Quote Originally Posted by Alexander the Pretty Good
Holy cow this is fun. I'm playing Ulster as my first campaign, I'm on my second Count, a 19 diplomacy ~15 steward just/gregarious/kind total coward (craven). His wife is 15 diplo 10 steward and the heir to a near by (but not neighboring) county (her dad had a rebellion and is now a Cathar heretic). Not sure what happens when he kicks the bucket - I assume I end up having control over it, right?
If your wife inherits then she will become a landed character, as in she'll rule from that county and have her own court, ect. You won't get the county but if you've been popping out children there's a good bet your number one heir will get her county along with inheriting everything you have. Unless you're running gravelkind succession in which case it's a bit more complicated.

Anyway, I forged a claim on Tyrone and I'm building up my levy buildings to get a healthy lead over them, but it's slow going. I'm also worried about giving my marshal troops - he's level 12 mil but he's my brother and a pretender to the throne. With my diplomatic super powers he's only ~-30 relations. Can he steal my troops to seize the throne?
No nothing like that. He cannot steal your troops while in command of them. But there's nothing stoping him from using his own personal levies when/if he rebels. In fact, putting guys who hate you at the head of weak armies is a good way of getting them killed and removing them as a threat. Provided you can spare the loss of the men who die with them, of course.

Glad to hear you're enjoying yourself