I have to say, it's been nearly impossible to get a martini here.

I have asked on five ocassions, differently, trying to adapt how I ask so I get a real martini but all of my attempts to order one have failed. I always ask, and then I get a few shots of that awful vermouth concoction, Martini (the brand name, the terrible vermouth that tastes like toothpaste). What's up? I've been to bars, clubs, and pubs, and I've even tried to tell them what to put in it, but they just looked at me confused and gave me the toothpaste.

I had to buy my bombay and noilly in one of those chain wine shops.