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  1. #1
    Nobody expects the Senior Member Lemur's Avatar
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    Lightbulb The Internet Explained

    You've probably already heard about this one, but it's too good not to post. Senator Ted Stevens took some time to explain the internet to you. The least you could do is read what he has to say. Or even listen, if you're prefer a sound file. Brilliant stuff. Can't make jokes about it because it's comedy genius all by itself.

    Someone's selling commemorative t-shirts. Good for them.

    [edit]

    Looks as though the Daily Show has pounced on this one ...

    [edit of the edit]

    And someone has made a very funny musical remix ...

    Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 
    Senator Ted Stevens

    There's one company now you can sign up and you can get a movie delivered to your house daily by delivery service. Okay. And currently it comes to your house, it gets put in the mail box when you get home and you change your order but you pay for that, right.

    But this service is now going to go through the internet and what you do is you just go to a place on the internet and you order your movie and guess what you can order ten of them delivered to you and the delivery charge is free.

    Ten of them streaming across that internet and what happens to your own personal internet?

    I just the other day got, an internet was sent by my staff at 10 o'clock in the morning on Friday and I just got it yesterday. Why?

    Because it got tangled up with all these things going on the internet commercially.

    So you want to talk about the consumer? Let's talk about you and me. We use this internet to communicate and we aren't using it for commercial purposes.

    We aren't earning anything by going on that internet. Now I'm not saying you have to or you want to discrimnate against those people.

    The regulatory approach is wrong. Your approach is regulatory in the sense that it says "No one can charge anyone for massively invading this world of the internet". No, I'm not finished. I want people to understand my position, I'm not going to take a lot of time.

    They want to deliver vast amounts of information over the internet. And again, the internet is not something you just dump something on. It's not a truck.

    It's a series of tubes.

    And if you don't understand those tubes can be filled and if they are filled, when you put your message in, it gets in line and its going to be delayed by anyone that puts into that tube enormous amounts of material, enormous amounts of material.

    Now we have a separate Department of Defense internet now, did you know that?

    Do you know why?

    Because they have to have theirs delivered immediately. They can't afford getting delayed by other people.


    Now I think these people are arguing whether they should be able to dump all that stuff on the internet ought to consider if they should develop a system themselves.

    Maybe there is a place for a commercial net but it's not using what consumers use every day.

    It's not using the messaging service that is essential to small businesses, to our operation of families.

    The whole concept is that we should not go into this until someone shows that there is something that has been done that really is a viloation of net neutraility that hits you and me.
    Last edited by Lemur; 07-15-2006 at 07:27.

  2. #2
    L'Etranger Senior Member Banquo's Ghost's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Internet Explained

    Dear God. This man legislates?

    My favourite:

    Quote Originally Posted by Weird person
    I just the other day got, an internet was sent by my staff at 10 o'clock in the morning on Friday and I just got it yesterday. Why?
    I want an internet too...

    "If there is a sin against life, it consists not so much in despairing as in hoping for another life and in eluding the implacable grandeur of this one."
    Albert Camus "Noces"

  3. #3
    Lesbian Rebel Member Mikeus Caesar's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Internet Explained

    I've known about this for a while, it's pretty funny - the guy who is meant to be legislating the internet has become a laughing stock, not only on 'the internets' but also in real life.

    Silly old coot, they should replace him with someone who knows what they're talking about.

    YTMND's on the subject:

    http://tubes.ytmnd.com/

    My personal favourite: http://tubested.ytmnd.com/
    Quote Originally Posted by Ranika
    I'm being assailed by a mental midget of ironically epic proportions. Quick as frozen molasses, this one. Sharp as a melted marble. It's disturbing. I've had conversations with a braying mule with more coherence.


  4. #4

    Default Re: The Internet Explained

    Damn, and I wanted to post this a couple of days ago, but I was too lazy, again. Good job, Lemur, and as for the content - oh well, one just can't make up stuff like this
    Therapy helps, but screaming obscenities is cheaper.

  5. #5
    Member Member whyidie's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Internet Explained

    Holy smokes. Too bad he didn't use "folks" to make himself seem even more down to earth.

    Based on that speech, I don't even know what his position is. Is he for or against net neutraility ? Maybe that was his intention.

  6. #6

    Default Re: The Internet Explained

    Quote Originally Posted by whyidie
    Holy smokes. Too bad he didn't use "folks" to make himself seem even more down to earth.

    Based on that speech, I don't even know what his position is. Is he for or against net neutraility ? Maybe that was his intention.
    He can't have a position!
    Sadly, he is among those who decide this - really really sad, actually - clueless people in charge of things they have no idea about - how the heck does this happen so often ??
    Isn't the spirit of capitalism to have the most efficient people in the job ?
    (I'm not talking about the US here, but in general, because I've seen/heard other cases where, again, clueless people are in charge of things...)
    Therapy helps, but screaming obscenities is cheaper.

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