Foolishness

**TheSilverKnight** · 02-20-2006, 04:46

Never cook (American) bacon without a shirt on

Always use shaving cream unless you are using a small electric razor to do a few touch-ups

Do not attempt to break up cat-fights (between cats, girls, or girl cats)

Never stick your finger on a fork that's been left in a pot of pasta that's been left to boil/simmer for a few moments...

**Lemur** · 02-20-2006, 05:01

Don't take any dietary supplements because your wife says "You ought to take these." I forget what the evil substance was, but I fell over with a fever, my body turned bright red, and I wondered if I was going to die. When I recovered, I found that the stuff warned that all of this might happen in tiny print on a giant piece of paper folded inside the box.

This lemur has been very cautious about vitamins/supplements ever since. Now I wish I could remember what that stuff was ...

**Samurai Waki** · 02-20-2006, 07:29

When shooting a pistol, never put your thumb on the hammer (tore my thumb off my hand when I was 15 and had to have it reattached)... Don't think I've shot a pistol since.

**Ja'chyra** · 02-20-2006, 10:11

Oh so many:

Never check the chamfer on the piece of steel you just milled with your thumb - Lost tip of finger

Never cycle home after 6 double vodka's - broken shoulder

Never push your mums shopping down the conveyor belt in Tesco's - 3" Scar on right palm

Magnets on TV screens make pretty colours but don't do much for the picture afterwards - New TV

And not forgetting the old favourite, if it looks too high/far/heavy/wide/deep then it probably is.

In my defence most of these were when I was younger, let's hope age brings the much vaunted wisdom

Maybe the best, or worst, was someone I worked with:

When you wear a harness it's better to clip it on rather than fall 75 foot hitting a girder every 6 feet - Broken Back

**Scurvy** · 02-23-2006, 19:56

never walk into to one of those automatic doors when theres a "closed sign" outside, it really hurts....

**Geoffrey S** · 02-23-2006, 20:15

When driving around Greece in a bus two years ago with school whenever I stood up I hit my head on the bagage rack above me. Would have thought I'd learn after the first few times, but no.

Chap in my year skates a lot, but had grown somewhat during the holidays which changes the necessary technique. Not once, but twice when taking a bend he stabbed himself in the back of the foot with his other skate, the second time rather deeply; can't skate for a while now.

**Jubilation T Cornpone** · 02-23-2006, 22:30

When replacing the power switch for the electric shower, always make sure there isn't a seperate fuse switch for it, maybe hidden up above the mains switch for the rest of the electric appliances. If you fail this simple test then at least don't pull the switch box over the exposed wires which brings them into contact with each other. If you fail that test then whatever you do, try and miss the sink on your way backwards across the bathroom....

**BigTex** · 02-23-2006, 22:33

Never place a suadering iron near a plastic gasoline can.

Always make sure the morter tube for fireworks is on a stable platform.

Never fire 2 artilery (fireworks) rounds off at the same time from the same platform.

Always make sure there are no drunken peoples with lighters near the bags of fireworks.

God bless the 4th of July.