thanx for your reply and critic...i know what youre saying and i noticed it myself too. (as alot of other people) it comes from this: this story was written for the contest...and i just pasted pieces to it. so i wrote a piece and added it later i added another piece between the original and the 2nd piece...and that way you wont get a real good transition...i'm working on it so it will become one whole story
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