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Thread: King Arthur (The movie)

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    German Enthusiast Member Alexanderofmacedon's Avatar
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    Default King Arthur (The movie)

    Friend let me borrow it and I'm going to watch it, but first I have to take a shower. I'll check to see what you guys say after I take a shower...

    Otherwise, just discuss the movie (what you liked/didn't like)


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    Old Town Road Senior Member Strike For The South's Avatar
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    Default Re: King Arthur (The movie)

    maybe the most historicly accurate movie Ive seen.
    There, but for the grace of God, goes John Bradford

    My aim, then, was to whip the rebels, to humble their pride, to follow them to their inmost recesses, and make them fear and dread us. Fear is the beginning of wisdom.

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    Member Member Sardo's Avatar
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    Default Re: King Arthur (The movie)

    AARRGH!!!









    Don't ask me to explain further, I get all agitated just thinking about this monstrosity. I'd give myself a heart attack actually talking about it.
    Yes, 'traumatic' doesn't even come close to describing my experience.

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    Nobody expects the Senior Member Lemur's Avatar
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    Default Re: King Arthur (The movie)

    Last time I tried to discuss the historical accuracy of a film in here, I got kicked out and thrown into the Monastary. Tough crowd.

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    Dux Nova Scotia Member lars573's Avatar
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    Default Re: King Arthur (The movie)

    It's about as accurate as the versions where they wear full plate armour and fight dragons.
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    Oni Member Samurai Waki's Avatar
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    Default Re: King Arthur (The movie)

    Utter Crap. They should've called it Guenivere.

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    Narcissist Member Zalmoxis's Avatar
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    Default Re: King Arthur (The movie)

    It's so... inacurate. Well, also the fact that somehow 6 guys on horses charged straight at several hundred and weren't even hurt.
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    Nobody expects the Senior Member Lemur's Avatar
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    Default Re: King Arthur (The movie)

    If I learned nothing else from Lord of the Rings, it was this: Small bands of cavalry charging into massed infantry will always win. I'm not sure how or why, but that's how it works. Especially if it's toward the end of the movie.

    You can pick apart the rest of the film all you like, but it's now an established fact that a smaller force of mounted warriors will always pwn in a frontal charge on heavy infantry.


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    Humbled Father Member Duke of Gloucester's Avatar
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    Default Re: King Arthur (The movie)

    Alex. Check the DVD box and if you see the words "staring Keira Knightley" then you know the film will be rubbish. (Bend it like Beckham is an exception)
    We all learn from experience. Unfortunately we don't all learn as much as we should.

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    Senior Member Senior Member Red Peasant's Avatar
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    Default Re: King Arthur (The movie)

    Quote Originally Posted by Lemurmania
    If I learned nothing else from Lord of the Rings, it was this: Small bands of cavalry charging into massed infantry will always win. I'm not sure how or why, but that's how it works. Especially if it's toward the end of the movie.

    You can pick apart the rest of the film all you like, but it's now an established fact that a smaller force of mounted warriors will always pwn in a frontal charge on heavy infantry.

    ?
    I disagree. It depends on the circumstances. In The Return of the King didn't some 10,000 Rohirrim attack the orcs at Minas Tirith? That's a hell of a cavalry force, and they clearly show the orcish infantry panicking = cavalry win almost every time. Those orcs had probably never had to sustain a massed cavalry attack on that scale = very scary.

    Anyway, they're only films. If the script, plot and characterization are ok then bugger the inaccuracies, enjoy! However, I thought that King Arthur was a bit lacking in these departments. Then again, some films just have a certain charisma, like Excalibur.
    Last edited by Red Peasant; 01-21-2006 at 12:00.
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    Member Member ah_dut's Avatar
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    Default Re: King Arthur (The movie)

    King Arthur was rubbish beyond all compare. It is, was and always shall be in my opinion complete rubbish. I'm sure they put a lot of work into it but I was bored...even with a scantily clad Keira Knightly...and that's a bad sign

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    Come to daddy Member Geoffrey S's Avatar
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    Default Re: King Arthur (The movie)

    I loved it. Very nicely paced and a most entertaining movie. Shame that Clive Owen didn't quite cut it in the lead role.

    It reminded me a lot of Thirteenth Warrior, in a good way.
    "The facts of history cannot be purely objective, since they become facts of history only in virtue of the significance attached to them by the historian." E.H. Carr

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    Old Town Road Senior Member Strike For The South's Avatar
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    Default Re: King Arthur (The movie)

    Quote Originally Posted by Duke of Gloucester
    (Bend it like Beckham is an exception)
    no its not
    There, but for the grace of God, goes John Bradford

    My aim, then, was to whip the rebels, to humble their pride, to follow them to their inmost recesses, and make them fear and dread us. Fear is the beginning of wisdom.

    I am tired and sick of war. Its glory is all moonshine. It is only those who have neither fired a shot nor heard the shrieks and groans of the wounded who cry aloud for blood, for vengeance, for desolation.

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    Senior Member Senior Member Red Peasant's Avatar
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    Default Re: King Arthur (The movie)

    Quote Originally Posted by strike for the south
    no its not
    That's because you're from Texas and you probably like gay American football.

    I liked the quote from the film Full Metal Jacket by the drill sergeant:

    "Only queers and steers come from Texas, boy!"
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    Old Town Road Senior Member Strike For The South's Avatar
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    Default Re: King Arthur (The movie)

    Quote Originally Posted by Red Peasant
    "Only queers and steers come from Texas, boy!"
    Only steers and queers.
    There, but for the grace of God, goes John Bradford

    My aim, then, was to whip the rebels, to humble their pride, to follow them to their inmost recesses, and make them fear and dread us. Fear is the beginning of wisdom.

    I am tired and sick of war. Its glory is all moonshine. It is only those who have neither fired a shot nor heard the shrieks and groans of the wounded who cry aloud for blood, for vengeance, for desolation.

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    Not affiliated with Red Dwarf. Member Ianofsmeg16's Avatar
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    Default Re: King Arthur (The movie)

    An alright movie, but about as historically accurate as Gladiator....

    but the thing about Gladiator, it was an A+++ movie, King Arthur is more of a C
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    Bringing down the vulgaroisie Member King Henry V's Avatar
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    Default Re: King Arthur (The movie)

    Well at least it was better than the fairy tale Arthur films, although there you're not constantly thinking "That's not true". The tortures of being a history buff!
    But why does Hollywood have to get everything wrong? From the date, to Pelagius' death, to the fact that there still Sarmatian auxiliaries when the Roman Empire was so weak it couln't even defend its borders let alone venture into barbarian territory to take a few boys to fight for them. Pathetic.
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    Senior Member Senior Member Red Peasant's Avatar
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    Default Re: King Arthur (The movie)

    Quote Originally Posted by strike for the south
    Only steers and queers.
    Lol. Nice one Strike, you've got that GSOH thing. I'm sure Texas is a fine place. One of my fave Texans, despite his faults, was LBJ.
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    Bringing down the vulgaroisie Member King Henry V's Avatar
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    Default Re: King Arthur (The movie)

    Why couldn't they just have filmed the Warlord Trilogy? That would have been perfect.
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    Come to daddy Member Geoffrey S's Avatar
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    Default Re: King Arthur (The movie)

    Quote Originally Posted by King Henry V
    Why couldn't they just have filmed the Warlord Trilogy? That would have been perfect.
    Agreed, they're perfect movie material. But despite its historical faults, which were annoying at times I admit, I rather enjoyed the movie.
    "The facts of history cannot be purely objective, since they become facts of history only in virtue of the significance attached to them by the historian." E.H. Carr

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    1000 post member club Member Quid's Avatar
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    Default Re: King Arthur (The movie)

    I enjoyed it. Seen better but it was good enough for me...it's a film, after all.

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    German Enthusiast Member Alexanderofmacedon's Avatar
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    Default Re: King Arthur (The movie)

    I watched it on DVD, where it stated that King Arthur may have happened 1000 years earlier in real life. The movie is just a different version of the tale. It said scientists agree, it is a distinct possibility...

    I think it could be possible...


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    Arrogant Ashigaru Moderator Ludens's Avatar
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    Lightbulb Re: King Arthur (The movie)

    Quote Originally Posted by Alexanderofmacedon
    I watched it on DVD, where it stated that King Arthur may have happened 1000 years earlier in real life. The movie is just a different version of the tale. It said scientists agree, it is a distinct possibility...

    I think it could be possible...
    Nope. Lucius Artorius Castus and his Sarmatians auxillaries did exist, and they fought of a Pictish invasion, but that was over a century before the Saxon invasions, which BTW didn't take place at Hadrian's wall. I never saw the movie - I took one look at the poster and decided I wouldn't like it: it featured Arthur and (I assume) Lancelot in what looked like Medieval plate-mail and Guinevere in a outfit that would have her die of exposure in the Scottish highlands. It seems Hollywood can't reach historical accuracy even when they try.
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    Bringing down the vulgaroisie Member King Henry V's Avatar
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    Default Re: King Arthur (The movie)

    And when they set it the Romans had long departed from Britain. And I have no idea what Cerdic, King Of Wessex (and my possible ancestor) was doing that far north...
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    Sovereign Oppressor Member TIE Fighter Shooter Champion, Turkey Shoot Champion, Juggler Champion Kralizec's Avatar
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    Default Re: King Arthur (The movie)

    King Arthur sucked. Not because of the historical inaccuracies, I can deal with that. I liked Gladiator and Braveheart, and could stomach Troy. I can't stomach this piece of shit.

    Here's a "review" about the King Arthur Knight Vision Trivia from the directors cut that I stole from another forum.

    Knight Vision is a series of trivia that pop up during the directors cut of King Arthur. Only ten minutes in and it's history is even worse than the films itself. Not every piece of trivia is commented on. Here's my running commentary:

    First couple comments are copied from another Arthurian messageboard:

    Although the historical stuff is pretty obvious. Like "Armed soldiers on horseback are called cavalry". "80 Roman miles is about 73 modern miles, which was the length of Hadrians Wall"

    Now those nice little Knight vision facts are telling me that the Woads are supposed to be Picts which really makes the whole damn movie contradictory for the Pretani noted by the Greeks which seem to be the basis for the films Woads were not British at all, like the characters in this movie claim. They were Picts! And the "Woad" language is a combination of Scottish and old Welsh!

    Oh, wow, now they told me Latin was the language of the roman empire. What a revelation!

    Now it is saying the legends about Joeseph of Aramethea in Britain are true.

    Oh god, it actually claims that the Saxons did invade fromt he north!

    "Some claim that Merlin was a prophet Myrddin who moved Stonehenge from Ireland to England."
    Oh god....
    Merlin was the name Geoffrey used for Myrddin because Myrddin was to close to Merde for his liking, and yes there is a legend of Merlin moving stonehenge from Ireland to England, but those are two completley different thoughts! No one has ever claimed that Myrddin brought Stonehenge from Ireland to England!

    An ambush is a sudden attack made forma concealed position? Really? Wow, I never knew that! rolleyes

    Tristans tatoos were inspired by Mongolian warriors? Wow, bet there were a lot of them serving with Sarmation Cavalry at Hadrians Wall.

    Skarssgaard (or however you spell that) cape was made out of Bison hide? Bison hide?! Now that's authentic.

    Roman soldiers produced offspring with local Britains? Really? And here I thought soldiers became celebate when they joined the army.

    Finally they point out a mistake in the movie. Nothing to do witht he hsitory though, oh no, couldn't have that. Knightleys hand heald 6-8 weeks too quickly.

    Falconry is the sport of hunting with Falcons? Yet another revelation! Last they could have done is mentioned why Tristan has the falcon. At least inform people on that one tiny bit of Arthurian legend.

    Wow, a mention of Cretien de Troyes. They do not, however, mention that he's the first known guy to use Lancelot. Nooo, that would hurt their "This is how it happened" line....

    Hey, Keira Knightly and Natalie Portman look similar! It's true, the pop-up said so! No one ever noticed that before, not ever!

    Humans sleep about 8 hours a night? Really? No, I refuse to believe it.

    Woads were inspired by the real-life tribe of the Picts? Well, you've already said that, and I've already pointed out a couple problems with that (the Pretani and Picts being totally different, and the Picts not being British but, um Picts) but maybe I should add that THE PICTS AND ROMANO-BRITISH WERE ENEMIES!

    Ooooohhhhhhh, Bors is riding the same horse that Russell Crowe did in Gladiator. That's kinda... well, useless trivia that might be kinda cool if you are a horse fanatic. And all the horses were lodged with other horses fromt he same geographic area due to laws regarding horses rights? Ireland has laws regarding horses rights? Who'da known?

    Hey, Barbarians sacked Rome in the early 5th century. They could have said "Visigoths" and "410". It wouldn't have taken all that much more work.

    The frozen lake in this movie was actually gravel? Well now, that actually is a cool bit of trivia. huh.

    Ancient Sarmation Cavalry invented the English longbow? Jeez, that's a surprise (well, tehy don't really say that, but they do say that 5,000 longbows were used for the film, and only the sarmations use them).

    Flag standards were used to identify people? No! Never! I REFUSE TO BELIEVE IT!

    What do figure skating Swedes from 3000BC have to do with this movie?

    Hans Zimmer won and academy award for the Lion King, yet they still left the best song in this entire damn movie off the soundtrack! You know, the one Bors', um, consort sings about going home.

    250 years of peace in the last 3500? What BS is this? Where the hell could you get the information for this grand statement? Did the production crew for this film have some sort of objective, all knowing manuscript which details every war in every continent for the past 3500 years? Would have been smarter for them to say that there was only 1 day in all of the twentieth century during which no declared war was taking place. That, at elast, can be verified.

    Italian-Roman women had the same status as children? True, Roman culture was very male centric, but I don't recall learning of many Italian-Roman children owning and running their own buisnesses....

    Hadrians Wall was built by Hadrian? What insights this is giving me!

    6.4 calories per minute per passionate kiss. Huh. I feel like exercising, where is Tanya?

    Cupid was the Roman god of love? Not at the time this movie was set!

    What, no mention of the Pendragon standard he has? No note at all about it being there, or, (god forbid) it's meaning? Damn pop-ups....

    Roman Generals were schooled in battle? I sure hope so!

    Wow, a note which contradicts the movie! How did they sneak that in? 'Course they don't go so far as to completley contradict the movie, jsut saying that Roman troops started pulling out of Britain in 402, not sayign they were gone in 410 when the Visigoths sacked rome, long before this movie supposedly takes place.

    The final battle took place in the same field as parts of Braveheart were filmed. Braveheart was an awesome movie. I glorify in that movie. I do not glorify in this movie.

    A Knight is the modern Equivalant of a Sherman Tank? I never heard that in my tenth grade history class, nope, not a once.

    It was considered bad luck for a Saxon sword to be drawn and not used. I did not know that. That's two things out of the last two hours I found interesting....

    War drums were used to intimadate enemies? Who were these written for, 8 year olds? You have to be 18 to buy the bloody DVD!

    The origin of King Arthur is also portrayed in The Sword and the Stone. Jeez, you'd never guess that Disney made this movie, would you?

    The legendary Arthur fought twelve great battles?
    No, the Legendary Arthur fought thirteen. It's just that the thirteenth was The Battle of Camlann. Meaning that, despite what you say mr. Kngiht Visions, Baddonw as not his final legendary battle.

    The battle of Baddon Hill in the movie is based on the historical Battle of Baddon Hill? Really? I don't believe you. I really don't. It may share the same name, but other thn that....

    Shields are both offensive and defensive weaponry. Another surprise. Really, I didn't know that. No, really, why do you think I'm being sarcastic? Oh, right, because I am.

    A large Roman catapault... blah blah blah. These arn't catapaults, they are trebuchets, and the design used in this movie wouldn't have been invented for a hell of a long time after this movie is set!

    Re-enactors are called experimental archeologists? I know a few re-enactors and I've never heard a single one refer to him/herself in that way.

    Tristan is the sexiest man in Denmark is he? Well, good for him.

    A retired Nay Seal trained all the extras to fight as if they were 5th century warriars? Um, does anyone see what connection a modern day SEAL has with a Saxon warriar? Anybody?

    HAHAHAHA, this entire film is based upon an essay some college student forgot at the school library and Franzini found. Explains so much....

    This final battle took 5 weeks to shoot? Sure doesn't look it.

    Some Roman forts had hospitals? Jeez, and here I thought they jsut tossed the wounded outside to die.

    Lancelot and Guinevere have an affair in some Arthurian Legends? That's crazy talk.

    Arthur is supposed to be buried in Glastonbury abbey. Supposed is such a strong, inapropriate word.....

    King Arthur reigned in Camelot, according to legend? Now these guys are just getting lazy.

    Wow, another pop-up that contradicts the movie, saying that modern attempts at placing Camelot place it at South Cadbury. Two in the entire movie. These guys have some balls rolleyes

    Arthur is called the once and future king becuase legend has it he will rule again? No one could figure that out on there own from the line "The Once and Future King"?

  26. #26
    Bringing down the vulgaroisie Member King Henry V's Avatar
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    Default Re: King Arthur (The movie)

    Is that talking about the director's commentary on the dvd?
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    "Where men are forbidden to honour a king they honour millionaires, athletes, or film-stars instead: even famous prostitutes or gangsters. For spiritual nature, like bodily nature, will be served; deny it food and it will gobble poison." - C. S. Lewis

  27. #27
    probably bored Member BDC's Avatar
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    Default Re: King Arthur (The movie)

    Ancient Sarmation Cavalry invented the English longbow? Jeez, that's a surprise
    It's so easy to use those 6 foot bows on horseback after all.

  28. #28

    Default Re: King Arthur (The movie)

    I'll kick this movie while it's down, too. I hated it. Being gagged with a rusty, chipped spoon would be preferable to watching it again.

  29. #29
    Insomniac and tired of it Senior Member Slyspy's Avatar
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    Default Re: King Arthur (The movie)

    It was not so bad as a fantasy Arthur series of books which I read. I forget the author (a female American I believe but the name escapes me) but at one point a main character sat down to a meal consisting of rabbit and potatoes. Now you can use all the magic, legend and mysticism you want in such a novel since they were never real, solid objects in the first place. But at least get the groundwork correct!

    Oh and the llamas (I think they were supposed to be camels) in Troy were worse than any inaccuracies in Arthur, even worse than Knightley's combat bikini.

    PS

    That cut-and-paste of a review of a DVD extra really is no basis for criticism of the film itself. Especially considering that the critic thought Braveheart was "awsome". Also he seems to be confused between references to history and to the making of the film.
    Last edited by Slyspy; 01-23-2006 at 15:50.
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  30. #30
    Member Member Sardo's Avatar
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    Default Re: King Arthur (The movie)

    There were llamas in Troy? Where?

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