What is wrong with Boat Shoes ?

[kiwitt]

According to this, we should not be wearing them.

Ok, enough. Boat shoes must be stopped. NOW. People, I can't express just how ugly these shoes are. Most fashion faux pas have their brief moment in the sun, but eventually end up being retired to Savers. Hammer pants, light-up LA Gears, and Hyper-colour t-shirts all went away after a few painful years, but Boat Shoes have been around for about thirty years, and the ******s are still going strong. Why? Why, God, why? Even fashion-retards generally learn from their fashion mistakes and eventually move on to new fashion mistakes, but some men seem to obliviously wear Boat Shoes their entire adult life. Why doesn't someone tell them? Why doesn't someone say, "Sorry mate, but I feel after ten years I've gotta say this - those are the ****ing ugliest shoes ever. They make you look like a total prat. I'm not sure we can remain mates if you keep wearing them." Friends don't let friends wear Boat Shoes.

And then there are the ones with TASSELS, like the shoes weren't ugly enough already. Tassels are for stripper's tits, not footwear. In fact, I'd rather wear stripper's tits on my feet than Boat Shoes. I bet even the cows who are slaughtered to make boat shoes are embarrassed. The other cows up in cow heaven are probably like, "Dude, I was only killed to be mixed up with rat meat in McDonald's burgers, but even I think you're a total joke. Boat Shoes are ****ing ugly."

Seriously. Why can't people see how insanely ugly Boat Shoes are? Why won't they just DIE?