Bird mafia [Concluded]

[Askthepizzaguy]

Day Seven


Ok so let's get down to the nitty gritty write away. It would seem some of you are impatient for your own demise. We'll get to that as the first order of business.

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However, ghost-pigeon wonders if anyone will even read this narration. So, for those of you who skip to the bottom, narration reveal may be false. Bird laughs out loud.

So, let's take a look at this Bird you say is guilty of murdering other Birds.

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Wow. I was not ready for that. You one goofy lookin' Bird, "quetzack". You not one of those. What are you, anyway?

Google says this "Great Potoo". What a ridiculous looking bird. Seriously. I don't know if Bird could get any goofier looking.

Did you know you are the lynch today?

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Yep, that's right! Don't look so surprised. You've known about it for hours. Even complained it was coming too slowly for quetzack. Don't worry though, narrator ghost pigeon can cure you of all your ills.

But let me ask you question, Bird. When you saw you were going to be the lynchee today, what was your reaction? Were you surprised, disappointed? What was the exact expression on your face, after all the hard work you put into this game?

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Yeah, I'd be puzzled too. My god, you're a goofy looking .

Seriously, I can't get over it. Anyway.

Cat is coming to eat you, Bird. And Cat is very hungry, depite being full of birds already. Maybe Cat just want to play with your goofy looking face and bat you around for a while. Would you like that, goofy Bird?

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No!? No!??!? Well, you knew this was a possible outcome. Personally, I blame Double A. It must be all his fault. Or perhaps Edse, I guess. It's probably both.

But i think my favorite moment was when turtle doves both died during a lynch. Lawl, lover masons. Partly their fault for not being here / claiming, partly other Birds fault for lynching them to begin with. But let's not go around assigning blame for this disaster. After all, is possible you, goofy-looking Bird, are actually a Dog!

Yes! Possible! Birds too dumb to tell difference between Bird and Dog all this time in the narration. Why would today be any different? At least they find Hawkerchief, although to be fair, he was howling. And literally admitted to being scum.

So, it's not like anyone did a fantastic job here. But the moment of truth is coming. When Cat eats Bird, we will find out of Bird is actually Bird, or if dog will run away and stop pretending to be Bird, because Dog does not like evil Cat. Or something.

This plot too convoluted for me. Why do dogs have human hands, again? Shut up, internal monologue! Nobody likes you.

Cat is coming! Get ready, 'Quetzack', for you are about to meet your birdly lord. Any final words? Oh that's right, you Bird. You don't have any words. Laff.

Cat pounces!

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Oh... oh my Bird. Look at your face! Look at that wide-eyed, sympathetic looking face!

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You're even uglier and goofier looking when you're trying to be cute. But let's see what Cat thinks of your desperation maneuver.

Cat has taken a look at your big Disney eyes, and has reconsidered his position on the matter of eating your face.

Hmmm....

Thinking carefully.

Considers eating Edseedsnipe for sniping and switching vote at the last minutes, because this is scummy. But the Doubleday's hummingbird thing also appetizing and skipped most of final day, could be scummier.

But wait! Cat is merely narrative element! Cat has no choice in the matter! Cat eats your face, Bird!

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Zack was eaten by the Cat. Zack was Great Potoo, a vanilla and seriously goofy-looking fricking Bird. Everyone laugh at the goofy-looking bird pictures. Makes up for choppy grammar and overall plot weakness, which was a choice by the narrator he doesn't even begin to regret because it's still funny.

But wait, didn't narrator hint that he was maybe lying about this reveal?

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That also a lie. Cat turned around and mauled the other Bird, who was revealed to be....



....

That not very goofy-looking Bird. Must be cover role or something. Not really that funny. Bird demands refund.

Oh wait, Google says this is "titicaca grebe".

WHAT A FUNNY NAME FOR A BIRD! And is also a stupid flightless Bird. So many dumb birds can't get away. No wonder so many are endangered. Oh, I have an idea, I'll be a bird, except I can't fly.

Birds are stupid! That's the moral of story. Next time you see Bird, point and laugh at Bird. After all, they pooped on Pizza's car.

Is not sports car, but still, goopy poopies on windshield smear all over the place and is gross. Dumb birds.

Which leave only one "bird" standing. He must be the Bird Mafia, which is really Dog. With human hands.

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You bad at Photoshop, Pizza pigeon.

Actually, MS paint. But dog's face really goofy and thought it would be funny if the Bird mafia had stupid dog faces.

And now, the grand finale! This is the team which won the game!

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Edse survived and massacred all the Birds. Why? Because is Dog. And Dog likes to hunt birds. And if Dog had Tommy Gun, you better believe it would shoot every Bird it would see, and bark at their remains. Because maybe then, can drag shattered Bird corpse back home to Master and get pat on head and doggy treat.

Dog just want Master's approval, after all. See, Dog not so bad, really. Would murder ruthlessly just to win approval from their lord and master. No wonder why Dog is Man's best friend. This something both species have in common. *grumble, grumble.*

Well that's a depressing note to end on.

Once again, here is face of goofy fricking Bird.

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HAHAHA! What a goofy-looking Bird.

OK I feel better now. At least we not look like that Bird. What an unfortunate fate.

And this means that, in all truthfulness,

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THE BIRD MAFIA HAVE WON THE GAME!

CONGRATULATIONS, GENERALHANKERCHIEF AND EDSE!!!


And yes, this is the real ending.

Not have time or energy to bother with fake reveal.

Thank you everyone for playing! Hope you had fun! Here is silly chicken dance song that went unused this game: