Well, i'm back. Sort of.

[Samurai Waki]

I know how you feel. Everyday the world gets a little darker, the blood in your veins turns to acid; the hatred, rage, and complete utter sadness are the only things you feel, coupled with the void you feel somewhere in your head. Its the warrior spirit mate, a blood lust, a passionate yearning to be somewhere else, or to transcend your physical being, because the life you had in this world is not the one you are meant for...
But, it is and you don't realize that yet. I fought myself day and night and day all over again for five years, because I knew in my heart at the time that things should be different. I had money, I had cars, I had girls but it was never enough to satiate my hunger. Having nothing and being young and depressed is the same as having everything and being young and depressed. Because you know in your mind that this is not the way and it never will be.

But, you grow older and if you defeat it, become stronger and wiser than you have ever been before. The lessons you are learning are the hardest you will ever take, because you are always walking the fine line between life and death and one slip could send you reeling into oblivion. Take the chance now to correct it, if you have rage punching something (not living) until your nuckles are swollen and bleeding will correct that, if you are sad no matter of happiness will ever be enough, turn that into guile and build yourself a fortune. If you are irritated read a book, or take up tailoring or something that takes a long time to do, and you will have learned patience. When you have done that for a long enough time, you will have killed yourself, but not the person you were planning on killing, the depression itself. And no matter what, wave after wave of misfortune and bad luck can never dissuade you, and depression will fuel your ambition. Those of us that do suffer from it and that have been to the very abyss of the human mind know that status quo is never good enough, you become something great, maybe for even one person, or not at all. It is your decision, be sure to choose wisely...

One more bit of advice I can give you: Never let yourself be silent.

[Kagemusha]

I know how you feel. Everyday the world gets a little darker, the blood in your veins turns to acid; the hatred, rage, and complete utter sadness are the only things you feel, coupled with the void you feel somewhere in your head. Its the warrior spirit mate, a blood lust, a passionate yearning to be somewhere else, or to transcend your physical being, because the life you had in this world is not the one you are meant for...
But, it is and you don't realize that yet. I fought myself day and night and day all over again for five years, because I knew in my heart at the time that things should be different. I had money, I had cars, I had girls but it was never enough to satiate my hunger. Having nothing and being young and depressed is the same as having everything and being young and depressed. Because you know in your mind that this is not the way and it never will be.

But, you grow older and if you defeat it, become stronger and wiser than you have ever been before. The lessons you are learning are the hardest you will ever take, because you are always walking the fine line between life and death and one slip could send you reeling into oblivion. Take the chance now to correct it, if you have rage punching something (not living) until your nuckles are swollen and bleeding will correct that, if you are sad no matter of happiness will ever be enough, turn that into guile and build yourself a fortune. If you are irritated read a book, or take up tailoring or something that takes a long time to do, and you will have learned patience. When you have done that for a long enough time, you will have killed yourself, but not the person you were planning on killing, the depression itself. And no matter what, wave after wave of misfortune and bad luck can never dissuade you, and depression will fuel your ambition. Those of us that do suffer from it and that have been to the very abyss of the human mind know that status quo is never good enough, you become something great, maybe for even one person, or not at all. It is your decision, be sure to choose wisely...

One more bit of advice I can give you: Never let yourself be silent.

Wakizashi that is one of the best posts i have ever read on this Forum.

[KukriKhan]

You know my feelings from the last time.

At the very least, get some light. Preferably sunlight, but any bright light will do. And do anything that will make you breathe deeply.

Sitting in a dark room, breathing shallowly, will eventually make anyone dark and brooding.

That part of you that you think craves "end", doesn't really; it's just trying to trick you. And it isn't "you". You possess ideas and feelings... but they don't possess you. You're in charge, even when you think you're not.

Be well. Do something for someone else; especially some random act of kindness. And keep in touch. We care.