"OMG I just watched [Insert Hollywood-made film name] and they showed a [Insert strange description here]. That would make a perfect unit for the [insert faction here]"
Re: Handy Dandy Bitch Thread
"OMG I just watched [Insert Hollywood-made film name] and they showed a [Insert strange description here]. That would make a perfect unit for the [insert faction here]"
"A man may fight for many things: his country, his principles, his friends, the glistening tear on the cheek of a golden child. But personally, I'd mudwrestle my own mother for a ton of cash, an amusing clock and a stack of French porn."
- Edmund Blackadder
Re: Handy Dandy Bitch Thread
Sheesh! Where this one:
"Why can't I play as the [Insert any of non-Roman factions all of which are cooler than Rome any way, (execpt for Egypt)]? GAHHHH!" :goes around gnawing random things rabidly:
Or,
"this games sux. i don't know what a rome is! and what is a [insert the name of a unit any idiot would know by name]? pigs are rox!"
"But if you should fall you fall alone,
If you should stand then who's to guide you?
If I knew the way I would take you home."
Grateful Dead, "Ripple"
Re: Handy Dandy Bitch Thread
And not to forget:
"ppl wut r codz i need cuz these spear dudz keep killing my dudz so how do i [insert name of foolish RTS function] cuz i cant loze cause i'm l33t".
"This is supposed to be a happy occasion. Let's not bicker and argue over who killed who."
Re: Handy Dandy Bitch Thread
"I hate CA! Why can't they release a version for computers that have [insert name of a device that is not a CD drive but kinda like a floppy drive] and not a CD drive !??!? They must hate the community!"
"I wanna play the [insert name of a random, Galactic Battlegrounds civilization] instead of Rome!!! Where are they???"
"I find the lack of the [insert name of lack of obscure ethnic tribe now long extinct] to be highly insulting!!! Those [insert profanities] bigots at CA!!!"
Great thread!
[Insert compliemts here]
(Woops, got carried away)
Re: Handy Dandy Bitch Thread
"OMG why does the [insert faction] have the [insert strange unit]? Everybody knows the [insert another faction that doesn't even appear in the game] had them..."
You may not care about war, but war cares about you!
Re: Handy Dandy Bitch Thread
Why is [insert unit type here] so crap!? back in [STW/MTW/both] they were great and I used them a lot. Is this game bugged or are CA just messing with us vets? This crap makes me want to [mod it/scream for a patch/throw game away in disgust]
This game is racist because [insert unit here] is [crap/uber/not available/dorky] I'm going to [sue CA/go to the press/melt my CDs over a red hot flame in protest]
Um, this is an embarrassing question since I'm a vet but [how do I trade/get this unit/use this function] I swear CA are doing this to [annoy me/play with my mind/make my life hard/destroy the good name of TW] I never had this problem with the other TW games, RTW is so [badly thought out/different/:insert funny smiley here:]
Frogbeastegg's Guide to Total War: Shogun II. Please note that the guide is not up-to-date for the latest patch.
Re: Handy Dandy Bitch Thread
LOL!
Gil and I have just spent a happy five minutes giggling like loons at this thread. Thanks muchly for the happiness boost.
Gentlemen should exercise caution and wear stout-sided boots when using the Fintry-Kyle Escape Apparatus. Ladies, children, servants and those of a nervous disposition should be strongly encouraged to seek other means of hurried egress.
The formal bit: Any views or opinions expressed here are those of the poster and do not necessarily represent the views or opinions of The Creative Assembly or SEGA.
Re: Handy Dandy Bitch Thread
Personally, I think this is a great thread. Nothing better to create humility than poking fun at yourself. And that's what it's doing. And--from past experience--each of the "bitches" will pop up at some time in the future. We already know that. LOL.
I play Call of Duty with a team, and a recurrent "bitch" over the last year has been concerning "Tommy Whores". (People who only use the Thompson) When I read the "elephant whore" comment, I really cracked-up. Now, that's funny. But sadly, someone will bring it up before long.
At any rate, thanks for the thread. It made my day yesterday.And since yesterday wasn't a good day, the laugh was appreciated.
Our greatest glory lies not in never having fallen, but in rising every time we fall. Oliver Goldsmith
Re: Handy Dandy Bitch Thread
Glad to be of service. Just kind of a fun way to demonstrate Wasaaabi's Law of Software Development:Originally Posted by Captain Fishpants
LOL!
Gil and I have just spent a happy five minutes giggling like loons at this thread. Thanks muchly for the happiness boost.
"Users don't know what they want, but they know for damn sure what they don't want."
"This is supposed to be a happy occasion. Let's not bicker and argue over who killed who."
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