The Thing Mafia [Concluded]

[TinCow]

Night 1

The henchperson was not enamored with the role they had been given. It wasn't supposed to be like this. Henching was an old and honorable profession; spies were to be tortured, gold bars were to be stolen, damsels were to be strapped to train tracks. And yet here they were in Antarctica, chipping frozen Norwegian viscera off a wall. It was, really, quite annoying. What did Kage and CR know about true evil, anyway? All they'd ever done was kill a few dozen people in some bizarre town called the Frontroom. That wasn't evil, that was just mean. Evil, real evil, was...

"Ah, sorry... didn't mean to interrupt your internal monologue."

The henchperson turned around. A short ways down the hallway was another henchperson in an orange jumpsuit. Typical. So typical of this ramshackle, unprofessional organization. The cleaner got annoyed. "You know, you really should take our orders a little more seriously. Kage and CR said we should work separately and clean this place with sufficient distance to prevent anyone from even hearing another person, let alone seeing. And yet, here you are, standing right in front of me. I know these instructions are idiotic, but what do you think those fools will do to us if they find out we were this close to one another?"

The interloper blushed a bit. "Sorry, I suppose this has caused something of an awkward situation." There was an uncomfortable silence, eventually broken by the newcomer. "Oh, I know! I can fix this! I can!"

The henchperson raised an eyebrow skeptically. "Really, and how exactly do you propose to do that?"

The interloper's face became thoughtful for a moment, then a look of excitement crossed their face. "I've got it! I do!" They nodded eagerly.

"Yes?" said the henchperson, "what stupid idea are you going to tell me now?"

"Ok, bear with me," began the interloper. "Now, bear with me here, this is just a theory. I was thinking... maybe... well, how about I just detach my spider-head, have it dissect you, and spread your organs all over the walls?"

The henchperson frowned. "Yes, I suppose that would solve the problem."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Several hours later, the henchpersons gathered in the main lounge. Kage and CR were present, and they were not happy. CR began lecturing. "What kind of an amateur-hour crew is this? We specifically told you to clean up all the gore, both frozen and fresh, yet we wake up this morning to find plenty of fresh gore in hallway 7B. That is not acceptable."

"It is unacceptable," echoed Kage, a martini in his hand. "Plus, some of these bits of goo are really large. Seriously, how could you have missed this thing?" He held up Bertha's head. "Really? You couldn't even put it in a trash bag or something?"

"Unacceptable," repeated CR. "You must be punished." His eyes narrowed for a moment, then widened. "Hey, Kage, what was that thing the stupid townies used to do back in the frontroom."

Kage was drinking his martini; he held up a finger, indicating he'd answer in a moment, then downed the thing. After wiping his mouth, he responded. "Lynching. The stupid townies lynched each other to solve problems."

CR grinned. "Yes! That's what it was! Lynching! You," he pointed at the henchpersons, "shall lynch one of yourselves as punishment for the failure to clean up Bertha's unsightly remains. Make it quick, because tonight we want you to get to work on construction of the nuclear reactor and the bowling alley."

"Not necessarily in that order," added Kage.

Day 1 will end in:


Alive: (16/17)
[MAFIA] Bobby
[MAFIA] Bugsy
[MAFIA] Emilio
[MAFIA] Fat Tony
[MAFIA] Frank
[MAFIA] Johnny
[MAFIA] Luciano
[MAFIA] Luigi
[MAFIA] Nick
[MAFIA] Paulie
[MAFIA] Rocco
[MAFIA] Salvatore
[MAFIA] Silvio
[MAFIA] Sonny
[MAFIA] Vinny
[MAFIA] Vito

Killed:
[MAFIA] Bertha (N1)