The Half Monty [Concluded]

[Askthepizzaguy]

Day Two

5 Khazaar (Romanic, Capt Blackadder, Renata, fluffy, "Askthepizzaguy")
4 Zack (GE, DIY, slashandburn, Csargo)
3 Renata (JHT, Yaropolk, Khazaar)
3 Fluffy (Zack, robbie, classical)
1 God Emperor (Nightbringer**)
--
1 not voting (pever)

Springfield City Hall


Waylon Smithers: "Those responsible for murdering Monty Burns are still at large. I think we should grab someone and make them pay for this crime. It's what Monty would have wanted; swift, brutal revenge."

Moe the Bartender: "Well uh, who do you recommends? We can't let a lynch mob like this go to waste. Let's get to the revengening!"

Groundskeeper Willie: "I think we should get rid of the fat one. Toss him in the school's deep fryer, and cover him with steak sauce and feed 'im to Mister Burns' hounds."

Comic Book Guy: "If that is the best execution you can come up with, then I will be on the internet in precisely 37 seconds blogging my displeasure for all to see."

Barney Gumble: "I think the monkey did it!"

Lisa Simpson: "What monkey, mister Gumble?"

Barney Gumble: "Who are you callin' a monkey, little miss smarty pants?"

Lisa Simpson: "No, I'm asking you, what monkey killed Mister Burns?"

Barney Gumble: "A MONKEY KILLED MISTER BURNS??? RUN AWAY, THERE'S A MURDEROUS MONKEY ON THE LOOSE!!!" *BELCH*

Marge Simpson: "If we have to do this unpleasant business, let's put it to a vote."

Sideshow Mel: "Indeed! The people must decide!"

Chief Clancy Wiggum: "Okay, I've got all the votes here in this box. And I'm sure it hasn't been tampered with, because the lock on the ballot box is unbroken."

Lisa Simpson: "But Chief Wiggum, it wasn't even locked. Someone has probably stuffed the ballot box."

Mayor Quimby: "Well err ahh who would commit that kind of voting fraud? I have faith in the ah people of err Springfield, to vote their conscience, and vote Quimby!"

Lisa Simpson: "But mayor Quimby, this isn't an election, it's an execution."

Mayor Quimby: "I knew that, but uh thank you for reminding me, sweet little girl. Let me just change my vote really quickly then."

*Mayor Quimby scribbles a different name on the piece of paper and shoves it in the ballot box*



Clancy Wiggum: "I've counted the votes, and the official tally is..... five votes for Sideshow Mel, and four votes for...."

Sideshow Mel: "What? This is an outrage! I demand a recount!"

Mayor Quimby: "Once again the people have er ah decided. Throw him in the deep fryer!"

Clancy Wiggum: "Deep fryer? Can't I just shoot him in the face or something?"

Homer Simpson: "Too late, pal! The mob has spoken!"

Seymour Skinner: "Lunchlady Doris, wheel in the industrial-sized fry-o-lator."

A massive vat of boiling grease is brought into the middle of the meeting.

Ralph Wiggum: "That smells yummy. Is he going in the hot tub, daddy?"

Chief Wiggum: "Yes, my little Ralphie. Now you get to see how McDonald's chicken McNuggets are made!"

Ralph Wiggum: "Our dog's breath smells like cat poop!"

Sideshow Mel: "Oh, how it burns my skin! What a horrifying way to shuffle off this mortal coil!"

Groundskeeper Willie: "Ach, shut your noisemaker, you bone-wearin' motor-mouthed pudding cup! That oil isn't even hot enough to kill the E. Coli the chicken nuggets are swimmin' in, you grass-wearin' whistle-blower!"

Sideshow Mel: "Well if it's not hot enough to kill me, what's the point?"

Homer Simpson: "Marge, may I?"

Marge Simpson: "Here you go, homey."


Marge hands Homer the iron frying pan, who promptly bashes Wiggum's face so hard that it makes his nose look like a pig's snout.



Homer Simpson: "That's for arresting Mel Gibson! That man has brought the world nothing but wholesome, family friendly entertainment, like Braveheart and The Passion of the Christ, and Lethal Weapon 4!"

Clancy Wiggum: "OW!!! Was that really necessary?"

Marge Simpson: "Uh, Homey, we're executing Sideshow Mel...."

Homer Simpson: "Who?"

Marge Simpson: "Krusty the Clown's sidekick?"

Homer Simpson: "Oh, Bonehead? I got nothin' against him."

Sideshow Mel: "I always feared this fateful day would come. Cruel fortune..... but I must die with dignity. I have poisoned myself with strychnine, and it should be taking effect rather soon...."

Seymour Skinner: "Oh, sweet, innocent Mel. That oil is practically nothing but strychnine. The school has a bit of a rodent and bird infestation."

Lisa Simpson: "Which shouldn't even kill Sideshow Mel, as the Fox-owned Spring chemical manufacturing plant located next to the Springfield reservoir has been dumping excess strychnine into the town's water supply for decades, and everyone in town has already developed an immunity to the otherwise lethal poison."

Hans Moleman: "Not me..... I always drink bottled water...."

Lisa Simpson: "Well, if you drink any of the major brands that label themselves 'Spring' water, then you're drinking water that's been bottled at the Springfield reservoir, next to the 'Spring' chemical plant. That's why they can avoid lawsuits for false advertising while maintaining a surprisingly low production cost."

Hans Moleman: "I think I'm going to be sick...."

Lisa Simpson: "None of this would have happened if you all had listened to the school essay I wrote for Earth Day entitled 'Spring water, delicious natural refreshment, or toxic sludge?'"

Sideshow Mel: "I can't take this anymore. The child is too much of a know-it-all, even for me!"

Sideshow Mel takes the giant bone out of his hair and smashes his own skull in with it, ending his life.

Khazaar- Sideshow Mel

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

Sideshow Mel was innocent!

Alive: 15/18


Captain Blackadder
classical_hero
Csargo
Death is yonder
God Emperor
Johnhughthom
Nightbringer
pevergreen
Renata
Robbiecon
Romanic
Slashandburn
TheFluffyOne
Yaropolk
Zack


Dead: 3/18

Askthepizzaguy- Charles Montgomery Burns (Innocent)
Diamondeye- Bart Simpson (Innocent)
Khazaar- Sideshow Mel (Innocent)








Begin Night Two.

And yes, the tally was altered.

[classical_hero]

How many people are reading that with the voice characters in their heads? I know I am,

[Yaropolk]

So Zack, are you Quimby or his scum partner?

[Zack]

Whichever one is rolling their eyes more.

[Askthepizzaguy]

Night Two

Flanders residence

Ned Flanders: "Ok Rodster, Toddster, did you brush your teeth and say your prayers?"

Rod Flanders: "Yes daddy! I prayed three times to make sure Jesus heard it!"

Todd Flanders: "I prayed four times to make sure Jesus could hear mine more!"

Ned Flanders: "Now sons, it's not a contest. Jesus will decide which of you has the purest soul on the day of your judgment."

Rod Flanders: "After we die and go up to heaven to see mommy again."

Todd Flanders: "When are we going to die, daddy?"

Ned Flanders: "Not for a long time. But don't you worry, if you two are good little boys, and grow up to be good men who love their wives and don't drink or dance or swear, then someday, it will happen to you, too."

Rod and Todd: "YAYYYY!!!!"

Ned Flanders: "If you pray really hard, maybe Jesus will let you know when Death is yonder."

Suddenly, Death is yonder stops reading and begins cursing at the computer screen. The rest of you keep reading.

Rod Flanders: "Daddy, what were those strange words that bad man was saying?"

Ned Flanders: "Cover your ears, children. Those are curse words. And those who speak them know for certain that eternal Death is yonder."

Todd Flanders: "Death is yonder?"

Ned Flanders: "Yep, Death is yonder."

Rod Flanders: "Let me make sure I heard you Daddy. What was yonder?"

Ned Flanders: "Well, Rod my boy, Death is yonder. Those who speak the words of curse know that their death is yonder. And that's why you shouldn't say those words."

Todd Flanders: "Curse words make baby Jesus cry."

Rod Flanders: "And then, Death is yonder!"

Ned Flanders: "Yes, Death is indeed yonder. Having said that, it's getting late. I'm dead on my feet, and I feel a little stiff. I need to go rest in peace. And remember kids, tomorrow, we're going to go out to the country and see about buying that farm."

Rod and Todd: "YAYYYYY!!!"



Ned closes the door to Rod and Todd's bedroom, when he hears the click of a revolver. He turns around to see someone or something pointing the weapon right at his face.




Ned Flanders: "Well hidely ho, intruder-eeno. I see you've got a gun pointed at my sniffer. Well friend, I keep three hundred dollars cash in the box next to the front door, with a big old sign that says "help yourself". No need to give nervous Neddy the heebie-jeebies! And if you need help carrying off my big screen TV, I'll be happy to oblige!"

The intruder just grinned silently, and slid forward into the light, where Ned could get a good look at.... whatever it was. Cigar smoke swirled around the figure.

Ned Flanders: "Why, you.... you're nothing but a... a.... vicious, godless beast!"

The armed intruder just started laughing. The inhuman screeching continued, until the figure pulled the trigger, splattering Ned Flanders' brains all over the bedroom door.

Rod Flanders: "YAYYYY!!! Daddy's reunited with Mommy!"

Todd Flanders: "I guess Death really was yonder."

Death is yonder- Ned Flanders

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

Ned Flanders was innocent!

Alive: 14/18


Captain Blackadder
classical_hero
Csargo
God Emperor
Johnhughthom
Nightbringer
pevergreen
Renata
Robbiecon
Romanic
Slashandburn
TheFluffyOne
Yaropolk
Zack


Dead: 4/18

Askthepizzaguy- Charles Montgomery Burns (Innocent)
Diamondeye- Bart Simpson (Innocent)
Khazaar- Sideshow Mel (Innocent)
Death is yonder- Ned Flanders (Innocent)







Begin Day Three.

[classical_hero]

We are looking for a monkey, since he is our suspect. Mr Teeny needs to be put out of his misery.

[Death is yonder]

Bah

Seems like I got killed for being a bit too on the mark eh Zack?

Plus killing the quiet guy is always a safe bet

[johnhughthom]

Mr Mayorman, I forgetted your secrets so it's unpossible for me to tell anybody.

[pevergreen]

No reeeeeal loss enyway, I heeted the churchie guay.

[Yaropolk]

vote: zack
Explain how and why you were saved from lynch last night.

[Askthepizzaguy]

Day Three

Town Hall

The group argued and bickered, and then got tired of it and counted up the votes.

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

Zack (3): Fluffy, NB, GE
Fluffy (3): Zack, Romanic, Classical
Slash: Renata, Yaro,
Renata: JHT
abstain: slash

It turned out, the vote was deadlocked, and they couldn't agree on what to do. Without a clear course of action chosen by a plurality, the Mayor had no choice but to order the citizens back home to get some rest.

Mayor Quimby: "I er ah think that what we need right now is decisive leadership! So, what I will do, as your Mayor, is wait and see what you think tomorrow!"








Alive: 14/18


Captain Blackadder
classical_hero
Csargo
God Emperor
Johnhughthom
Nightbringer
pevergreen
Renata
Robbiecon
Romanic
Slashandburn
TheFluffyOne
Yaropolk
Zack


Dead: 4/18

Askthepizzaguy- Charles Montgomery Burns (Innocent)
Diamondeye- Bart Simpson (Innocent)
Khazaar- Sideshow Mel (Innocent)
Death is yonder- Ned Flanders (Innocent)





Begin Night Three.

[Romanic]

That was quick, but no cool writeup. :(

Pizza is not happy with the activity level.

[Askthepizzaguy]

That was quick, but no cool writeup. :(

Pizza is not happy with the activity level.

Pizza is creatively drained from the Revengening design process. Personal goals are not easy to design and balance.

[Csargo]

Pizza is creatively drained from the Revengening design process. Personal goals are not easy to design and balance.

Personal goals? We didn't have personal goals whenever I was a kid. We had a stick and a hoop. We would push the hoop around with the stick and we were happy with that. Didn't need personal goals back then, I don't know what's wrong with you kids today.

[Askthepizzaguy]

Personal goals? We didn't have personal goals whenever I was a kid. We had a stick and a hoop. We would push the hoop around with the stick and we were happy with that. Didn't need personal goals back then, I don't know what's wrong with you kids today.

Hoops? You had hoops??? In MY day there were no hoops. We had two games, poke someone in the eye with a stick, or get poked in the eye with a stick. And sometimes we didn't even have a stick, and we had to experiment with whatever else we had just hanging around that we could poke each other with.

I'd prefer not to talk about that game...

[Yaropolk]

I've done a bit of previous vote analysis and I think that Zack is a very solid vote. As we have just learned, Robbiecon aka Marge Simpson aka Sideshow Bob was the mafia mastermind. Let's examine his voting pattern:

Day 1:

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

3 Diamondeye (Csargo, Khazaar, classical_hero)
2 TheFluffyOne (Nightbringer, God Emperor)
2 Yaropolk (Diamondeye, Romanic)
2 johnhughthom (pevergreen, Zack)
1 God Emperor (Death is yonder)
1 Capt Blackadder (Renata)
1 robbiecon (Capt Blackadder)
1 Renata (johnhughthom)
1 Csargo (robbiecon)
1 Nightbringer (Thefluffyone)
1 Romanic (Yaropolk)
1 Death is yonder (slashandburn)

Robbie votes for csargo, this may be a safe vote early on for a team mate to distance yourself. Robbie is shown in the night writeup (as Marge Simpson), establishing his pro-town credibility.

Day 2:

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

5 Khazaar (Romanic, Capt Blackadder, Renata x 2, fluffy)
4 Zack (GE, DIY, slashandburn, Csargo)
3 Renata (JHT, Yaropolk, Khazaar)
3 Fluffy (Zack, robbie, classical)
1 God Emperor (Nightbringer**)
--
1 not voting (pever)

You better think twice before attacking Marjorie Simpson (nee Bouvier). I'll have my pan, and whatever else I can lay my hands on at the ready.

Now, I don't think Zack is the person who attacked me last night, but it's clear from my poor Bart being brutally picked upon yesterday that someone is out to kill us Simpsons.

So I'm gonna have to go with Vote: thefluffyone93

Robbie puts his townie cred to use protecting Zack. Robbie and Zack voting together for CH, neither one flinches to break the Zack-Khazar tie. In this game ties result in no lynch, so probably smart move. Renata's Quimby vote pushes Khazaar over Zack.

Day 3:

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

Zack (3): Fluffy, NB, GE
Fluffy (3): Zack, Romanic, Classical
Slash: Renata, Yaro,
Renata: JHT
abstain: slash

I have been reading the thread on my iPod, but writing isn't much fun on it.

Ok, well we have zack, who I firmly believe is being framed, and a dead obvious one at that. Slashandburn, well I do not see the sense in that either, where exactly did that come from? And fluffy is just a continuation from yesterday.

I'm thinking we should perhaps vote for Romanic, he's really taken control of the game, what with posting vote counts etc. Perhaps he's trying to emphasise who is currently being voted for, so that those who haven't voted yet just go for those with more votes. Also he voted for zack after Yaropolk, even stating that it seemed too easy a set up but going with it anyway.

I won't vote for Romanic at this venture, as it is merely speculation, but if I , Marge should be attacked again, I'd like if you could lynch him. Also he's one of those who hasn't really implied who he is, while many have hinted.

Once again robbie makes a post to protect Zack, but doesn't come to his aid to break the tie. Tied vote results in no lynch. Renata (aka tie breaker) is killed of at night.

Day 4:

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

Classical Hero (6): jh, romanic, yaro, fluffy, robbie, cb
zack (2): csargo, fluffy
fluffy: zack


After fluffy's vote for zack

Vote: classical_hero

I remain sure that Zack is innocent.

Early pressure on Zack. Immediately after Fluffy's vote on Zack, robbie responds with a post defending him, then votes for CH. CH bandwagon choo choo chooses ralphie!

Day 5:

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

Csargo: 2 (pever, Romanic)
pevergreen: 2 (Nightbringer, DE2)
Fluffy: 1 (God Emperor)
Blackadder: 1 (Robbie)
Zack: 1 (Zack)

Tie between Csargo and Pever results in no lynch. Neither Zack nor robbie break the tie. Robbie doesn't vote at all. Potentially Csargo is one of the scum who they wanted to save (see Day 1 analysis)


Conclusion:

Clearly robbie flinched almost every time Zack was near the top of the list. I think Zack is a very good lynch candidate for today. The case on Csargo is weaker, but if we have a roleblocker or investigator among us, he is a good candidate for tonight.

Vote: Zack

[Askthepizzaguy]

Night Three

Town Hall

Mayor Quimby: "How would you uh like a street named after you?"

Porsche: *loud giggling*

Mayor Quimby: "I could make you my top advisor on women's issues."

Alexis: "I thought I was your top advisor?"

Mayor Quimby: "You're my top advisor on sexual harassment in the workplace."

Alexis: "Can I get a raise?"

Mayor Quimby: "If you do that er ah thing we talked about, I'll triple your salary."

Alexis: *giggling* "Okay!"

*BUZZZZZ*

Mayor Quimby: "Be right back, girls. That's the pizza I ordered."

.......




Delivery Man: "Your total is $23.97."

Mayor Quimby: "Here is 24 dollars. You can er ah keep the change."

Delivery Man: ...........




When they found Mayor Quimby's body, a team of highly trained monkeys were able to piece together most of it. Deep inside his lower intestine, they found three shiny pennies.

Renata- Mayor Quimby

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

Mayor Quimby was innocent!

Alive: 13/18


Captain Blackadder
classical_hero
Csargo
God Emperor
Johnhughthom
Nightbringer
pevergreen
Robbiecon
Romanic
Slashandburn
TheFluffyOne
Yaropolk
Zack


Dead: 5/18

Askthepizzaguy- Charles Montgomery Burns (Innocent)
Diamondeye- Bart Simpson (Innocent)
Khazaar- Sideshow Mel (Innocent)
Death is yonder- Ned Flanders (Innocent)
Renata- Mayor "Diamond" Joe Quimby (Innocent)


Begin Day Four.

[Nightbringer]

I sense possible allusions to real life in this write-up.

[Renata]

LOL.

[Askthepizzaguy]

I sense possible allusions to real life in this write-up.

Several times daily, without fail.


Curse the store that makes 10 dollar pizza plus 10 dollar pizza plus 2.50 delivery plus sales tax end up with a .97 on the end of the price.... didn't they realize that the number would make up about half of their order totals, and people will just leave the pennies? Argh and harrumph.

[classical_hero]

I think it is time to go after Zack

[Askthepizzaguy]

Day Four

Town Hall

Lisa Simpson: "Wait, everyone! Before you execute another fellow Springfieldian based purely on randomness, I want to appeal to your sense of justice and decency!"

Moe the Bartender: "I don't know what most of those there words mean, but you're sounding awfully scumtastic to me."

Professor Frink: "According to my calculations, this young lady has a 23.0769% chance of being guilty."

Barney Gumble: "I agree with Professor Nerd Boy! Let's string her up!"

Comic Book Guy: "Ah yes, one Lisa Simpson. I seem to recall that you've been innocent in every game so far, so surely that means we're about to experience a classic Pizzaguy plot twist, wherein the little girl is revealed to be the ghastly killer."

Ralph Wiggum: "Hi Lisa! Bye Lisa!"

Principal Skinner: "This young lady has been wrecking the grade curve for the past three semesters. Our school is losing money because miss Know-It-All here has turned us into a D-average school!"

Lisa Simpson: "Mom! Dad! You wouldn't let them do this to me! You love me too much!"

Marge Simpson: "Sorry sweetie. I've always believed in you. If you decided to be a killer, I know you'd be excellent at it. You're my special little girl. I'll support you no matter what you choose to do."

Homer Simpson: "My little girl? The greatest killer ever to terrorize Springfield? ....I'm so proud of you, honey!"

Lisa Simpson: "What? .....WHAT???? I can't believe I'm hearing this. You guys would never act this way. There's something wrong here. There's something wrong with all of you if you can't even tell that a little girl is INNOCENT!!!"

Groundskeeper Willie: "Ach, lassie, I would never assume a wee one is innocent. Most of ye are vicious little hellions. If you aren't guilty of this crime, yer guilty of somethin!"

Lisa Simpson: "....Hans Moleman, you're a soft-spoken, level-headed elderly gentlemen, who has endured more near-death experiences than anyone else in town. Please tell me you believe me when I say I didn't kill Mister Burns!"

Hans Moleman: "It's about time we killed someone besides me..... I say string her uuuuuup....."

Lisa Simpson: "Waylon Smithers, I know you cared deeply for Mister Burns, and you want justice, but I also know you're a kind and decent man who wouldn't hurt a fly unless they were the real killer!"

Waylon Smithers: "It is.... too late for me.... little Lisa. The mob has judged you to be a killer. I just want justice for Mister Burns...."

Lisa Simpson: "I can't believe I'm going to die before I reach the third grade. I always wanted to learn vector calculus before I died...." *sobbing quietly*

Classical_hero- Lisa Simpson

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

Lisa Simpson was innocent!

Alive: 12/18


Captain Blackadder
Csargo
God Emperor
Johnhughthom
Nightbringer
pevergreen
Robbiecon
Romanic
Slashandburn Diamondeye2
TheFluffyOne
Yaropolk
Zack


Dead: 6/18

Askthepizzaguy- Charles Montgomery Burns (Innocent)
Diamondeye- Bart Simpson (Innocent)
Khazaar- Sideshow Mel (Innocent)
Death is yonder- Ned Flanders (Innocent)
Renata- Mayor "Diamond" Joe Quimby (Innocent)
Classical_hero- Lisa Simpson (Innocent)



Begin Night Four.

[Askthepizzaguy]

Night Four




Wiggum Residence



Ralph Wiggum: "I saw man with green shirt.... Man with blue suit.... and Daddy. This tastes like homework. I wish Lisa could help me."

Unknown figure, lurking in the shadows: .............

Ralph Wiggum: "It smells like burning in here. Hello killer!"

Unknown figure, lurking in the shadows: *smokes a cigar*

Ralph Wiggum: "You're ugly like a monkey! You smell like one too!"

Unknown figure, lurking in the shadows: *rolls forward on rollerskates, wielding a gun*

Ralph Wiggum: "I'm going to tell everyone who you are!"

Unknown figure, pointing gun: *pulls the trigger*




BANG.




Ralph Wiggum: "My stomach is crying tomato juice!"

Johnhughthom- Ralph Wiggum

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

Ralph Wiggum was innocent!

Alive: 11/18


Captain Blackadder
Csargo
God Emperor
Nightbringer
pevergreen
Robbiecon
Romanic
Slashandburn Diamondeye2
TheFluffyOne
Yaropolk
Zack


Dead: 7/18

Askthepizzaguy- Charles Montgomery Burns (Innocent)
Diamondeye- Bart Simpson (Innocent)
Khazaar- Sideshow Mel (Innocent)
Death is yonder- Ned Flanders (Innocent)
Renata- Mayor "Diamond" Joe Quimby (Innocent)
Classical_hero- Lisa Simpson (Innocent)
Johnhughthom- Ralph Wiggum (Innocent)


Begin Day Five.

[pevergreen]

Ach, I be:

Vote: Csargo

[Zack]

Vote: pevergreen

At best, you seem completely uninterested in finding scum.

[Askthepizzaguy]

Since I have all orders in, and this round had a delayed start due to my own bad timekeeping, let's move on to the next.






Night Five

Simpson Residence

Marge Simpson could hardly sleep. The deaths of little Lisa Simpson and little Bart Simpson played in her mind over and over again. She stood in the kitchen, chopping.... was she preparing a meal? Or was she finding comfort in the familiar, repetitive motion? No mother could possibly withstand the loss of her children, without losing control. Perhaps she had gone quietly mad.

Or perhaps, she was never sane to begin with.

A familiar cloud of smoke filled the room, tickling her nose. She continued cutting.... slicing.... chopping..... and chopping. The long, deadly blade cleaving apart vegetables and meat..... the splatter getting all over the counters, the walls, and even her face.

She looked coldly out the window, with the bloody juices dripping down her stern-looking face. A cruel smile began to form.... a wicked, insane smile.

Marge Simpson: "Never send a monkey to do a man's job."

Monkey on roller skates: Ooooh oooh ooooh AHHHHH AHHHH!!!!

Marge Simpson: "SHUT UP!"


The monkey rolled forward, and raised the revolver, pointing it at the Simpson matriarch.


Marge Simpson: "All those years.... so many years, taken from me. Ripped away.... so many dreams shattered, only to be replaced by steel bars. But inside the walls of my prison, I plotted. I spent many a night, sleepless, consumed by one desire. And that is the same desire which drives you."


The monkey looked quizzically at Marge.



Marge Simpson: "THE DESIRE FOR REVENGE!!! I was like you once. A bumbling, forgotten sidekick to that philistine who calls himself a clown. But I knew you were capable of so much more. Beneath that simian countenance lies a mind overlooked, and unappreciated in its time.... and a heart slowly twisted, darkened by years and years of neglect. It was only a matter of time.... did he spend your banana budget on booze, call girls, or did he simply gamble it all away? Did he smash you in the face with one too many pies? Or perhaps you just had enough of degrading yourself in order to make that ungrateful buffoon rich? Whatever the reason, I knew there was a breaking point, as there was for me. You wanted to get rid of him, didn't you? You wanted to.... KILL KRUSTY THE CLOWN!!!"


The monkey's cigar dropped out of his mouth, and his paw started to shake.



Marge Simpson: "I admit, I might have had a hand in pushing you over the edge.... into madness. Or should I say, what THEY call madness.... what I call it clarity. You finally saw what must be done, and you finally found the courage to do it. But, it seems, your primate brain has finally come up short. You see, everything that has transpired has done so according to my design. When you snapped and finally killed Krusty the Clown, I knew you were ready.... ready to rain destruction and carnage down upon Springfield. You and your partner!"


The monkey screeched in panic.


Marge Simpson: "Yes, I know about him, too! It was I who drove him over the edge! It was I who made him go insane! Your minds were already nothing but tightly wound strings, stretched beyond all reason, ready to snap. You have both been wronged by the people of Springfield, and you wanted to exact revenge upon them, but your feeble moralities got in the way.... I have simply made things clearer for you. Yes, my puppets, you have done for me what I've failed to do, so many times.... you've put Bart and Lisa Simpson to death. And for that, I will always be grateful."


The monkey began to sweat profusely, eyes darting back and forth, looking for an exit.



Marge Simpson: "But, my little simian friend, you've still proved to be bumbling and incompetent. You were supposed to kill them all... and you've failed to do so. Kill everyone in Springfield. Never send a monkey to do a man's job."



With a flick of her wrist, Marge Simpson sliced open the elastic bands holding her hair up. The hair billowed outward, revealing that below the blue highlights, it was red underneath.

The monkey looked on in horror to see Krusty's old nemesis.... and arguably, the craziest, most evil man in Springfield. He pointed the gun at Bob, shaking wildly....



Sideshow Bob: "FOOLS! I should have known you wouldn't be able to do this yourselves. That's why I've come back to Springfield, to personally finish the job. And I won't be needing you anymore... or your master. You've been nothing put pawns in my little game. And if you had been able to do your jobs without my help, I might have let you live. But seeing you here, now... I realize you're just in my way.

Like all the other poor players on the Springfield stage, it's time for your final curtain to fall. Good-bye.... Mister Teeny!"

*BANG!*

Sideshow Bob: "What cruel fate.... to see the queen fall at the hands of a pawn. What cruel irony.... to be foiled by my own fiendish plans.... to fall right before the finish line.... to drink from the bitter cup of defeat once more. But you listen here, monkey, and you listen well.... you'll never get out of Springfield alive.... not until every last one of them dies. And if you are successful, then my darkest dreams will have come true.... and I will still have my revenge. And if you fail, you will suffer the same fate as me. Only death will set you free.... yours, or theirs.

Mu-hu-hahaa.... Hahaa haaahahahaaa!

HAH HAAH HAAAH HAAAHH HAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!














Robbiecon- Marge Simpson

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

Marge Simpson was Sideshow Bob!

Sideshow Bob was the MAFIA MASTERMIND!

Alive: 10/18


Captain Blackadder
Csargo
God Emperor
Nightbringer
pevergreen
Romanic
Slashandburn Diamondeye2
TheFluffyOne
Yaropolk
Zack


Dead: 8/18

Askthepizzaguy- Charles Montgomery Burns (Innocent)
Diamondeye- Bart Simpson (Innocent)
Khazaar- Sideshow Mel (Innocent)
Death is yonder- Ned Flanders (Innocent)
Renata- Mayor "Diamond" Joe Quimby (Innocent)
Classical_hero- Lisa Simpson (Innocent)
Johnhughthom- Ralph Wiggum (Innocent)
Robbiecon- Sideshow Bob (MAFIA MASTERMIND)


Begin Day Six.