatar
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    Default Re: Roll to Dodge: The Gem of Eternity

    Quote Originally Posted by landlubber View Post
    Fix my hands.
    1: You amputate it.

    Quote Originally Posted by Joooray
    I put my clothes back on and then lay down in foetal position and cry, because the Gods of Dice hate me.
    6: You do it so well and realistically that few zerglings, unable to know what a "foetal position" is, explodes. They never went to the Commonwealth before, you see. Unfortunately you are still bawling like a little baby and it may or may not attract the attention of a GIANT BOSS MONSTER. Wait, WHAT GIANT BOSS MONSTER?!

    Quote Originally Posted by Chaotix
    I focus my chi to create a SWORD OF SPIRIT ENERGY to fight the ninjas with.
    6: With a mighty yell, you form a sword 10 feet tall out of pure energy (wait what?!). Unfortunately you don't know how to control chi, only do something cool with it, and it sputters out moments later because of overexertion of energy. Ninjas are intimidated, however, by this act and backs up two paces.

    Of course, lack of chi means that you can't use chi related attacks anymore until you recharge them, MWAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

    No, you don't know how to meditate either.

    Quote Originally Posted by Winston
    In what is almost certainly a flagrant violation of the rules, I ride my dinosaur out of the sunset and into the middle of whatever it is that's going on here...
    Don't tempt fate, my boy.

    Your dinosaur meets the Red Mage

    Quote Originally Posted by Diamondeye
    I consider whether to stop falling or to start panicking before deciding to do both - at once!
    5: You panic and pull out something from the survival kit, a small Swiss Knife, and fire the grappling hook gun attachment in order to pull you back up the hole. In addition the Swiss Knife, the kit contains...

    -A Pistol with 2 magazines of ammo
    -My first pet bear kit
    -2 week's rations
    -2 liter of water.
    -A copy of the book "Joooray dies at the end."
    -A serum of some kind of purple liquid.
    -bandages
    -A mirror that quite clearly shows a giant boss monster hanging from the ceiling while approaching you from behind
    -A portable nuclear generator

    All in less than 2 kg box,
    Last edited by Seon; 10-11-2010 at 19:01.

  17. #17
    Knight of Flowers Member Diamondeye's Avatar
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    Default Re: Roll to Dodge: The Gem of Eternity

    Hoping to avoid combat with the Boss Monster, I perform an impressive leap of logic that determines that if Joooray dies at the end, it means that this thing will end if Joooray dies. So I check my ammo and then I shoot him.
    If God is great, and if God is good, why can't he change the hearts of men?"
    -Tom Waits, "The Road to Peace"

  18. #18
    Banned ELITEofWARMANGINGERYBREADMEN88's Avatar
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    Default Re: Roll to Dodge: The Gem of Eternity

    Can I join.

  19. #19
    Mayor Member Seon's Avatar
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    Default Re: Roll to Dodge: The Gem of Eternity

    Quote Originally Posted by Diamondeye View Post
    Hoping to avoid combat with the Boss Monster, I perform an impressive leap of logic that determines that if Joooray dies at the end, it means that this thing will end if Joooray dies. So I check my ammo and then I shoot him.
    5: You whip out your pistol and fire a shot straight in between Joooray's eyes

    Roll to dodge!

    6: Joooray dodges the bullet like a Matrix agent, pulls out a plasma pistol and starts to overcharge it...

    Quote Originally Posted by Joooray
    then stare the Boss Monster to death
    1: Avoid...eye...contact...

    The Boss Monster, seeing that you are distracted, attacks you

    ROLL TO DODGE!

    3: It bit you in the leg, and the venom of the giant spiderlike monster makes it go all numb and stuff.

    Quote Originally Posted by landlubber
    look for a substitute for my hands
    6: You rip off one of the scythelike claws of the bossmonster and attach it to your arms. NICE!

    Unfortunately the Boss Monster doesn't take this too well and attacks you with its OTHER scythe

    Roll to Dodge! 5: CLANG! You easily deflect the attack with your own scythelike arm and then slash at the monster's abdoman with it.

    Quote Originally Posted by Chaotix
    I groan at the loss of my chi powers and decide to probe my nose for anything useful
    3: You find nothing, what did you expect?

    Meanwhile, the ninjas attack at you with shurikans!

    ROLL TO DODGE! 3: It hits you in the chest.

    Quote Originally Posted by Byzantine Knight
    Sorry :P I would like to wave at AntiKingWarmanCake
    1: You knock his head off with a rocket powered punch.

    Quote Originally Posted by Lord of Lent
    give everyone (including myself) a package to introduce myself
    COWER IN FEAR, BRIEF MORTAL, FOR YOU HAVE BROKEN MY MOST SACRED COVENANT, THAT NONE MAY INTERFERE WITH THE LAWS OF CAUSALITY! NOW I SHALL SEND THEE TO THE GOLDEN LAND WHERE EVEN THE GOLD ROSES OF THE SOIL RISES TO TEAR YOU APART AND USE YOUR HAMBURGER-LIKE MEAT AND PIECES OF BONE MARROW AS FERTILIZER!

    Nah just kidding. Just don't do it again.

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