Military Joke Thread

**Degtyarev14.5** · 03-18-2005, 04:12

I believe this dates from WWI...

When the German artillery fires, the French run for cover.
When the British artillery fires, the Germans run for cover.
When the French artillery fires, everyone runs for cover.

Why do Italian tanks have such large rear-vision mirrors?
So the crew can see the battle.

How do you stop a Romanian tank?
Shoot the people pushing it.

A.

**Zalmoxis** · 03-18-2005, 06:40

Originally Posted by Degtyarev14.5

How do you stop a Romanian tank?
Shoot the people pushing it.

A.

Make fun of France, at least Romanians imediately start running when the enemy statrts attacking, they switch sides.

**The Stranger** · 03-18-2005, 08:58

ah you're pushing it

**el_slapper** · 03-18-2005, 12:12

Originally Posted by Degtyarev14.5

I believe this dates from WWI...

When the German artillery fires, the French run for cover.
When the British artillery fires, the Germans run for cover.
When the French artillery fires, everyone runs for cover.
(.../...)

Duh. Might have been true in other wars(especially 1870 one, where all forces went wrong), but in WWI, french artillery was mostly made of accurate 75mm pieces. The lack of high-caliber systems did prevent that kind of things(and was a real lack in our order of battle, by the way).

But hell, I wouldn't trust french artillery, this has never been our strong point, by far, & that joke is nevertheless rather accurate

**Degtyarev14.5** · 03-18-2005, 15:57

Oh my God, relax fellas... It's a joke thread...

A.

**Sir Chauncy** · 03-18-2005, 17:00

Actually El_Slapper is right, during the 1st WW the French artillery was by far the best on the front, in fact I seem to remember the British Troopers wanting to go to the French for advice and guidance, and their officers refusing to stoop to asking the French for help!.

Now if anything is a joke, that is.

**el_slapper** · 03-22-2005, 14:02

I didn't say it was a bad joke, just that the "probably WWI" was probably wrong, that's all.

**Kaiser of Arabia** · 03-22-2005, 21:34

Did you hear about the new Polish submarine? It sunk.
I guess the screen doors were a bad idea.

**Longshanks** · 03-23-2005, 00:02

A Platoon Sergeant and his Platoon Leader are bunking down in the field for the night. The Platoon Sergeant looks up and says, "When you see all the stars in the sky, what do you think, sir?"

The LT replies, "Well, I think of how insignificant we really are in the universe; how small a piece of such a grand design. I can't help but wonder if what we do truly means anything or makes any difference. Why? What do you think of, Sergeant?"

"I think somebody stole the damn tent."