The Official Tanuki Tournament Thread

[Gregoshi]

The guards outside Gregoshi's headquarters scrunched their noses as the smell of urine wafted out the doorway. "Again?!", they thought, "His Lordship must have gotten news of an impending battle." Everytime Lord Gregoshi received news of the enemy approaching within 100 miles, he and his "retainers" (they retained very little) would wet themselves...which was actually preferable to their response when in battle. The guards hated being posted to the headquarters because of this. "Latrine duty" is what they called it in the barracks. In fact, they also took to referring to the latrine as the "head", which was short for "headquarters". This is the little known origin of the military term. "Changing of the guards" as also originates from Gregoshi, referring to the guards helping to change Gregoshi's soiled armour.

Battle was indeed impending. June 20th at 18:00 GMT Lord Sissykhaan and Lord Greg-GoGo-goshi will meet on the battlefield. It will be a messy affair and Gregoshi fully expects to commit seppoopoo. Stand upwind and plug your noses so you only have to see how badly we stink at this...and when I say "we", I mean "I".

<sigh> I never get to digest anything on the campaign trail...

[phonicsmonkey]

The guards outside Gregoshi's headquarters scrunched their noses as the smell of urine wafted out the doorway. "Again?!", they thought, "His Lordship must have gotten news of an impending battle." Everytime Lord Gregoshi received news of the enemy approaching within 100 miles, he and his "retainers" (they retained very little) would wet themselves...which was actually preferable to their response when in battle. The guards hated being posted to the headquarters because of this. "Latrine duty" is what they called it in the barracks. In fact, they also took to referring to the latrine as the "head", which was short for "headquarters". This is the little known origin of the military term. "Changing of the guards" as also originates from Gregoshi, referring to the guards helping to change Gregoshi's soiled armour.

Battle was indeed impending. June 20th at 18:00 GMT Lord Sissykhaan and Lord Greg-GoGo-goshi will meet on the battlefield. It will be a messy affair and Gregoshi fully expects to commit seppoopoo. Stand upwind and plug your noses so you only have to see how badly we stink at this...and when I say "we", I mean "I".

Aha, the old 'reverse smack talk' trick

[Gregoshi]

Aha, the old 'reverse smack talk' trick

No tricks. I'm not that clever and when I try to be, I lack the skills to pull them off. I've got pathetic track record in STW/MTW and my first round match with TC to back up the above urinalysis of my prospects.

[phonicsmonkey]

No tricks. I'm not that clever and when I try to be, I lack the skills to pull them off. I've got pathetic track record in STW/MTW and my first round match with TC to back up the above urinalysis of my prospects.

You are truly the master at this.

[GeneralHankerchief]

No tricks. I'm not that clever and when I try to be, I lack the skills to pull them off. I've got pathetic track record in STW/MTW and my first round match with TC to back up the above urinalysis of my prospects.

My challenge stands for whichever one of you two loses. We'll see if you can back up your reverse smack-talk against a true champion of suckitude.

[Gregoshi]

'khaan and I met on the field of battle and he emerged victorious 3-0. Battles included a classic rout, an all-rocket rout and a ninja/night/fog rout. We had to re-do the ninja rout because he didn't know how to increase the rank of his units so my army of rank 5+ ninjas trounced his rank 1 ninjas. After explaining how to increase the unit rank, we re-fought the battle and achieved the expected result. My surviving ninjas are trying out for the track team tomorrow.

Congratulations 'khaan and good luck in your re-match(!!!) with Monk.

[phonicsmonkey]

Hmmm, looks like some form on the other side of the losers' draw. I'll have to keep a close eye on the 'khaan vs Monk match.

But first I have to defeat the Flying Finn.

He had to go to Ikea yesterday so we couldn't fight but maybe tonight will work better unless he is up to his neck in wooden dowels and multitudinous screws of different sizes....