Bad Analogies

**Zalmoxis** · 03-05-2006, 09:10

Horrible... I'm gonna go read happy things now.

**doc_bean** · 03-05-2006, 11:24

Most are pretty bad, but funny however, the one ajaxfetish already pointed out:

Her date was pleasant enough, but she knew that if her life was a movie this guy would be burried in the credits as something like "Second Tall Man."

is pretty awesome when used in the right context, the teacher who submitted that obviously has no love for creativity and probably rates anything a C are blow if it doesn't sound like Dickens or Shakespeare

**Duke Malcolm** · 03-05-2006, 13:40

Some of them are damned imaginitive...

My favourite:

Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36pm traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19pm at a speed of 35 mph.

I don't get this one, though:

The politician was gone but unnoticed, like the period after the Dr. on a Dr. Pepper can.

There shouldn't be a full stop after Dr on a Dr Pepper can, anyway...

**Proletariat** · 03-05-2006, 16:36

A few of those are actually the mark of a funny writer, and not a complete idiot, as the list would imply. At least I hope those students aren't so intentionally stupid.

**English assassin** · 03-07-2006, 19:50

Her date was pleasant enough, but she knew that if her life was a movie this guy would be burried in the credits as something like "Second Tall Man."

This one isn't so much an analogy as a short story brilliantly compressed into one sentence.

Who was First Tall Man? Will there be a Third Tall man? What does she do with all these tall men? What's she got against medium sized men, anyway? Was she engaged to one, only to find he was seeing her younger, prettier sister on the side? Or, Oh my god, it was, wasn't it, her BROTHER?

I's got to know.

BTW your Grace, (1) I salute your (100% accurate) knowledge of the abuses of the full stop but (2) why are you not a King any more? has there been a revolution or did you decide Dukes have more fun?

**Avicenna** · 03-09-2006, 14:47

Originally Posted by Proletariat

A few of those are actually the mark of a funny writer, and not a complete idiot, as the list would imply. At least I hope those students aren't so intentionally stupid.

That would make them actually stupid.