Will there be a change in a woman's preference on how a man should be?

[Shaka_Khan]

Women have told me that they prefer a man who is intelligent. At the same time, they want a man who isn't arrogant. They want a guy to be humorous, which can get confusing for us guys when trying to balance out the three. A guy needs to be healthy too.

I was told that a woman prefers an intelligent man because she seeks a man who could take care of her and could pass on good genes to their children. This has been ingrained in a woman's mind from generation to generation. Is it just me or do you guys don't emphasize a woman's intellect as much as a woman does to a man? From what I've seen, I can't imagine a woman falling in love with the character whom Ashton Kutcher acted as in That '70s Show, but I certainly know a lot of men who'd date/marry a female equivalent.

What if that woman's need disappears? What if more and more women gain powerful positions? I think more and more women would no longer feel the need to marry a guy who is more intelligent, older and wealthier than herself. I know of one successful woman who said that she'd marry a younger guy whose style she could change if she wants to. Another woman somewhat like her is my older cousin who came from a wealthy family. She married a guy who wasn't wealthy. She was mainly attracted to her looks. I think she plays the dominant role because of the wealth that her parents give her. She controls the money management of the couple, tries to control what friends her man should hang around with, and even controls what hairstyle her husband should have. This guy isn't weak and submissive to the others.

I could see more and more women think less about a man's intellect and wealth in the future.

[Beskar]

I really like Intelligent women, I find it an attractive trait.

But I think some people try to seperate men and women as if they are a completely separate species. It really isn't the case. Men and women are identical yet there is some social stigma/norms which are placed upon them which bizarrely could make the same person as a male and as a female "completely different" in how they are viewed.

For example, think of the male/female dumbgoodlooking ones, and the male/female nerdyones. They are essentially the same, just viewed from different angles.

[Papewaio]

The hormones in our body bathe the brain and have an effect on how we feel and what we are attracted to.

Good looking is linked to disease resistance. Sexual appetite and energy is linked to health.

The ability of a guy to provide a nest is an important trait too.

So if a woman has her own nest she can select on the healthy traits over the nest.

Intelligence in a knowledge economy is linked to wealth.

Apparently women are attracted to different attributes based on cycle and if they are using the pill.

Guys are attracted on a more steady level... But change in testosterone levels does change a guys fixation levels.

Also apparently we are most attracted to people who smell differen to us... Increased disease resistance.

[Husar]

I wouldn't know, I'm apparently too poor to afford an intelligent woman.

[Andres]

I wouldn't know, I'm apparently too poor to afford an intelligent woman.

They sometimes sell high quality products at cheap prices in the local Aldi.

[Husar]

They sometimes sell high quality products at cheap prices in the local Aldi.

I'm more concerned about the running costs.
People keep telling me I have to invest continuously in a girlfriend, if I want to keep it.

[Philippus Flavius Homovallumus]

Women have told me that they prefer a man who is intelligent. At the same time, they want a man who isn't arrogant. They want a guy to be humorous, which can get confusing for us guys when trying to balance out the three. A guy needs to be healthy too.

I was told that a woman prefers an intelligent man because she seeks a man who could take care of her and could pass on good genes to their children. This has been ingrained in a woman's mind from generation to generation. Is it just me or do you guys don't emphasize a woman's intellect as much as a woman does to a man? From what I've seen, I can't imagine a woman falling in love with the character whom Ashton Kutcher acted as in That '70s Show, but I certainly know a lot of men who'd date/marry a female equivalent.

What if that woman's need disappears? What if more and more women gain powerful positions? I think more and more women would no longer feel the need to marry a guy who is more intelligent, older and wealthier than herself. I know of one successful woman who said that she'd marry a younger guy whose style she could change if she wants to. Another woman somewhat like her is my older cousin who came from a wealthy family. She married a guy who wasn't wealthy. She was mainly attracted to her looks. I think she plays the dominant role because of the wealth that her parents give her. She controls the money management of the couple, tries to control what friends her man should hang around with, and even controls what hairstyle her husband should have. This guy isn't weak and submissive to the others.

I could see more and more women think less about a man's intellect and wealth in the future.

There is some evidence that more successful women raise the bar, which makes sense because however much you make you will have to take some time off for having children and your partner needs to be able to take up the economic slack to maintain your lifestyle.

Your older cousin sounds not unusual, my mother has always controlled the money (my father has no bank card) but she does not earn the majority of it. On the other hand, if she's trying to control who he associates with, he is clearly under her thumb and somewhat weak willed if he puts up with that.

I really like Intelligent women, I find it an attractive trait.

So do I, especially ones who are gue with me, and are feminists.

But I think some people try to seperate men and women as if they are a completely separate species. It really isn't the case. Men and women are identical yet there is some social stigma/norms which are placed upon them which bizarrely could make the same person as a male and as a female "completely different" in how they are viewed.

My and women are not a seperate species, but they do have fundamentally different ways of viewing the world, and that is true accross cultures. Putting that down to "stigma" is unreasonable, because it assumes that the supposed sexism arose in a vacume, rather than as a reflection of our genuine sexual asymetry.

For example, think of the male/female dumbgoodlooking ones, and the male/female nerdyones. They are essentially the same, just viewed from different angles.

Not really, the female nerd is a different beast. Not only is she usually attractive, because the nerdy in a man is cute in a girl, but unlike the male nerd she doesn't consider "nerding it up" to be a good date.

The male "nerd" is just an intelligent man who isn't any good at being a "man", because as soon as you demonstrate "manliness" you cease to be a nerd, while the female nerd is perfectly feminine to begin with, she just pretends to be less nerdy for the sake of her boyfriend.

[Beskar]

My and women are not a seperate species, but they do have fundamentally different ways of viewing the world, and that is true accross cultures. Putting that down to "stigma" is unreasonable, because it assumes that the supposed sexism arose in a vacume, rather than as a reflection of our genuine sexual asymetry.

Reminds me of a study where there was a class full of children and they decided to split the class based on eye colour with blue eyes being better than brown eyes, then they observed the effects. Within the matter of hours, the divide between the pupils grew, with the blue eyed ones acting 'superior' over the brown eye ones. Differences in stereotypes began to form as well. So kids who had no idea of the differences suddenly became very aware and salient of them.

If you have a bunch of young children, males and females and have them together with no clear indication or differing treatment, they are virtually identical.

Yes, later on, hormones can play a big role in tempering with individuals emotions and feelings, so on the fundamental broad level, there is no clear dividing difference.

[Shaka_Khan]

Yes, later on, hormones can play a big role in tempering with individuals emotions and feelings, so on the fundamental broad level, there is no clear dividing difference.

We weren't talking as if a man and a woman were different species.

[Papewaio]

We weren't talking as if a man and a woman were different species.

I wouldn't be surprised that there is a greater differentiation between X & Y chromosomes then any other pair ie there is a bigger step difference between man and woman then Chinese and European.

After all sexes predates ethnic groups.

[CountArach]

Not really, the female nerd is a different beast. Not only is she usually attractive, because the nerdy in a man is cute in a girl, but unlike the male nerd she doesn't consider "nerding it up" to be a good date.

The male "nerd" is just an intelligent man who isn't any good at being a "man", because as soon as you demonstrate "manliness" you cease to be a nerd, while the female nerd is perfectly feminine to begin with, she just pretends to be less nerdy for the sake of her boyfriend.

Nothing at all like my life and several other people that I know. What are you basing that on?

[rvg]

Women want a man who is rich. Other stuff can be a plus but it's mostly just fluff overshadowed by money.

[Philippus Flavius Homovallumus]

Reminds me of a study where there was a class full of children and they decided to split the class based on eye colour with blue eyes being better than brown eyes, then they observed the effects. Within the matter of hours, the divide between the pupils grew, with the blue eyed ones acting 'superior' over the brown eye ones. Differences in stereotypes began to form as well. So kids who had no idea of the differences suddenly became very aware and salient of them.

If you have a bunch of young children, males and females and have them together with no clear indication or differing treatment, they are virtually identical.

Yes, later on, hormones can play a big role in tempering with individuals emotions and feelings, so on the fundamental broad level, there is no clear dividing difference.

What about the study with the male and female chimpanzees, where the male children automatically played with the cars, and the females the dolls?

What about the case of the boy who had his penis burned off and was raised as a girl, which was a complete failure even prior to puberty, and he subsequently committed suicide?

Racism and sexism are not similar prejudices.

Gender is real.

Nothing at all like my life and several other people that I know. What are you basing that on?

Oh, you have girls who are outwardly "nerdy", certainly, and even ones who consider dungeon crawling in D&D Online a great date, but consider the example of "chick lit". How much of that stuff is fantasy with conplex underlying mythology, it's not just Twilight that's like that, there was True Blood too, any plenty of other examples. Look at the films targeted at teenagers and young women vs those targeted at young men.

Hell, look at the TV being produced these days, how much of the Sci-Fi/Fantasy strand is targeted at young women specifically?

[rory_20_uk]

Women want two things:

They want a man with low testosterone who won't stray, with a good job and who is good with children. A provider and a nurcherer.
They want a man with a high testosterone to screw their brains out and get them their children.

So, ideally they want the former to look after the children of the latter.

Women aren't shallow, oh no. They just like men who buy them things. Shiny things. Expensive things. It's not that they want these things per se, it's just that it is a fantastic surrogate marker to assess how much the man cares.
They are not obsessed by money. Of course not. They just don't like men without drive or ambition or intelligence. Things that just happen to lead to, erm, material possessions.

Apparently women over time to have different preferences in men, which helps ensure genetic drift in the species which keeps it heathy. Unlike the social system which encourages reverse darwinism.

[Ironside]

What about the study with the male and female chimpanzees, where the male children automatically played with the cars, and the females the dolls?

What about the case of the boy who had his penis burned off and was raised as a girl, which was a complete failure even prior to puberty, and he subsequently committed suicide?

Racism and sexism are not similar prejudices.

Gender is real.

So is subpopulations (aka race). The thing is how close they are on the scale, how they overlap and how to deal with it. Pretty much every list with girls do that and boys do that will both have significant exceptions and may very well be a pure cultural construction (boys don't cry is one example of that).

So sure gender does exist, but it's worth remembering that what girls wants doesn't say much on what girl A wants.