Quote Originally Posted by zelda12
Plus I leave all the critiquing buisness to Ludens and Axeknight as they're a lot better at it than me.
Thanks for the compliment, but it is not true. I haven't seen you criticize often, but when you do you always have a good point.

Quote Originally Posted by frogbeastegg
Ludens, the swinging perspective was the only way the scene could ever be done. I've known that for a long time; that's the scene I was talking about way back when they were in John's castle, the scene where I said I had to do dual POVs and get it working. Working it like most of the other scenes where you only get the odd thought from both characters wouldn't work; it had to be the in-depth version of both characters. I didn't find it to be a problem, reading or writing, but then I'm in a unique position here. I've seen some books I enjoyed do the same thing; I guess it depends on how you identify with the characters. I think we said before that we tend to work a bit differently as readers, didn’t we? You tend to latch on to one or two characters in great detail whereas I prefer to swing between several characters in slightly less detail, if I recall correctly.
I am still not convinced that either that scene or the one in the abbey couldn't be done otherwise. I've actually been trying to redo them in my mind .

Point is: I don't necessarily need few characters to enjoy a story, but I want to have them thoroughly separated. And the swinging perspective does not help that. It is also a standard thing literary nit-picks will complain about .

Ugh, I am too tired to do any decent commenting. I will just say that I really liked the last part.

:starts dreaming about a alternative version of the story where Fulk is locked up for ten years before he escapes and plots his bloody revenge on Trempwick: