Ted Kennedy May Have Been "Under The Influence"
by Nickie Goomba
WASHINGTON (Goomba News Network) -- Last night's Democratic Party response to President George W. Bush's speech on Iraq was at times uneven and incoherent. Senator Edward Kennedy (D-MA) attempted to inspire the nation with a short presentation detailing the Democratic Party's plan for Iraq. Here are excerpts from Kennedy's speech:
"The Democratic Party is like a big car...an SUV...or a whataya call it?... a Hummer. We've got lots of room in the back seat for Liberty and Freedom."
"There is room for all Iraqis in the big Democratic Party car. Some of them can sit in the front and some of them can squeeze into the back seat with Liberty and Freedom and... Michael Moore"
Kennedy then fell into a fit of giggles.
"I'm going to drive that big Democratic Party car with Iraqis and Freedom and Justice and Liberty and Michael Moore and Barbara Boxer and Barama Osama and...America...and I'll drive over President Clinton's Bridge to the 21st Century."
Suddenly there were loud whispers from off camera and Kennedy seemed annoyed.
"What? What? Don't worry, I can drive."
At this point, the screen went black for 11 seconds. Senator Joseph Biden (D-DE) then appeared to complete the national address.
This was the second embarrassment for the Democratic Party in one week. Last Sunday, Senator Robert Byrd (D-WV) compared Iraq to a big unruly German shepherd his family owned during his early years. He stated that his Uncle Clem had taken the dog to some people he knew who had a big farm in the country where the dog could run and be happy. Byrd then stated that he had the same plan for the people of Iraq.
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