Translation for all you squares:
Salutations, allow me to introduce myself, regardless of the fact that I need no introduction. The pseudonym that I use is "Devastatin Dave." I would like to personally acknowledge my admiration for an eminent group of people who have bestowed upon me service of a superlative quality finer than currency could purchase. Take note, dear sirs, as I demonstrate my gratification for the service that my beloved progeny received at the "Barber Shop."
This gentleman was truly "au courant" if you are able to comprehend my fine analogy, yet it is of no consequence if you are not able to grasp this, as this gentleman could tailor and sculpt human follicles with such velocity and transcendent aptitude as not witnessed by man in his piteously concise but indubitably eventful history. My covenant is perspicuously compulsory, you pathetic feminine canines.
I have therefore, fashioned this particular thread for the sole raison d'être that my fellow contemporaries at the ORG may articulate erudite and eloquent exaltations concerning matters of their particular environs…last part to be left untranslated…
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