Results 1 to 9 of 9

Thread: PC Strikes Again?

  1. #1
    Chief Sniffer Senior Member ichi's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2003
    Posts
    3,132

    Default PC Strikes Again?

    Santa Claus gets code of conduct



    LONDON (Reuters) - It's the Santa Clause and its aim is to root out substandard Santas.

    Jolly, bearded Father Christmas has been ordered to clean up his act or be forced to hang up his trademark red suit.

    "We are trying to eradicate shoddy Santas," James Lovell of the Ministry of Fun agency told Reuters the day after a secret summit of Santas drew up guidelines for girth, beard length, attire, footwear and general demeanor.

    "Santa is a magical and cuddly man, not a fat, smelly slob," said Lovell, whose agency fills 500 Santa positions a year. "I even saw a Santa last year wearing trainers (sneakers)."


    From this December Santas -- who only substitute for the real thing when he is busy elsewhere -- must be neatly presented, have a bushy white beard no more than six inches long and a girth of no greater than 48 inches and no less than 46 inches.


    "He must not smell of drink or body odor and his 'Ho! Ho! Ho!' must resonate deeply," Lovell added.
    10/07/05 10:49
    Clearly more PC violence, but I can't tell if its from the left or right this time.

    What's next, no rabid Easter Bunnies or thin Turkeys?

    Where will it all end!!!

    ichi
    Stay Calm, Be Alert, Think Clearly, Act Decisively

    CoH

  2. #2
    German Enthusiast Member Alexanderofmacedon's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    Where Columbus condemned the natives
    Posts
    3,124

    Default Re: PC Strikes Again?

    It's the right!


  3. #3
    The Black Senior Member Papewaio's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2001
    Location
    Sydney, Australia
    Posts
    15,677

    Default Re: PC Strikes Again?

    Wheres the link... James Lovell of the Ministry of Fun... looks more like a April Fools joke then a real thing.
    Our genes maybe in the basement but it does not stop us chosing our point of view from the top.
    Quote Originally Posted by Louis VI the Fat
    Pape for global overlord!!
    Quote Originally Posted by English assassin
    Squid sources report that scientists taste "sort of like chicken"
    Quote Originally Posted by frogbeastegg View Post
    The rest is either as average as advertised or, in the case of the missionary, disappointing.

  4. #4
    Mystic Bard Member Soulforged's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    Another Skald
    Posts
    2,138

    Default Re: PC Strikes Again?

    Quote Originally Posted by Papewaio
    Wheres the link... James Lovell of the Ministry of Fun... looks more like a April Fools joke then a real thing.
    Yes I thought the same...
    Born On The Flames

  5. #5
    Magister Vitae Senior Member Kraxis's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2002
    Location
    Frederiksberg, Denmark
    Posts
    7,129

    Default Re: PC Strikes Again?

    Ministry of Fun... Should be a little pointer to all.
    You may not care about war, but war cares about you!


  6. #6
    Ambiguous Member Byzantine Prince's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    4,334

    Default Re: PC Strikes Again?

    How about the Ministry of Ethics bans Santa for lying, or causing lies to children. For some reason we assume that it's ok to lie because someone is very young, it's sick in my opinion.

  7. #7
    Lord of the House Flies Member Al Khalifah's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2004
    Location
    The Golden Caliphate
    Posts
    1,644

    Default Re: PC Strikes Again?

    How about the Ministry of Ethics bans Santa for lying, or causing lies to children. For some reason we assume that it's ok to lie because someone is very young, it's sick in my opinion.
    It's because lying is a so much more convenient way to get people to do what you say and to see your point of view.

    Little boy: Why should I be good daddy?
    Father: Because if you're not Santa Claus won't come and visit and bring you any presents.
    Little boy: OK I'll be good.

    It doesn't really matter about age really.

    British man: Why should we go to war with a country that's 5,000 miles away?
    Tony Blair: Because they have weapons of mass destruction that could attack Britain in 45 minutes.
    Britain: Oh crap... send in the soldiers! SEND IN THE SOLDIERS!

    Is this the point where I say Q.E.D ?
    Cowardice is to run from the fear;
    Bravery is not to never feel the fear.
    Bravery is to be terrified as hell;
    But to hold the line anyway.

  8. #8
    Member Member Azi Tohak's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    Smallville USA.
    Posts
    971

    Default Re: PC Strikes Again?

    ...moving along.

    When I first saw that topic, I thought some tiny person had been crushed by a PC tower. As in a computer tower.

    I am so SMRT!

    Azi
    "If you don't want to work, become a reporter. That awful power, the public opinion of the nation, was created by a horde of self-complacent simpletons who failed at ditch digging and shoemaking and fetched up journalism on their way to the poorhouse."
    Mark Twain 1881

  9. #9
    Praefectus Fabrum Senior Member Anime BlackJack Champion, Flash Poker Champion, Word Up Champion, Shape Game Champion, Snake Shooter Champion, Fishwater Challenge Champion, Rocket Racer MX Champion, Jukebox Hero Champion, My House Is Bigger Than Your House Champion, Funky Pong Champion, Cutie Quake Champion, Fling The Cow Champion, Tiger Punch Champion, Virus Champion, Solitaire Champion, Worm Race Champion, Rope Walker Champion, Penguin Pass Champion, Skate Park Champion, Watch Out Champion, Lawn Pac Champion, Weapons Of Mass Destruction Champion, Skate Boarder Champion, Lane Bowling Champion, Bugz Champion, Makai Grand Prix 2 Champion, White Van Man Champion, Parachute Panic Champion, BlackJack Champion, Stans Ski Jumping Champion, Smaugs Treasure Champion, Sofa Longjump Champion Seamus Fermanagh's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Location
    Latibulm mali regis in muris.
    Posts
    11,454

    Default Re: PC Strikes Again?

    Quote Originally Posted by Papewaio
    Wheres the link... James Lovell of the Ministry of Fun... looks more like a April Fools joke then a real thing.
    Pappy:

    MofF is in Whitehall, two blocks NE of the Ministry of Silly Walks.

    Seamus
    "The only way that has ever been discovered to have a lot of people cooperate together voluntarily is through the free market. And that's why it's so essential to preserving individual freedom.” -- Milton Friedman

    "The urge to save humanity is almost always a false front for the urge to rule." -- H. L. Mencken

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO