You can reduce your feudal laws and increase your Noble Customs tech, each will give small boons. The laws can then be moved up again once you've dealt with the problems.
Also use your family. When reassigning lands and titles favour your unlanded cousins, etc. they will have a dynasty bonus of +25 (I think?). And be vigilant with unmarried vassals, these are prime opportunities to marry your non-heir children into noble houses to end their lines and bring their lands into your dynasty.
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