What to do when attraction runs dry...

[PanzerJaeger]

Hypothetically, you are __________ with your partner.

Compatible - yes.
Comfortable - yes.
Trusting - yes.
Financially invested - yes.
Emotionally invested - yes.
Sexually attracted - no.

Do you stay or go?

[Moros]

Do you feel like going or do you feel like staying? Isn't that the simple determining factor. Don't we just usually make these thing out to be more complicated than they really are?

[Kagemusha]

You are the only person with the answer for your question.

[Ronin]

Hypothetically, you are __________ with your partner.

Compatible - yes.
Comfortable - yes.
Trusting - yes.
Financially invested - yes.
Emotionally invested - yes.
Sexually attracted - no.

Do you stay or go?

except for the financial investment, that's the description of a friend...not a mate....go.

[The Stranger]

get a lover!

[Philippus Flavius Homovallumus]

Hypothetically, you are __________ with your partner.

Compatible - yes.
Comfortable - yes.
Trusting - yes.
Financially invested - yes.
Emotionally invested - yes.
Sexually attracted - no.

Do you stay or go?

The key question is "was it there before"

If it's gone, then it can come back, if it was never there then you're wasting your time.

If it has just gone walk about I would think it would be worth talking about it with said partner.

[a completely inoffensive name]

Hypothetically, you are __________ with your partner.

Compatible - yes.
Comfortable - yes.
Trusting - yes.
Financially invested - yes.
Emotionally invested - yes.
Sexually attracted - no.

Do you stay or go?

How can you even say for sure you are not sexually attracted if you haven't even tried out nipple clamps in the bedroom?

[PanzerJaeger]

How can you even say for sure you are not sexually attracted if you haven't even tried out nipple clamps in the bedroom?

Who says that hasn't happened?

[a completely inoffensive name]

Who says that hasn't happened?

My home videos....errr, I mean, intuition.

Have you....you know....had her massage the "male g-spot" if you know what I mean?

[Strike For The South]

dude, sex is the easy part.

Just remember what first attracted you to that person, do not force the intercourse. Sex will happen

You check off boxes most young couples are 5-10 years away from checking off

Of course, if you feel the spark can not be reconciled, leave. But you asking the question makes me feel otherwise

[Major Robert Dump]

I think it depends on the sexual attraction to begin with, why it was lost, and what can be done to bring it back, and/or if the parties are willing to do it.

Is it physical, or an emotional thing?

If this can be solved by some time on the treadmill then it is honestly best to be forthcoming but tactful. If it is the result of a personality change it is much more complicated. For example, I lost interest in a woman once when I found out that she listened to Rush.

[Vladimir]

Give me her phone number and I'll spare you the dilemma.

[Beskar]

There is far more to a partner than just sexual attraction. If that last point is so critical to you constantly, then are you really ready to settle down?

Sex comes and goes, but having that intimate deep loving relationship with some one cannot be replaced. I had so many of your other choices being "No" 's, that I would gladly swap them for some one I didn't find sexually attractive. To make it move easier to answer, I will simply put it this way.

Do you love them?

If answer is yes, stay. If answer is no, go.

[Fragony]

What's with the 'she' he said partner

[TinCow]

If you are not sexually attracted to your partner, you probably need to end the relationship. Sex is an incredibly important part of any long-term relationship, and few things cause more problems than when partners do not fulfill each others' sexual needs. At best, one person ends up very sexually frustrated, and at worst it results in outright resentment and extramarital affairs. The only reason to remain in a relationship with someone you are not sexually attracted to is (1) they are not sexually attracted to you either and (2) sexuality is truly unimportant to both of you. If both of these criteria are met, it is theoretically possible to remain in a fulfilling relationship. However, this is extremely rare and tends to only happen when people have low sexual interest for biological reasons (such as age or disability). In addition, #2 is extremely hard to determine, because it is a difficult topic to have an honest conversation about. In any case, do not remain in the relationship unless you are willing to sit the other person down and tell them that you are not sexually attracted to them. If you are unwilling to have this conversation, regardless of the reason, you need to end it.

[Centurion1]

Pj I thought you were asexual or used gun barrels.... My world is changing far too much around me

[Peasant Phill]

Sexual frustration can lead to a lot of problems in an otherwise good relationship. I'm not saying that it may not work out but speaking from experience, it's something that can poison the entire relationship.

[Lemur]

What do you do?

[stratigos vasilios]

May I ask a more personal question? You said you are emotionally and financially invested, are you children invested too? That would be quite a critical factor that cannot be ignored.

Attraction can come in waves, sometimes you might think that you'll never be attracted to the same person ever again but then they might do something that triggers a response (both emotionally and literally...) and you might find them sexually attractive once more. I wouldn't imagine ending a relationship just because you're no longer sexually attracted to your partner (or vice versa) is necessary, especially since you're heavily invested together in other aspects. You can always discuss the 'fading' attraction and try and trigger some extra romance or spice into your routine, this might trigger a re-attraction feeling.

[Centurion1]

May I ask a more personal question? You said you are emotionally and financially invested, are you children invested too? That would be quite a critical factor that cannot be ignored.

Attraction can come in waves, sometimes you might think that you'll never be attracted to the same person ever again but then they might do something that triggers a response (both emotionally and literally...) and you might find them sexually attractive once more. I wouldn't imagine ending a relationship just because you're no longer sexually attracted to your partner (or vice versa) is necessary, especially since you're heavily invested together in other aspects. You can always discuss the 'fading' attraction and try and trigger some extra romance or spice into your routine, this might trigger a re-attraction feeling.

im 99% sure panzer doesnt have children though i would let him answer that.

a very good point though. staying together for the kids is in my opinion quite noble. unless your spouse is abusive obviously.

[stratigos vasilios]

Yeah absolutely, a friend of mines parents split up as soon as he finished high school exams. Unfortunately he was a bit blindsided and it hit him like a ton of bricks, but supposedly they'd be semi-split for a year with the agreement to tell him after the stressful exams so he could keep focused.

[a completely inoffensive name]

Why is PJ so late with updates on his personal life, it's very rude to keep people waiting on facts about your intimacy with a woman.

[stratigos vasilios]

He never said a 'woman'... not that it matters

[Centurion1]

Oh just for my reasoned and mature opinion. I'm 20 so

A. I'm sexually attracted to the
Vast majority of the female population.

B. if im not sexually attracted to something I probably won't even be with them I don't even know what those other words you Used in the op mean.

On a more serious note I got out of a pretty long term relationship in October. The sexual attraction was definitely dimming for her and my Level of attraction was dimming as well. I wanted sex obviously but it wasn't like WOW to be with her anymore which I think made me more lazy In bed. So try to recapture it but I don't know how. If there are things you
Haven't tried in bed yet try them.... I was cursed by having done most of what interested me already. Meh for the best she s a crazy *** *****

[Fragony]

It's like pizza, a bad pizza is better than no pizza

[a completely inoffensive name]

I have been with the same girl for over two years now. I abhor sex as a way of enjoying myself, I have sex because it makes me feel closer to my girl and it feels good in the process.

Call me a traditionalist but whatevs. I like reading and thinking alone than sex with others.

[Peasant Phill]

... I like reading and thinking alone than sex with others.

I'm probably reading to much into this.

[Visor]

I'm probably reading to much into this.

Too much ASOIAF?

[Peasant Phill]

Too much ASOIAF?

No, more in the since of: A dirty mind is a joy forever.

[rajpoot]

I'm probably reading to much into this.

Oh we've seen ACIN's reading list in that contest. I don't think he reads what you think he reads.
That is if you think he reads what I think you're thinking he reads.