Fall of Constantinople

[edyzmedieval]

Yes, the IIIrd thing I used it deliberately, but since I got feedback, I won't use it any more. Thanks Ludens.

[Prince Cobra]

Well, I was really impressed. The Chapter is excellent and definately the best in the whole novel! Congratulations, edyz!

As always I will not comment your English since I am not very good in this part too. But it seems it has improved .

Well, I think edyz tried to depict the magnificent court of Athens and its ruler by describing the surrounding, Ludens. My personal opinion is that in such a cases there sould be made some exceptions.

But ... ( I know you hate this word) you are just at the very beginning. There are many things to be improved like making your characters more close to the reader. There are many not very connected to each other scenes (btw, I have a common problem). But I see progress so in the process of writing you will overcome it. So go on.

And please avoid phrases like admiring the monuments of the Akropolis for the 100th time!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[edyzmedieval]

Yes, I have to agree, that phrase was a bit off.

Thank you Stephen for the comments.
I am continuing to write, especially because it's vacation time.