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Thread: How World War III will start (have some humor)

  1. #1
    (Insert innuendo here) Member Balloon Bomber Champion DemonArchangel's Avatar
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    Default How World War III will start (have some humor)

    How World War III will start? Well, here a few potential causes (Link in your own mind, what happens next)

    *A few teenage pranksters drain the massive beer resevoirs under the German Reichstag. Deprived of alcohol, German legislators start believing what the Neo Nazis say.

    *China invades Taiwan.

    *Indian Code Monekys begin demanding higher wages.

    *Al Qaida attacks Mecca in a fratricidal manuever.

    *PanzerJager's tank divisions begin pouring across the Canadian Border

    *Britain tries to re-establish its empire.

    *Israel attacks other Middle Eastern Countries in a pre-emptive strike.

    *The Soviet Union didn't really fall. That's what they wanted you to think.

    *The Catholic Church again attempts to retake the "holy" land.
    Quote Originally Posted by Louis VI the Fat View Post
    China is not a world power. China is the world, and it's surrounded by a ring of tiny and short-lived civilisations like the Americas, Europeans, Mongols, Moghuls, Indians, Franks, Romans, Japanese, Koreans.

  2. #2
    probably bored Member BDC's Avatar
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    Default Re: How World War III will start (have some humor)

    Some Italian politician will make one too many rude remarks about German holidaymakers, and it will all start with that.

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    Resident Northern Irishman Member ShadesPanther's Avatar
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    Default Re: How World War III will start (have some humor)

    * Someone finally goes "postal" after the amount of Indian callcentre monkies calling him, butchering his name and trying to sell him crap he clearly doesn't want

    *Jamster Headquaters gets blown up which is actually the Front for those evil Commie-Nazis who start WWIII in response
    Last edited by ShadesPanther; 06-05-2005 at 20:47.

    "A man may fight for many things: his country, his principles, his friends, the glistening tear on the cheek of a golden child. But personally, I'd mudwrestle my own mother for a ton of cash, an amusing clock and a stack of French porn."
    - Edmund Blackadder

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    Oni Member Samurai Waki's Avatar
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    Default Re: How World War III will start (have some humor)

    We will see the rise of a Penguin Militaristic Autocracy in Antarctica... with their impressive abilities of reproduction the Penguin Armies will Arm themselves with the best weaponry available, and slowly from South to North overrun Humanity in a waves of Brave Penguin Warriors... leading to Humanities slavery by our penguin overlords...All Hail the Penguins!

  5. #5
    Humanist Senior Member A.Saturnus's Avatar
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    Default Re: How World War III will start (have some humor)

    The software industry will try to establish TCPA worldwide. Linus Torvalds calls the open source resistence to arms.

  6. #6
    probably bored Member BDC's Avatar
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    Default Re: How World War III will start (have some humor)

    Quote Originally Posted by A.Saturnus
    The software industry will try to establish TCPA worldwide. Linus Torvalds calls the open source resistence to arms.
    My militia is already awaiting the call to arms.

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    Scandinavian and loving it Member Lazul's Avatar
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    Default Re: How World War III will start (have some humor)

    *one nuke goes of... doesnt really matter where, everyone will go paranoid beyond belief and tadaaa; armagedon!
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    Master of useless knowledge Senior Member Kitten Shooting Champion, Eskiv Champion Ironside's Avatar
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    Default Re: How World War III will start (have some humor)

    The Hundred years war gets renamned to the 700-years war.
    We are all aware that the senses can be deceived, the eyes fooled. But how can we be sure our senses are not being deceived at any particular time, or even all the time? Might I just be a brain in a tank somewhere, tricked all my life into believing in the events of this world by some insane computer? And does my life gain or lose meaning based on my reaction to such solipsism?

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    Not affiliated with Red Dwarf. Member Ianofsmeg16's Avatar
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    Default Re: How World War III will start (have some humor)

    i beleive the ginger's will take over the world, therefore starting world war III, so if you gingerist, you'd better watch out
    When I was a child
    I caught a fleeting glimpse
    Out of the corner of my eye.
    I turned to look but it was gone
    I cannot put my finger on it now
    The child is grown,
    The dream is gone.
    I have become comfortably numb...

    Proud Supporter of the Gahzette

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    Resident Northern Irishman Member ShadesPanther's Avatar
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    Default Re: How World War III will start (have some humor)

    Quote Originally Posted by ian_of_smeg16
    i beleive the ginger's will take over the world, therefore starting world war III, so if you gingerist, you'd better watch out
    Gingers are dying out

    So they have to make their move soon.......

    "A man may fight for many things: his country, his principles, his friends, the glistening tear on the cheek of a golden child. But personally, I'd mudwrestle my own mother for a ton of cash, an amusing clock and a stack of French porn."
    - Edmund Blackadder

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    zombologist Senior Member doc_bean's Avatar
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    Default Re: How World War III will start (have some humor)

    *The Xbox 360 and the Playstation 3 get released, rabid fanboys start a massive killing spree

    *The Chinese steal the Coca Cola recipe

    *France gets tired of everyone laughing with their military achievements, decides to invade the US

    *Castro reinstalls some missiles aimed at Florida, Bush thinks this is good way to cut the Medicare budget, the retired overthrow the government

    *Navaros gets a following

    *random English football team wins random league

    *Germans get tired of having all those other countries vote down the constitution, decide to force it unto them
    Yes, Iraq is peaceful. Go to sleep now. - Adrian II

  12. #12
    Shadow Senior Member Kagemusha's Avatar
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    Default Re: How World War III will start (have some humor)

    I still think that the Dutch conspiracy Starts it with their balloons.
    Just look at the frontrooms talk your own language thread.There is all the proof you ever need.
    Last edited by Kagemusha; 06-05-2005 at 23:04.
    Ja Mata Tosainu Sama.

  13. #13

    Default Re: How World War III will start (have some humor)

    Microsoft takes over half of the world and wages war against the remaining resistance.
    Therapy helps, but screaming obscenities is cheaper.

  14. #14
    (Insert innuendo here) Member Balloon Bomber Champion DemonArchangel's Avatar
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    Default Re: How World War III will start (have some humor)

    Navaros has a following. It's at

    link Warning: objectionable language.
    Last edited by KukriKhan; 06-05-2005 at 23:56.
    Quote Originally Posted by Louis VI the Fat View Post
    China is not a world power. China is the world, and it's surrounded by a ring of tiny and short-lived civilisations like the Americas, Europeans, Mongols, Moghuls, Indians, Franks, Romans, Japanese, Koreans.

  15. #15

    Default Re: How World War III will start (have some humor)

    WWIII has already started.

  16. #16
    Caged for your safety Member RabidGibbon's Avatar
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    Default Re: How World War III will start (have some humor)

    The Barbarian Invasion XP fails to fix the load/save game bug, and legions of disaffected total war players take to the streets to force CA to release a patch that does.

    Law enforcement agencies attempt to restore order but are over run by the superior tactics of thousands of arm chair generals who have been many years in virtual training. Within the week the cheesiest TW players have seized control of all the worlds superpowers using hideous "cav blob spam" tactics and several rival empires make war on each other in an attempt to seize 50 provinces and be declared victorious!!!

  17. #17
    Member Senior Member Proletariat's Avatar
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    Default Re: How World War III will start (have some humor)

    Quote Originally Posted by doc_bean
    *The Xbox 360 and the Playstation 3 get released, rabid fanboys start a massive killing spree

    *The Chinese steal the Coca Cola recipe

    *France gets tired of everyone laughing with their military achievements, decides to invade the US

    *Castro reinstalls some missiles aimed at Florida, Bush thinks this is good way to cut the Medicare budget, the retired overthrow the government

    *Navaros gets a following

    *random English football team wins random league

    *Germans get tired of having all those other countries vote down the constitution, decide to force it unto them
    Easily the funniest thing posted here in weeks.

  18. #18
    Member Member bmolsson's Avatar
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    Default Re: How World War III will start (have some humor)

    China decides to expand its borders..... That will happen within 20 years.....

  19. #19
    |LGA.3rd|General Clausewitz Member Kaiser of Arabia's Avatar
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    Default Re: How World War III will start (have some humor)

    I take over Leichtenstein...nuff said.

    Why do you hate Freedom?
    The US is marching backward to the values of Michael Stivic.

  20. #20

    Default Re: How World War III will start (have some humor)

    i think it will start with the US sending a atom bomb over to russia or russia sending a atom bomb over here and other countries will get involved and it will start from there

  21. #21
    Member Member Productivity's Avatar
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    Default Re: How World War III will start (have some humor)

    Bartix invades America.

  22. #22
    Eliminated Faction Heir Member Laridus Konivaich's Avatar
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    Default Re: How World War III will start (have some humor)

    * My sister is using the computer when I really want to be online

    * Somebody deletes the babe thread

    * A politician tells the truth
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    Not affiliated with Red Dwarf. Member Ianofsmeg16's Avatar
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    Default Re: How World War III will start (have some humor)

    Quote Originally Posted by ShadesPanther
    Gingers are dying out

    So they have to make their move soon.......
    the gingers are on the increase thanks to inter hairial breeding, but unfortunatly these half breeds to not have the srength of their ginger forefathers......so were arming our six year old children with shotguns and M16s supplied by the bush administration
    When I was a child
    I caught a fleeting glimpse
    Out of the corner of my eye.
    I turned to look but it was gone
    I cannot put my finger on it now
    The child is grown,
    The dream is gone.
    I have become comfortably numb...

    Proud Supporter of the Gahzette

  24. #24

    Default Re: How World War III will start (have some humor)

    Quote Originally Posted by Kaiser of Arabia
    I take over Leichtenstein...nuff said.
    Would anyone notice?

    I think we all know it'll all start when I am late home one Friday night because I went for "Just one (t)" pint with my mates, thus begins WWIII The War of the Sexes (t).

  25. #25
    Tree Killer Senior Member Beirut's Avatar
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    Default Re: How World War III will start (have some humor)

    Quote Originally Posted by DemonArchangel
    *PanzerJager's tank divisions begin pouring across the Canadian Border
    Operation Thundering Maples put into action by Canadian government. Panzer's tanks collectiovely say "Oh s***!!!" and beat one helluva hasty retreat, offering profuse apologies while backing up at 60mph.

    And you think we're kidding...
    Last edited by Beirut; 06-06-2005 at 12:18.
    Unto each good man a good dog

  26. #26
    Lord of the House Flies Member Al Khalifah's Avatar
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    Default Re: How World War III will start (have some humor)

    A coalition of McDonalds, KFC, Pizza Hut and Burger King unite and kill off the majority of the worlds population with a selection of new 'healthy' yet affordable alternatives.
    The remaining population form a resistance movement called the Subway Alliance, but a great schism between the 6" and the Foot-Longers causes the group to significantly weaken and almost become extinct. Petty divisions over issues such as whether the foot-long is or merely represents the spirit of a healthy life style and the translation of the menu into properly spelt English do not prevent ultimate victory for the SA.
    Cowardice is to run from the fear;
    Bravery is not to never feel the fear.
    Bravery is to be terrified as hell;
    But to hold the line anyway.

  27. #27
    These titles are too shor Member TonkaToys's Avatar
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    Default Re: How World War III will start (have some humor)

    George Lucas announces the next "Final Trilogy" of the Star Wars saga:
    1) The Watery Saviour - an in depth look at Jar Jar Binks' childhood and how he became the heroic figure that is the Gungan's only hope against an evil empire of robots (because having evil people is not PC anymore).
    2) From The Trees - a study of Ewok culture and how they originally descended from peaceful, intelligent bear like creatures into warmongering, bow twanging, rock throwing, operation "Thundering Maple" using warriors able to defeat technologically superior Imperial Stormtroopers.
    3) The Return Of The Nerds - the final final final installment sees a bunch of single men able to quote lines from any Star Wars movie boring evil pub-goers into submission.

    Naturally this polarises civilisation into those that believe that George can do no wrong (and even if it is a pants film, the music still rocks) against those that hate the fact that the legacy of the original Star Wars trilogy has been tarnished by the second trilogy.

  28. #28

    Default Re: How World War III will start (have some humor)

    Quote Originally Posted by TonkaToys
    3) The Return Of The Nerds - the final final final installment sees a bunch of single men able to quote lines from any Star Wars movie boring evil pub-goers into submission.
    Dammit, it's already begun

  29. #29
    Humanist Senior Member A.Saturnus's Avatar
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    Default Re: How World War III will start (have some humor)

    Quote Originally Posted by dgb
    Bartix invades America.
    Maybe, but what units do Bartix have??

  30. #30
    Jillian & Allison's Daddy Senior Member Don Corleone's Avatar
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    Default Re: How World War III will start (have some humor)

    Quote Originally Posted by Prince Laridus Konivaich
    *

    * Somebody deletes the babe thread
    Hey, Byzantine Prince insulted Solypsist so much, he quit doing the Babe Thread. If ever there were a case to be made for a real world lynching for one's activities on a chat board.... If Big John hadn't have saved the day, half the male org members would currently be driving around Western Canada looking for an obnoxious teenager with a Greek accent.

    I personally think WWIII will begin in tears. Hooters Air will file for Chapter 11 bankruptcy protection from the federal government. As they haven't made substantial campaign contributions for either major party, their request will be denied. In an effort to prop up the sagging airline, revenue will be drained away from the restaurant division, and the calander division, resulting in a total collapse. Pot bellied, beer swilling middle aged men across America will unite in an enraged crusade to bring the hotties back to their hometown. As worldwide press captures the story, pot bellied, beer swilling middle age men around the world will take up arms in an effort to assert their rights to good wings, cheap beer, and hot waitresses in gym shorts.
    Last edited by Don Corleone; 06-06-2005 at 16:10.
    "A man who doesn't spend time with his family can never be a real man."
    Don Vito Corleone: The Godfather, Part 1.

    "Then wait for them and swear to God in heaven that if they spew that bull to you or your family again you will cave there heads in with a sledgehammer"
    Strike for the South

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