The damage one can do.

[Fragony]

Well first, before I became the nice Fragony that I am now I used to be a complete bastard. In school I used to terrorise my classmates, being the alpha male that I was. Now fast forward to the modern days, yesterday in town I ran into one of my old classmates, I didn't recognise him. I was ordering a few beers, and something hissed my name. He was obviously out for blood, I managed to calm him down, which is a good thing because he has grown pretty big. Then followed a rant of what a complete bastard I was back then, he had to go to the shrink because I caused a minority complex of which he just recently recovered. He was furious, and I was amazed. It was 10 years ago! The funny thing, I don't even remember picking on him. After a beer or two he left, leaving me feeling very very small.

[discovery1]

Congradulations on so spectacullary screwing someone over. Would be more praise worthy if you did it without them realising it at the time though. Shall I share a story someone being utterly smashed(probably should get permission from the Empress who actually did it though)?

[Fragony]

Congradulations on so spectacullary screwing someone over. Would be more praise worthy if you did it without them realising it at the time though. Shall I share a story someone being utterly smashed(probably should get permission from the Empress who actually did it though)?

No thanks, I feel bad enough as it is. I was still a kid ok?

[discovery1]

No thanks, I feel bad enough as it is. I was still a kid ok?

I was being serious(although this will likely kill the thread). What does that make me?

[Fragony]

I was being serious(although this will likely kill the thread). What does that make me?

I don't understand what you are trying to say...

[discovery1]

I was asking for your(collective) judgements on me congradulating you for breaking someone in the short term. I also commented that by doing so I would likely end the thread.

[Fragony]

I was asking for your(collective) judgements on me congradulating you for breaking someone in the short term. I also commented that by doing so I would likely end the thread.

Ok I am lost. What exactly are you saying, save the cryptic stuff for the smart people please.

[Husar]

No problem here, I´ve been called gay(and it hurt because I´m not), people don´t like my face(jealous? ) and a lot of other things, in short, I have no friends left in my village, just some really good friends in other places. But I somehow learned to live with it, screwed my minoritiy complex and today find it quite funny that I have no image to lose here in this region, so
I can do what I want.
Now you´re one of those guys who treat others badly, but I think you shall be forgiven nonetheless, your bad conscious should be a hard punishment already.

[Mikeus Caesar]

We all treat people bad at one point in our lives (as some of you in the colosseum might have recently witnessed me doing). You just have to live with it.

[A.Saturnus]

Saints are sinners who keep on trying...

[Kaiser of Arabia]

Heh, a few years ago, I was the kid that always got picked on, seriously. I took shit from everyone. Now, that's not what gives me the immense hatred for just about everything that I have, but it certainly didn't help. Now about 2 years ago that changed. Alot. Now I'm the lovably anti-social Capo who almost never talks in real life and when he does its really quiet and really fast because I don't give a rats arse about if who im talking to can hear it or not. I only have problems with about 2 or 3 people now, and given the chance I'll solve them with my fists, if I have to. Looking back on it though, the people who made my life hell when I was in elementry and middle schools made me the person I am today, and you know what? I wouldn't change me for the world. And I never held grudges for very long. In fact, two of the people who used to verbally pick on me are now two of my really good friends, and another one who, in 4th grade, used to annoy the crap out of me like that, is my best friend in the world. I guess everybody is different. Just remember that you're not that person anymore, Frag, and really, that's all that matters.

[Byzantine Prince]

Hehe, I believe the right word for it is inferiority complex.

Fragony, as long as you've changed and become mature that's all that matters now. The past is in the past. Just becareful, there's lot's of psychopaths like me running around.

I had the same problem, I used to be pretty weak and other kids would pick on me about it verbally in gym class. Till I turned around and broke their nose in that is(no, not a joke).
I also talked a lot in class(answering questions etc.) so it's safe to say 80-90% of the people in that class autmatically hated my guts and wouldn't mind the opportunity to make fun of me about. But I overcame all that. I feel it has made me a stronger person though. Like Nietzsche said what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger. I believe in that philosophy.

Don't get me wrong, people still hate me, but I'm careful enough not to let any information slip out that they could use against me. I've seen people make fun out of pretty much everyone and not get any in return, I am now doing the same, if I really have to.

[Mikeus Caesar]

I find, that if you get picked on, just retaliate with something clever. The large majority of people who pick on you for no reason are usually complete idiots. As well as annoying them, it makes me feel all superior and good!

[Kaiser of Arabia]

I find, that if you get picked on, just retaliate with something clever. The large majority of people who pick on you for no reason are usually complete idiots. As well as annoying them, it makes me feel all superior and good!

my personal favorite comeback was 'Hey I heard you were doing your sister [or other female relative] last night, ya go for men I take it then?'
Usual response is "Wha...?" By that time I'm generally walking away.

[Redleg]

Well first, before I became the nice Fragony that I am now I used to be a complete bastard. In school I used to terrorise my classmates, being the alpha male that I was. Now fast forward to the modern days, yesterday in town I ran into one of my old classmates, I didn't recognise him. I was ordering a few beers, and something hissed my name. He was obviously out for blood, I managed to calm him down, which is a good thing because he has grown pretty big. Then followed a rant of what a complete bastard I was back then, he had to go to the shrink because I caused a minority complex of which he just recently recovered. He was furious, and I was amazed. It was 10 years ago! The funny thing, I don't even remember picking on him. After a beer or two he left, leaving me feeling very very small.

Yep one of life's little lessons - and it takes a real human being to admit that their past behavior was wrong and learn from that lesson.

Sadly a few others that have posted in this thread seem not to get the jest of what your message here is.

[Devastatin Dave]

To this day I feel terrible for the way I treated someone. His name was Michael and in grade school everyone would beat him up. He would purposely keep after you with snide comments or throw paper at you, etc. Then after school I would beat him up. I was about 8 or 10 years old at the time. Well it turned out that Michael was abused as a child and thats how he would try to get attention. I did not find this out till I had gone off to the Air Force. I try to find him when I go home, but have yet to locate him. Frag, I suggest you try to find this guy and offer a sincere apology. Years of anguish could be wiped away by just acknowledging to this person you did him wrong. Or you can go through life with this little bit of guilt that you missed an oporitunity to right a wrong. Thats what I have to deal with for the rest of my life unless I find Michael and show him I was wrong to have done what I've done...

I suspect that there have been several people here on the Org that were picked on or terrorized by others at some point in their life or are living it right now. I'm sorry. I am very sorry for what you went through or what you are going through. I pray that you will find peace and success after your troubling times. Strive to overcome the cruelty of others, you will make not only your life but the life of others better...

I also suspect that there are others here that are doing the terrorizing and giving cruelty. Stop it. One day you will know their pain and will be guilt ridden. Please consider how you would feel if you were in your victoms situation.

What would Jesus do?

[Byzantine Prince]

Dave, I understand your viewpoint, but I don't like it. It smells of infiriority complex. By acknowledging that you wronged someone the way you did makes the situation even worse. If the person you picked on is strong he will overcome, like I did, and will become a very powerful character because of it.

I'm not condoning picking on others because it will hurt their feelings and you won't get the chance to be with them, but you shouldn't feel completely bad. This world has so much worse things happenening in it that I consider this pretty light stuff.

I believe having respect is the key. If kids weren't so rude this wouldn't be a problem, seriously.

[Devastatin Dave]

I still believe that if you've wronged someone you should be decent enough to acknowlegde it to their face. But you have good points BP, for once!!! J/K

[Navaros]

Frag can't blame the guy for being mad at him. if that guy did to Frag what Frag did to him; then Frag would probably have done the same thing given the same situation

if one looks at the situation honestly, Frag got what he deserved.

i'm not saying that to be mean or anything, just calling a spade a spade.

[BDC]

Wow, the power. Without even meaning to you crippled someone for 10 years.

He must have been a bit of a loser to be fair. I mean how many people are that bothered by what happens at school once they leave?

[ichi]

After a beer or two he left, leaving me feeling very very small.

which means that you have changed, for the better.

for some folks being kind and gentle is natural, easy. For some of us its a little harder, and when we successfully improve our treatment of others, its cause for celebration.

This may sound odd, but the fact that you felt small should make make you feel quite big.

ichi

[Big King Sanctaphrax]

Wow, the power. Without even meaning to you crippled someone for 10 years.

He must have been a bit of a loser to be fair. I mean how many people are that bothered by what happens at school once they leave?

You'd be suprised. I got given a lot of hassle at school, and I can see how if I'd been a different kind of person it could have really messed me up for a long time. Either that or I'd have fallen into line, failed all my exams and denounced you guys as a bunch of geeks.

[doc_bean]

I think a lot of things that happen in high school stick with a lot of people. I had some guys trying to terrorize me. One guy wimped out when I suggested a fight, he was like two heads taller than me. I actually got called names recently for no other reason than that I wear glasses. Bullies tend to be stupid, and cowards, if you can just see through it.

But Frag, the guy probably feels a little better now that he has said something about it to you. We all make mistakes, C'est la vie.

[discovery1]

Ok I am lost. What exactly are you saying, save the cryptic stuff for the smart people please.

I'm asking for you all to condemn me, which would make sense since I'm encouraging you and others to hurt people.

[Devastatin Dave]

I'm asking for you all to condemn me, which would make sense since I'm encouraging you and others to hurt people.

Ok, i condemn you!!!!

[GoreBag]

I'm asking for you all to condemn me, which would make sense since I'm encouraging you and others to hurt people.

Nah, I agree with you. Feeling bad because some guy on whom you picked ten years ago couldn't deal with it and successfully tries to send you on a guilt trip for it is kind of sad. Obviously, it didn't bother you before, but now, when confronted with a beating from someone who's grown bigger than you, you back down?

It's not my place to say, but I don't approve.

[ah_dut]

You'd be suprised. I got given a lot of hassle at school, and I can see how if I'd been a different kind of person it could have really messed me up for a long time. Either that or I'd have fallen into line, failed all my exams and denounced you guys as a bunch of geeks.

err I get a lot of hassle at school...and my school is supposed to be good. Well I guess in the case of one of the muppets it is got...as he seemed to have a problem with fighting...he just ran off and let's say his street cred rocketed in the opposite direction. When you're short, academically inclined and somewhat thin skinned, a lot of very annoying things happen. Live with it

Denouncing me as a geek? Geek Power

Bullies tend to be stupid, and cowards, if you can just see through it.

How true...

[Al Khalifah]

Of course, if you want to feel better about yourself when you're being bullied, you could always find someone even weaker than you and bully them. Wouldn't that just make you feel so much better knowing that you're another link in life's great chain of people shitting on other people.

I find it makes good training for when you're older in life and working for an organisation with hierarchy.

[Evil_Maniac From Mars]

my personal favorite comeback was 'Hey I heard you were doing your sister [or other female relative] last night, ya go for men I take it then?'
Usual response is "Wha...?" By that time I'm generally walking away.

No, my friend, the ultimate is either saying "Your Mom" and walking away, or saying something like "how was your Mom last night", or "your sister's good". Just say it though, don't actually do it! unless......

[Kraxis]

Actually how you are treated as a kid by other kids can have a serious impact on your future life.

I was picked on... Don't really know why, I was taller and stronger than most of my age back then, and could fight anyone in 1v1, but you tend not to be too confrontational when it is a group. Especially when you are in te same class where you can expect more of it the next day. Even more the others knew very well the line between giving me a casus belli for throwing fists and just having me edge towards it. When you are in the situation you know if it is reasonable to actually do something physical about it, and I never really had the chance. But the constant verbal attacks and exclusion does hit hard.
I'm not hurt by it now I think, but I can't remember any specific situation, only that I didn't have a nice 7-8 years (the first few years were good and nice though). I have simply blocked it out.
Besides I was never really the lowest on the rung, until the last year or so, but then people began to grow up and it was getting better.
There was one guy, who was a step down from me. Damn, he shouldn't do anything towards me and I would went all my steam at him. I remember chasing him all the way home one day... I'm not proud of it, but I think that was part of what kept me sane. Kind of sad when you think about it.

When I got to high school it was a great release, and I put everything behind me. I became in fact a whole new person, the one I am now. And I think that is the difference. Had I been treated harsher, just a bit, I'm not so certain I would have been able to put it behind me. And I think it helped me that I have an open personality so that I'm able to connect fast with other people. But I do remember the first time someone made a comment at me in high school, it felt like I was back in previous years, and I had to pull myself together to make a comeback. Then the other guy laughed and I found out that he had just gauged me, sort of "is he cool or not?" From then on I never let such comments bite on me and have since high school never experienced any such outside the brotherhood of friends, though it can still sting, but that is just because I'm damaged and I can shrug it off because I know they don't mean anything bad with it.

So if I was so borderline, I can certainly understand that if somebody who had a harder time can be broken by it. If you are broken as a child you will carry it with you. FOREVER!