heheh, be my guest! I don't think I made being a Confederate as miserable as that though! There's plenty of room for expansion and characterisation here though, some of the characters could become interesting...before you kill them off. Nastily.
I reckon you could write about something like Stalingrad or similar, I think that would suit your style very well. I suppose this has all the right aspects too though, trenches and a hopeless situation. Introducing the characters all at once in a long list is an unusual way of doing it, but hey, this is a short story.

I'm a bit stuck writing at the moment...I'm toying with a vampire story, in a future where they're bred genetically and used as corporate hitmen and saboteurs, but frankly it's a bit cheesy and lacks background. Might stick some of it up here though.