Movie Review Thread

**Banquo's Ghost** · 10-03-2009, 09:09

Creation.

A gentle, thoughtful film very well acted and written. It tells the story of Charles Darwin as he comes towards the moment where "Origin of Species" is finally finished, but doesn't dwell much on the science or the theory itself. The story rather, examines the internal struggle of the man and the strain his ideas place on his marriage with Emma, a deeply religious woman who feels her world collapsing at her own husband's hand. In this, the script is an allegory of the greater cataclysm in thought to come once the book is published.

This storm of emotion centres around Darwin's most beloved child, Annie, and his guilt about her fate. Is it connected with his own struggle with God and loss of faith, or worse still, his understanding now developed that marriage with his first cousin may have created risks for their offspring? I found it a deeply religious story, exploring the eternal themes of faith and loss - and how one faces the challenge of the reality of the world and tragedy.

It's a very human film, bringing gargantuan themes down to a family in crisis. Subtle, beautifully filmed - perhaps slow if you don't like lengthy character development and understated dialogue about ideas (remember, this is a Victorian family setting). It relies on unannounced flashbacks, with only small visual clues to define the new frame, which is mildly confusing at first but brings great power to the themes as they develop.

Darwin is my great hero, and I was afraid of the usual historical aberrations - but the film is pretty faithful, with just one or two minor manipulations. Paul Bettany holds the film very well indeed as the tortured Darwin, without allowing sentimentality to take over - except at the two moments it was necessary, which had me in tears.

I can greatly recommend this film - I understand it is not going to be distributed everywhere (hopefully that will change) but see it if you can.

**Ibrahim** · 10-03-2009, 21:25

Cool as Ice

another typical promotional video, this time of Vanilla ice (do such people really exist?). The man is a bad actor, is way too corny, and the story is stilted and senseless, with no imagination, no wit, no reason. I am still suffering a headache from all the falcepalms I did regarding the movie, and am suffering from the "hanger to the face" feeling from the sheer stupidity of it, as well as the last move I reviewed (Alone in the dark). I recommend that all people avoid the movie, so as not to suffer from its ill effects.

I seem to get into the habit of seeing

movies. and of course the nostalgia critic (see above) usually turns out to agree with me.

rating: 0/10

**Hax** · 10-03-2009, 22:25

Gabriel (2007, Australia; Religious Sci-Fi/Horror)

+ Some interesting martial action
+ Very nice special effects for their budget

- Incredibly lame plot
- Overall bad acting
- Plain characters
- Unoriginal
- Did I mention the plot was bad?

Okay, let's get this out of the way first. I might be biased, because I don't follow the Christian faith. However, the movie on its own was horrible. Gabriel is about the epic battle between Angels and Demons (sorry) over control of purgatory. But seriously, why the hell did they choose this incredibly lame idea. I have to be honest, the special effects and fighting scenes had some pretty good moments (although the latter resembled The Matrix a lot on several occasions).

The movie is about the Arch-Angel Gabriel (called Arcs in the movie, for some reason) who was sent by God (who isn't even mention by name in the entire movie, to regain control over Purgatory which has been lost to the Fallen Angels! Oh no! Those Arcs that are still alive have gone into hiding and are laying low at the moment, with the lady (there has to be a lady ;-;) being forced to work as a prostitute after she decided to go after the main bad guy (and lost). Of course, he saves her, they have sex, same old same old. The movie ends with this horrible plot twist (horrible being incredibly lame, not gasp-provoking horrible. Well, perhaps for the incredible lameness) and of course, good wins. End good all good, whatever.

The only thing that was somewhat likeable was the fact that Gabriel (after seeing his allies die) flips out and goes on a killing spree. That was slightly interesting, but for the love of God, the rest of the movie was so unoriginal. The plot-twist is visible from about 15 minutes into the movie, and it gets quite a drag seeing Gabriel talk to his allies, proceed to mate with his girly-girlfriend (did I mention they're angels), killing the baddies. After 30 minutes, I started to do something else, because I got the general message.

If you like good action scenes with some gore and a plot that could have been created by a retarted monkey, this movie is for you. I recommend watching it with your girlfriend, you've got enough time to make out and cover her eyes not to despoil her innocence by the foul images that will inevitably flood the screen after some thirty minutes.

For some reason, film-makers see this as a formula that is bound to work:

1) Hero goes to a place
2) Place is in a bad shape, hero inquires with allies (and possibly girlfriend)
3) Hero starts to kill/destroy/demolish the evil people
4) Things are looking up, movie speeds up
5) Out of revenge, the main evil guy kills the hero's allies, which...
6) Make things seem bad, but...
7) In the end, hero kills villain, hero and girlfriend live, everything works out happily ever after.

That's my first review of the horror movies I saw.

Next up: Chakushin Ari (One Missed Call, Japanese version)

**Decker** · 10-04-2009, 23:08

Zombieland - It was a lot better than I thought it was going to be. I laughed pretty much through most if not all of the movie. It also did a very good job at getting a very packed theater to jump and scream despite being a comdey, it also had some moment of in your face... gore (ala Ingoreous Basterds) which was done well but also made you laugh at the same time. And I'll have to say that I have become even more disgusted with twinkies after watching that movie

There were only two things that really had me scratching my head. One was that there were quite a few times where they wasted a decent amount of ammunition when they found it... but again it was a comedy and did not really emphasize on serious survival.
9/10

**Ibrahim** · 10-12-2009, 23:42

If I may Hax, I'll do a corollary to your review, which I more than agree with.

Originally Posted by Hax

Gabriel (2007, Australia; Religious Sci-Fi/Horror)

+ Some interesting martial action
+ Very nice special effects for their budget

- Incredibly lame plot
- Overall bad acting
- Plain characters
- Unoriginal
- Did I mention the plot was bad?

Okay, let's get this out of the way first. I might be biased, because I don't follow the Christian faith.

well, cruddy movies are all over the place. I'm not surprised you dug this piece of **** up in Sci-Fi. was it directed by Uwe Boll?

as to the bias part: in a nutshell: you aren't really biased.

However, the movie on its own was horrible. Gabriel is about the epic battle between Angels and Demons (sorry) over control of purgatory. But seriously, why the hell did they choose this incredibly lame idea. I have to be honest, the special effects and fighting scenes had some pretty good moments (although the latter resembled The Matrix a lot on several occasions).

you should see alone in the dark-a lame reared culture that leaves behind a bunch of zool style monsters, and a crazy paranormal investigator, played by christian slater, who is about as good an actor in this one as that monotone voice on my Windows XP is a good Opera singer.

The movie is about the Arch-Angel Gabriel (called Arcs in the movie, for some reason) who was sent by God (who isn't even mention by name in the entire movie, to regain control over Purgatory which has been lost to the Fallen Angels! Oh no! Those Arcs that are still alive have gone into hiding and are laying low at the moment, with the lady (there has to be a lady ;-;) being forced to work as a prostitute after she decided to go after the main bad guy (and lost). Of course, he saves her, they have sex, same old same old. The movie ends with this horrible plot twist (horrible being incredibly lame, not gasp-provoking horrible. Well, perhaps for the incredible lameness) and of course, good wins. End good all good, whatever.

now I must question the sanity of the producer, the director, the writers, and anybody directly involved overall. Angels bunging with mortals?

The only thing that was somewhat likeable was the fact that Gabriel (after seeing his allies die) flips out and goes on a killing spree. That was slightly interesting, but for the love of God, the rest of the movie was so unoriginal. The plot-twist is visible from about 15 minutes into the movie, and it gets quite a drag seeing Gabriel talk to his allies, proceed to mate with his girly-girlfriend (did I mention they're angels), killing the baddies. After 30 minutes, I started to do something else, because I got the general message.

yeah, the anthropomorphic principle applied to beings that aren't even human-certain people are retarded that way.

If you like good action scenes with some gore and a plot that could have been created by a retarted monkey, this movie is for you. I recommend watching it with your girlfriend, you've got enough time to make out and cover her eyes not to despoil her innocence by the foul images that will inevitably flood the screen after some thirty minutes.

I agree about the girlfriend part, but at least it was written by a retarded monkey-hey, it could have been a crazy horse, a retarded donkey, or a mad cow.

For some reason, film-makers see this as a formula that is bound to work:

1) Hero goes to a place
2) Place is in a bad shape, hero inquires with allies (and possibly girlfriend)
3) Hero starts to kill/destroy/demolish the evil people
4) Things are looking up, movie speeds up
5) Out of revenge, the main evil guy kills the hero's allies, which...
6) Make things seem bad, but...
7) In the end, hero kills villain, hero and girlfriend live, everything works out happily ever after.

That's my first review of the horror movies I saw.

Next up: Chakushin Ari (One Missed Call, Japanese version)[/

because most directors are stupid and unimaginative. and to quote Kyle justin: "they want a quick-buck for this ****-load of **** "

so in short: the plot sucks, the producers have no brains, they are clearly out to make a quick buck, and I hate Christian Slater's acting.

**Hooahguy** · 10-26-2009, 17:36

anyone see Law-abiding citizen?

**Mouzafphaerre** · 10-28-2009, 12:02

.
Malena

Ironically hilarious, not to mention Monica Belluci.

.

**Alexander the Pretty Good** · 11-01-2009, 03:09

Monsters vs. Aliens

Surprisingly good for a Dreamworks summer offering. Relies heavily on you appreciating the cast (who are excellent though maybe predictable - or as predictable as you could get with Hugh Laurie as a mad scientist who turns himself into a cockroach).

I went into this with low expectations, though.

8/10