Scream... run... HOLY S***!

[Beirut]

So, my woman is out at choir practice and I'm taking care of the kids. One (9)is brushing her teeth in the room next to me. The other (7) is playing in her room. I'm at my computer. All of a sudden there is a scream. Now anyone who lives with two little girls knows that screaming is a part of life, but this wasn't an ordinary scream. It froze my blood.

I go flying downstairs into her bedroom and there's no kid, just a great big four foot high dresser collapsed on the floor with crap everywhere and a scream coming from underneath. ACK! One second of fear, panic, and darkness overwhelms me.

The next second that ******* chest of drawers is airborne. My little sweetie is lying on the floor. I pick her up and give her the once over, check for blood on her head, that she still has two eyes, things like that. Then I see her hands. I see a red, twisted thing where her fingers are. It looks like one of her fingers got horribly mangled. S***!

She was holding onto a small red plastic lizard. It looked like a ripped up finger. Good grief! From what I can see, she had pulled all the drawers open and then was pulling on the top drawer to see in, and that brought the whole thing down on her.

The end result was one scratched finger (Thank you Lord!), two terrified kids, and one thankful and scared Beirut. Tomorrow I'm nailing that dresser to the wall. Mind you, I'm sure she won't pull all the drawers out like that again.

All this was about fifteen minutes ago.

Kids....

I need a beer.

[Dooz]

*pops you open a cold on*

Dear lord...

[GoreBag]

You'll laugh in about an hour. I remember doing stuff like that when I young..

[Krusader]

Good to hear (or read) everything ended up fine.
And as NeonGod said, yeah I used to stuff like that when I was young too.

[IrishMike]

I did that once, excpet nobody was home. Took me a good solid hour to get out .

I'm glad everything is fine at your house. Good to hear nobody was hurt.

[ichi]

ROTFLMAO

Good one Beirut

Once my wife screamed my name from the other room, in a way that made me think there was an intruder in the house or she had lopped off her fingers.

I rushed to her aid only to discover that a bird had found its way into the bedroom.

Later that evening I was just sitting at the computer when I noticed that my colon sphincter ached for some reason.

All well that ends well mate. May you and the kids have many scares that end as nicely

ichi

[Kaiser of Arabia]

Glad to hear everything was fine, Beirut. I've done stuff like that

[discovery1]

I'm glad that all turned out well. You can probably look foward to similar things.

[Beirut]

I'm glad that all turned out well. You can probably look foward to similar things.

My God, and they're not even teenagers yet.

"The horror. The horror."
Colonel Kurtz from A-Pack-of-Kids Now

[KukriKhan]

Nice job Dad!!

I can just see the airborne dresser

Kids = why 20-somethings turn 45 seemingly overnight.

You are served, Sir:


Tip on securing the dresser: find the nearest stud first. Regular drywall can't withstand the pulling stress and torque of a determined 40-pound climber.

Glad the girls are OK.

[Voigtkampf]

Glad that all went well, Beirut-kun! Pheeew…

A word of comfort; I hear that some women like white-haired or gray-haired man, even bold-headed men, so, not all is lost. Hence, don’t get a shock when you step before the mirror in the morning.

[Papewaio]

Things to look forward to...

[Gregoshi]

My God, and they're not even teenagers yet.

Phone rings

Gregoshi: Hello.

Voice: Hello, I'm Mary Smith from Nationwide Insurance. I'm calling for your daughter to ask her some questions about the accident she was in last night. Is she there?

Gregoshi: Accident? What accident? (thinking: must be a mistake, she was dropped off at the mall last night with some friends)

Voice: You don't know about the accident?

Gregoshi: Uh, no.

Voice: Oh, I'm sorry. She was in the car of Erika Brown when it was involved in a collision - but don't worry, everyone is okay. (Gregoshi thinking: Ah, Erika. She just got her driver's license last month ...)

Gregoshi: That's a relief. Where was this accident?

Voice: It was in the town of West Chester.

(Gregoshi thinking: she was supposed to be at the mall in Exton)

All this because my daughter and her friends got bored at the mall. Beware the bored teenager - stupid things (or worse) will happen.

Anyway, I'm glad your daughter is okay Beruit.

[TonkaToys]

Kids....

I need a beer

I've got a 1yr2mnth old and he is already tripping over and catching his head on the edge of tables, or tugging at my bike when it is on its stand... GULP your story only goes to show I've got years of toppling furniture, falling kids and stressed out parenthood to come! No wonder my hair is going grey, and that isn't even the ones on my head!

Glad the kid survived... like the "let's fool dad with the red mangled fingers trick".

[Rob The Bastard]

My 11 month old daughter took a dive out of her high chair yesterday,... all my fault ( according to my wife ) for not keeping a better watch over her.

She seems fine today.

Virtually indestructable! ( good thing, too )

[SwordsMaster]

yep, kids... my 2 year old brother loved to play with my bike and once I heard a crash and then a scream and the bike was lying on the ground and he was standing right in the space in the middle of the frame. Dunno how he did it cause he is bigger than the space itself, but he didnt have a scratch.

And in my house every single object is already bolted to the floor/walls and the drawers are locked with 'anti-baby' (and adult) locks. My parents probably remember how it was to raise me....

[Beirut]

I appreciate the kind thoughts, sympathy and warnings of oh so much worse to come.

My hair is already thinning, I'm a bit gray on the sides (I still look damn good though! ) and I'm sure by the time my two darlings, suspected of having links to Al-Kidsda and who have definitely trained with O-Sesame (Street) Bin-Laden, turn into teenagers, I will be a complete basket case.

"Look! If I hold sharp scissors and ride the dog I look like a knight!"

"Gah! Hy heart..."

I'm thinking of trading them in for pit bulls or rhinocerouses or something else better for my health.

[Husar]

I´ve been sewed on my head 5 times when I was a kid, all those radiators I fell against...

Glad nothing happened.

[Ser Clegane]

Yesterday I was running with a friend and we were discussing potential plans for kids (neither her nor me do have kids yet).

I guess next time this topic comes up I will mention some of the stories to counter her enthusiasm

[English assassin]

There was a story in the UK a few months ago where two kids managed to pull, I think it was a chest of drawers but it might have been a bookcase, down on them. Both killed. One morning you wake up as parents, the next you don't.

You just can't dwell on it that much or you would go mad. I did rearrange the furniture so if the bookcases get pulled over they fall onto chairs rather than flat on the floor though...

Not looking forward to my boy being a teenager. Number one victims of violent crime, teenage boys...

[zelda12]

Hehe, I fell a flights of stairs as a kid cried my eyes out until my came and gave me a hug, got bored with the hug and started fidgeting so my mum put me down and wandered off somewhere she came back a minute later to find me climbing back up the stairs. She never fails to remind me off that one.

[ah_dut]

I appreciate the kind thoughts, sympathy and warnings of oh so much worse to come.

My hair is already thinning, I'm a bit gray on the sides (I still look damn good though! ) and I'm sure by the time my two darlings, suspected of having links to Al-Kidsda and who have definitely trained with O-Sesame (Street) Bin-Laden, turn into teenagers, I will be a complete basket case.

"Look! If I hold sharp scissors and ride the dog I look like a knight!"

"Gah! Hy heart..."

I'm thinking of trading them in for pit bulls or rhinocerouses or something else better for my health.

Hehe...at least you don't have people my age as previously commented. Then again, I guess your attitude to it all is made very apparant in the Daddy's Dating Rules thread

Don't worry Beirut...kids are quite indestructable, I know...I was a wicketkeeper who got a bit curious how close to the wicket I could stand and got a bat to the face...not even a scar or fractured bone. Then there was the time I played touch rugby on the playground (tarmac) and got spear tackled and ripped a small hole in my arm at the elbow. All in my younger days obviously So don't worry, nail everything down and you'll all be fine...till they reach 14

[Steppe Merc]

Glad everything is ok. I thought my new puppy was bad enough! I guess young critters of all sorts aren't very breakable. Good thing too.
This just reinforces my desire to never have kids... expensive, loud things that hurt themselves to easy...

[Mikeus Caesar]

My dad has told me plenty of stories of mishaps when he was a kid...he once fell over and scraped the skin of his knees when he was 6, and my Auntie Sue (3/4 at the time) did nothing but point and laughed while he cried his eyes out. And another time, My Grandad was holding my Dad up on a windowsill (he was 2 at the time), letting him wave at my Nan as she pulled up the drive-way. Obviously, he slipped out of my Grandad's grip, fell off the windowsill, and smacked his head on the radiator. When he told me that story, it finally confirmed my suspicions that he had been dropped on the head as a child...

[The Stranger]

whuaahahahahahahaha

[TonkaToys]

It is fate I tell you... I read this thread yesterday and my boy decides to fall headfirst off the changing table when I turn my back... you should have seen how quickly I spun around and caught him with one arm, whilst he was upside down about 10cm off the ground! Jeez.

[English assassin]

Its amazing isn't it, become a parent and suddenly you have the most incredible jedi reactions, but ONLY when it come to catching children flying through the air/about to impale themselves.

Wish we could do the mind control thing too...

[Beirut]

It is fate I tell you... I read this thread yesterday and my boy decides to fall headfirst off the changing table when I turn my back... you should have seen how quickly I spun around and caught him with one arm, whilst he was upside down about 10cm off the ground! Jeez.

Go Yoda!

[Laridus Konivaich]

Go Yoda!

None of my children have ever done anything like that... o wait! I don't have any...