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Thread: Women, know your limits

  1. 08-25-2011, 02:08 #61
    InsaneApache
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    Default Re: Women, know your limits

    Element: Woman

    Symbol: Wo

    Discoverer: Adam

    Atomic Mass: Accepted as 55kg but known to vary from 45kg to 225kg

    Occurrence: Found in large quantities in urban areas, with trace elements in outlying areas

    Physical Properties: Boils at absolutely nothing, freezes for no apparent reason, melts if given special treatment, bitter if used incorrectly

    Chemical Properties: Affinity to Gold, Silver, Platinum and all precious stones. The most powerful money reducing agent known to man

    Common Use: Highly ornamental, especially in sports cars. Can be a very effective cleaning agent

    Hazards: Highly dangerous except in experienced hands. Illegal to possess more than one, although several can be maintained at different locations as long as specimens do not come into direct contact with each other.

    There are times I wish they’d just ban everything- baccy and beer, burgers and bangers, and all the rest- once and for all. Instead, they creep forward one apparently tiny step at a time. It’s like being executed with a bacon slicer.

    “Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it whether it exists or not, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedy.”

    To learn who rules over you, simply find out who you are not allowed to criticise.

    "The purpose of a university education for Left / Liberals is to attain all the politically correct attitudes towards minorties, and the financial means to live as far away from them as possible."
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  2. 08-25-2011, 16:50 #62
    Strike For The South
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    Default Re: Women, know your limits

    I lold

    Most women are considerd funny only becuase they are pretty

    A great example is Cheslea Handler. I've been a borderline alcoholic trying to fill the absolute emotional void in my soul with strange sexual encounters for years now and no one has even thought to give me a radio spot
    There, but for the grace of God, goes John Bradford

    My aim, then, was to whip the rebels, to humble their pride, to follow them to their inmost recesses, and make them fear and dread us. Fear is the beginning of wisdom.

    I am tired and sick of war. Its glory is all moonshine. It is only those who have neither fired a shot nor heard the shrieks and groans of the wounded who cry aloud for blood, for vengeance, for desolation.
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  3. 08-25-2011, 17:55 #63
    Fragony
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    Default Re: Women, know your limits

    Quote Originally Posted by Strike For The South View Post
    I lold

    Most women are considerd funny only becuase they are pretty

    A great example is Cheslea Handler. I've been a borderline alcoholic trying to fill the absolute emotional void in my soul with strange sexual encounters for years now and no one has even thought to give me a radio spot
    Don't be so hard on yourself, you probably would have been terrible.
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  4. 08-25-2011, 18:10 #64
    Strike For The South
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    Default Re: Women, know your limits

    Quote Originally Posted by Fragony View Post
    Don't be so hard on yourself, you probably would have been terrible.
    That's what the all tell me afterwards

    BA-ZING
    There, but for the grace of God, goes John Bradford

    My aim, then, was to whip the rebels, to humble their pride, to follow them to their inmost recesses, and make them fear and dread us. Fear is the beginning of wisdom.

    I am tired and sick of war. Its glory is all moonshine. It is only those who have neither fired a shot nor heard the shrieks and groans of the wounded who cry aloud for blood, for vengeance, for desolation.
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  5. 08-25-2011, 18:17 #65
    Fragony
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    Default Re: Women, know your limits

    Quote Originally Posted by Strike For The South View Post
    That's what the all tell me afterwards

    BA-ZING
    Who is that Ba Zing and what makes him so good, find it out
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  6. 08-25-2011, 18:24 #66
    Pannonian
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    Default Re: Women, know your limits

    Quote Originally Posted by InsaneApache View Post
    Plenty of funny women.

    In the past.

    Hattie Jacques. Joyce Grenfell. Lucille Ball.

    More up to date.

    Jennifer Saunders in Ab Fab. To coin a phrase, brilliant.

    Caroline Aherne in everything she's done. Scorchio.

    A couple of examples.
    I quite liked Josie Lawrence in Whose Line.
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  7. 08-26-2011, 00:56 #67
    Seamus Fermanagh
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    Default Re: Women, know your limits

    Good to see you again Pannonian! If you get any time off elsewhere, you are always welcome here (and in Fatlington).
    "The only way that has ever been discovered to have a lot of people cooperate together voluntarily is through the free market. And that's why it's so essential to preserving individual freedom.” -- Milton Friedman

    "The urge to save humanity is almost always a false front for the urge to rule." -- H. L. Mencken
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