Advice for all those taking GCSEs or any other exmas this month

[Ianofsmeg16]

Here to you my friends are 50 pieces of advice I give for taking exams




Or if your just bored;

50 things to do in an exam!

50 Fun things to do in an exam that does not matter (i.e. you are
going to fail the class completely no matter what you get on the
final exam)

1. Bring a pillow. Fall asleep (or pretend to) until the last 15
minutes. Wake up, say, "oh geez, better get cracking," and do
some gibberish work. Turn it in a few minutes early.

2. Get a copy of the exam, run out screaming "Andre, Andre, I've
got the secret documents!!"

3. If it is a math/science exam, answer in essay form. If it is
long answer/essay form, answer with numbers and symbols. Be
creative. Use the integral symbol.

4. Make paper airplanes out of the exam. Aim them at the
instructor's left nostril.

5. Talk the entire way through the exam. Read questions aloud,
debate your answers with yourself out loud. If asked to stop,
yell out, "I'm SOOO sure you can hear me thinking." Then start
talking about what a jerk the instructor is.

6. Bring cheerleaders.

7. Walk in, get the exam, sit down. About five minutes into it,
loudly say to the instructor, "I don't understand ANY of this.
I've been to every lecture all semester long! What's the deal?
And who the hell are you? Where's the regular guy?"

8. Bring a Game Boy (or Game Gear, etc...). Play with the volume
at max level.

9. On the answer sheet (book, whatever) find a new, interesting
way to refuse to answer every question. For example: I refuse to
answer this question on the grounds that it conflicts with my
religious beliefs. Be creative.

10. Bring pets.

11. Run into the exam room looking about frantically. Breathe a
sigh of relief. Go to the instructor, say, "They've found me, I
have to leave the country," and run off.

12. Fifteen minutes into the exam, stand up, rip up all the
papers into very small pieces, throw them into the air and yell
out "Merry Christmas." If you're really daring, ask for another
copy of the exam. Say you lost the first one. Repeat this process
every fifteen minutes.

13. Do the exam with crayons, paint, or fluorescent markers.

14. Come into the exam wearing slippers, a bathrobe, a towel on
your head, and nothing else.

15. Come down with a BAD case of Turet's Syndrome during the
exam. Be as vulgar as possible.

16. Do the entire exam in another language. If you don't know
one, make one up! For math/science exams, try using Roman
numerals.

17. Bring things to throw at the instructor when s/he's not
looking. Blame it on the person nearest to you.

18. As soon as the instructor hands you the exam, eat it.

19. Walk into the exam with an entourage. Claim you are going to
be taping your next video during the exam. Try to get the
instructor to let them stay, be persuasive. Tell the instructor
to expect a percentage of the profits if they are allowed to
stay.

20. Every five minutes, stand up, collect all your things, move
to another seat, continue with the exam.

21. Turn in the exam approximately 30 minutes into it. As you
walk out, start commenting on how easy it was.

22. Do the entire exam as if it was multiple choice and
true/false. If it is a multiple choice exam, spell out
interesting things (DCCAB.BABE. etc..).

23. Bring a black marker. Return the exam with all questions and
answers completely blacked out.

24. Get the exam. Twenty minutes into it, throw your papers down
violently, scream out, "screw this!" and walk out triumphantly.

25. Arrange a protest before the exam starts (i.e. Threaten the
instructor that whether or not everyone's done, they are all
leaving after one hour to go drink)

26. Show up completely drunk. (Completely drunk means at some
point during the exam, you should start crying for mommy)

27. Every now and then, clap twice rapidly. If the instructor
asks why, tell him/her in a very derogatory tone, "the light bulb
that goes on above my head when I get an idea is hooked up to a
clapper. DUH!"

28. Comment on how sexy the instructor is looking that day.

29. Come to the exam wearing a black cloak. After about 30
minutes, put on a white mask and start yelling, "I'm here, the
phantom of the opera," until they drag you away.

30. Go to an exam for a class you have no clue about, where you
know the class is very small, and the instructor would recognize
you if you belonged. Claim that you have been to every lecture.
Fight for your right to take the exam.

31. Upon receiving the exam, look it over. While laughing loudly,
say, "you don't really expect me to waste my time on this drivel?
Days of our Lives is on!!!"

32. Bring a water pistol with you. Nuff said.

33. From the moment the exam begins, hum the theme to Jeopardy.
Ignore the instructor's requests for you to stop. When they
finally get you to leave one way or another, begin whistling the
theme to the Bridge on the River Kwai.

34. Start a brawl in the middle of the exam.

35. If the exam is math/science related, make up the longest
proofs you could possibly think of. Get pi and imaginary numbers
into most equations. If it is a written exam, relate everything
to your own life story.

36. Come in wearing a full knight's outfit, complete with sword
and shield.

37. Bring a friend to give you a back massage the entire way
through the exam. Insist this person is needed, because you have
bad circulation.

38. Bring cheat sheets FOR ANOTHER CLASS (make sure this is
obvious... like history notes for a calculus exam... otherwise
you're not just failing, you're getting kicked out too) and
staple them to the exam, with the comment "Please use the
attached notes for references as you see fit."

39. When you walk in, complain about the heat. Strip.

40. After you get the exam, call the instructor over, point to
any question, ask for the answer. Try to work it out of him/her.

41. One word: Wrestlemania.

42. Bring balloons, blow them up, start throwing them around like
they do before concerts start.

43. Try to get people in the room to do the wave.

44. Play frisbee with a friend at the other side of the room.

45. Bring some large, cumbersome, ugly idol. Put it right next to
you. Pray to it often. Consider a small sacrifice.

46. Get deliveries of candy, flowers, balloons, telegrams, etc...
sent to you every few minutes throughout the exam.

47. During the exam, take apart everything around you. Desks,
chairs, anything you can reach.

48. Complete the exam with everything you write being backwards
at a 90 degree angle.

49. Bring a musical instrument with you, play various tunes. If
you are asked to stop, say, "it helps me think." Bring a copy of
the Student Handbook with you, challenging the instructor to find
the section on musical instruments during finals. Don't forget to
use the phrase, "Told you so."

50. Answer the exam with the "Top Ten Reasons Why Professor xxxx
Sucks."

[Avicenna]

Too late sir, I've done my AS level today!

38. Bring cheat sheets FOR ANOTHER CLASS (make sure this is
obvious... like history notes for a calculus exam... otherwise
you're not just failing, you're getting kicked out too) and
staple them to the exam, with the comment "Please use the
attached notes for references as you see fit."

[ZombieFriedNuts]

Did you take that from somewhere else, I remember seeing it somewhere

[ZombieFriedNuts]

http://www.laughnet.net/product_info...roducts_id=116
good website that

On second thoughts just search for “50 things to do in an exam!” it doesn’t matter, there's hundreds of them

[Bar Kochba]

wow cant wait to do it......... damn why are all my exams important!!!

[ZombieFriedNuts]

That’s the nature of exams there evil

[ZombieFriedNuts]

24 Things to do Instead of Studying for Finals

24 Have a root canal
23 Eat dirt
22 Go to all of your classes
21 Clean out your bellybutton
20 Make crank calls
19 Gamble borrowed money
18 Sharpen your pencils (all of them)
17 Talk to yourself
16 call 976-anything
15 Try on all your clothes at one time
14 Try on all your clothes one at a time
13 Memorize the phone book
12 Play your records backwards
11 Glue money to the floor and watch people try to pick it up
10 Go to the airport and meet people
9 Bite the heads off Gummi Bears and take them back to the supermarket
8 Start new rumors
7 Hold your breath till you pass out
6 Rub your eyes till you see stars
5 Fry ants with a magnfying glass
4 Set every clock in a building foreward
3 Walk up to a salesperson and ask "May I help you?"
2 Go Christmas Caroling by yourself
1 Post 24 things to do instead of studying which your sister wrote for a local paper

[Avicenna]

crank calls?

[BDC]

A light fell out of the ceiling on to one of the girls in my general studies exam. Fun times.

No idea why I agreed to do general studies. Not only is it totally worthless, it's a waste of time.

[Big King Sanctaphrax]

One of my teachers tried to sign me up for General Studies. I laughed in her face and ran out of the room.

[Silver Rusher]

ROFLMAO.













































'nuff said

[Ianofsmeg16]

2. Get a copy of the exam, run out screaming "Andre, Andre, I've
got the secret documents!!"

I have a soft spot for this one I admit, I'm not sure why, but I find it really funny

[Dutch_guy]

13. Do the exam with crayons, paint, or fluorescent markers.

That one I'm going to do one way or another, or I'll force someone to do it instead...

The latter option sounds best come to think of it...

[_Martyr_]

Whats General Studies?

[Craterus]

A waste of time sort of exam. My brother did it too. His group of friends set a challenge among themselves to include certain words and phrases into their exam answers. That's always a fun one.

[John86]

My friend taped a dollar to his exam with "Higher grade?" written next to it.

Genius.

[Scurvy]

My friend taped a dollar to his exam with "Higher grade?" written next to it.

Genius.

i'l be trying that n monday

" 43. Try to get people in the room to do the wave." - i like that one :D

[BDC]

One of my teachers tried to sign me up for General Studies. I laughed in her face and ran out of the room.

I did it on condition I didn't have to go to any lessons.

[ZombieFriedNuts]

O I love this website

Bored In Class?




Warning: Do not do all of them in one class.

1. Try to develop psychic powers, then use 'em.
2. Inflate a beachball and throw it around the room.
3. Sing showtunes.
4. Fake a seizure.
5. Make loud animal noises then deny doing it.
6. Think of new pick lines. See if they work.
7. Pretend you're flying a jet fighter in the Gulf War.
8. Churn some butter.
9. Conceive a brand new language.
10. Walls made of brick. Count 'em.
11. Plot revenge against someone.
12. Think of nicknames for everyone you know.
13. Punch the person next to you in the mouth.
14. See how long you can hold your breath.
15. Take your pants off and give them to the prof.
16. Chew on your arm until someone notices.
17. Change seats every three minutes.
18. Piss all over the room while yelling "House on fire!".
19. Think of ways to cheat at Trivial Pursuit.
20. Shave.
21. Run across the room, tag someone and say "You're it.".
22. Announce to the class that you are God and that you're angry.
23. Think of five new ways to use your shoes.
24. Experiment with you're sexuality.
25. Start a wave.
26. Walk around the room begging for spare change.
27. Roast marshmellows.
28. Practice phrasing your answers in the form of a question.
29. Crawl around the room humming the music from Mission Impossible.
30. Take apart your desk.
31. Tear pages out of your notebook.
32. Pretend to communicate with your home planet.
33. Play rock-paper-scissors with yourself.Accuse your left hand of
cheating.
34. Do a quick tapdance routine.
35. Play with matches.
36. Try birdwatching.
37. Scratch yourself alot.
38. Pray to the devil, out loud.
39. Walk up the aisle yelling, "Popcorn! Hot popcorn here!".
40. Throw your backpack at someone.
41. Draw on your stomach.
42. Run to the window, then say, "Sorry, I thought I saw the Bat-signal".
43. Ask the person in front of you to marry you.
44. Start laughing really hard and say, "Oh, now I get it.".
45. Make a sundial.
46. Sell stolen goods.
47. Bite people.
48. Summarize the teachings of Socrates in 50 words or less.
49. Give yourself a new identity.
50. Write a screenplay about a diabetic Sweedish girl who can't swim.
51. Dig an escape tunnel.
52. Learn voodoo.
53. Lick yourself clean.
54. Lick someone else clean.
55. Announce your candidacy for President.
56. Learn to tie your shoes with one hand.
57. See how many push-ups you can do.
58. Try to steal your prof's wallet.
59. Run with scissors.
60. Write stupid lists.

[mercian billman]

I've never done anything quite like that but I did happen to master the comepletely spaced out I have no idea what's going on look. You know like that one episode of the Simpsons where Bart starts to imagine Pokemon, during class.

I find it's a great way to annoy your teachers, while at the same time still doing the test and hopefully passing. It works best when you've stayed up all night and take energy/diet pills roughly 30 minutes before class starts. You will have the most spaced out/paranoid look imaginable and you will be bouncing off the walls and you'll probably trip walking down the stairs as well.

It should be noted that I do not advocate the use of pills to stay awake, if your really that tired, then just go to sleep and skip school.

[Crazed Rabbit]

Here's one:
Have your friend call your cell phone while you take your exam. Answer it, then after second or so say:
"Blashnarg, ZyQuan!! I can't speak with you now! I'm taking a aourking exam on the human planet! I have to blend in!"
real loud. With a snort of annoyance and disgust, put the phone back and continue for a second with the exam. Then look up, yell "Blashnarg!" and run out.

Crazed Rabbit

[Masy]

for some reason absurd situations really get me, couldn't stop laughing at

29. Come to the exam wearing a black cloak. After about 30
minutes, put on a white mask and start yelling, "I'm here, the
phantom of the opera," until they drag you away.

Perhaps someone could explain this in terms of the human psyche? Why do i find ridiculous situations so amusing?

[Duke Malcolm]

36. Come in wearing a full knight's outfit, complete with sword and shield.

I did that, but the invigilators told me to go home and get changed into uniform...

This is too late for me... I had my last exam today... I shall have to remember all this next year...

1. Try to develop psychic powers, then use 'em.
2. Inflate a beachball and throw it around the room.
3. Sing showtunes.
4. Fake a seizure.
5. Make loud animal noises then deny doing it.
6. Think of new pick lines. See if they work.
7. Pretend you're flying a jet fighter in the Gulf War.
8. Churn some butter.
9. Conceive a brand new language.
10. Walls made of brick. Count 'em.
11. Plot revenge against someone.
12. Think of nicknames for everyone you know.
13. Punch the person next to you in the mouth.
14. See how long you can hold your breath.
15. Take your pants off and give them to the prof.
16. Chew on your arm until someone notices.
17. Change seats every three minutes.
18. Piss all over the room while yelling "House on fire!".
19. Think of ways to cheat at Trivial Pursuit.
20. Shave.
21. Run across the room, tag someone and say "You're it.".
22. Announce to the class that you are God and that you're angry.
23. Think of five new ways to use your shoes.
24. Experiment with you're sexuality.
25. Start a wave.
26. Walk around the room begging for spare change.
27. Roast marshmellows.
28. Practice phrasing your answers in the form of a question.
29. Crawl around the room humming the music from Mission Impossible.
30. Take apart your desk.
31. Tear pages out of your notebook.
32. Pretend to communicate with your home planet.
33. Play rock-paper-scissors with yourself.Accuse your left hand of
cheating.
34. Do a quick tapdance routine.
35. Play with matches.
36. Try birdwatching.
37. Scratch yourself alot.
38. Pray to the devil, out loud.
39. Walk up the aisle yelling, "Popcorn! Hot popcorn here!".
40. Throw your backpack at someone.
41. Draw on your stomach.
42. Run to the window, then say, "Sorry, I thought I saw the Bat-signal".
43. Ask the person in front of you to marry you.
44. Start laughing really hard and say, "Oh, now I get it.".
45. Make a sundial.
46. Sell stolen goods.
47. Bite people.
48. Summarize the teachings of Socrates in 50 words or less.
49. Give yourself a new identity.
50. Write a screenplay about a diabetic Sweedish girl who can't swim.
51. Dig an escape tunnel.
52. Learn voodoo.
53. Lick yourself clean.
54. Lick someone else clean.
55. Announce your candidacy for President.
56. Learn to tie your shoes with one hand.
57. See how many push-ups you can do.
58. Try to steal your prof's wallet.
59. Run with scissors.
60. Write stupid lists.

My comrades and I have already done:-1,2,3,5,7,9,10,11,12,13,16,17,20,21,22,23,25,27,28,30,31,35,36,40,43,44,46,47,49,52,59,60...
We have much spare time... We got almost the entire class pretending to be jet fighters (No. 7) in Computing, once...
We also had a 7 course lunch in Mathematics once... I provided the cheese course and certain parts of the cutlery...

[edyzmedieval]

Oh man, I laughed at this thread so much, I think I even worked my abdomen. No need for pushups any more.