As noted above you'll be told when a new family member comes of age that he can attend the Agoge in Sparte. Basically, he has to get there before he's 20, and then stay there for 4 years. Completing the Agoge normally gives your general +1 influence and +1 morale for his troops, which seems a pretty poor return for 4 years of his life. But you might have someone who excels (+2/+2), or even someone who gets invited to join the Spartan "secret police". And if you build up a good academy in Sparte then your militaristic types can do their studying and get ancillaries while at the Agoge, while your wimpy bureaucrats can do the same in Athens.
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