There is something rotten in Finland

[Fragony]

Just read this somewhere else, and since we have a lot of vikings here it might be good fun to put it here as well.

Anhyway, #1 cause of death over there up north: booze. Now that is pretty shocking, I know the scandinavians love to be absolutily pissed enjoy a drink, but this is a bit overkill. How come you guys drink so much

(and how do your homeless actually manage to get that drunk with these prices)

[Gregoshi]

1) In a country name Finland, you'd figure they'd drink like fishes.

2) It would be a shame to let all that ice go to waste.

3) In winter those all night parties last much longer than elsewhere.

[Watchman]

That #1 cause of death figure just has to include derived rates like drunk driving and the classic party entertainment, drunken knife fight at 4 AM... And the summer standby, Mad Serpent Disease which is caused by an open zipper in a boat.

The most widely consumed alcoholic around here is beer, though.

[Fragony]

That #1 cause of death figure just has to include derived rates like drunk driving and the classic party entertainment, drunken knife fight at 4 AM... And the summer standby, Mad Serpent Disease which is caused by an open zipper in a boat.

Gotcha, it was too outragious te begin with.

[Watchman]

Saw it in a 'paper here today, though. The accompanying text sort of explained things. The gist is that various medical conditions related to alcohol - I don't quite know the English terminology, but apparently mainly dealing with blood vessels - are the single most common cause of death among Finnish males, usually becoming acute between late forties to mid-sixties in age.

I can believe that one. A major beer belly is rather common among Finnish men, especially by middle age, and obviously not exactly conductive to good overall health. The rather drunkennes-oriented Finnish drinking habits ("East European", we often sarcastically observe), primary through beer (lots of "empty" energy and calories) and "hard" distilled liquors (generally unhealthy in large dosages) plus generally little physical exercise and/or healthy eating, no doubt also contribute.

That the gov't taxes the snot out of booze is really only sensible, since it more or less has to foot the eventual medical bills anyway.


But speaking of unhealthy drinking, I've heard a story of a Migrations Period Germanic warlord who got so drunk during a feast he managed to drown in a large vat of mead. Another one then managed to pull off the same stunt - during the first guy's funeral feast...
Beats me if it's true, but it's a good story.

[Kagemusha]

Nope Fragony. Its well known fact that things are preserved in Alcohol. So nothing rotten here.
Like Watchman sayed its not the drink which kills us, but drinking. All those wonderfull short and long time effects.Overdose,fights,suicides,accidents and in the long term diseases caused by alcohol.Also heart and vascular related diseases are common here and when you get into middle age a bottle of Vodka can kill you. If nothing else then the hangover will Finish you off.
Another question is why Finns drink so heavily. I think there are many reasons, first ofcourse we are Nothern Barbarians and we are supposed to drink heavily. Second the Nature conditions here are pretty extreme and im pretty sure that it effects the psyche of inhabitants heavily. We have short Northern summer which lasts for about 3 months.During that time the sun shines almost 24 hours in a day and people feel like partying.Then there is the winter 5 months and in the middle winter the Sun hardly rises. So it gets pretty dull so people want to cheer up and they head to the bar. Then there are couple months of Autumn and Spring which are secondary.
But if we look the bright side of things something is pretty well in our healthcare when we die on diseases that come from high living standards and bad habbits.

[GoreBag]

I thought it was well-established that alcoholism is more prevalent the further north you go...Sweden, Norway, Russia, Finland, Canada...we all drink a little more than we 'should'.

Speaking of drunken, Finnish antics, though, has anyone here seen the Dudesons movie? I heard Jarppi lost a thumb to a bear while wrestling it.

[Kagemusha]

Ah the Extreme Duudsonit. Couple nutty Botnians, pretty much the jackass of Finland. I know that Jarppi doesnt have a thumb, but not so sure if it was a bear that took it.

[Devastatin Dave]

Would a "Congrats" be in bad form? Seems like a pretty decent way to croak.

[Watchman]

In a way it's a rather good sign if the most common cause of death among adult males - a group for assorted reasons particularly prone to doing stupid and dangerous things - is "lifestyle diseases".

I understand the French and Germans actually consume comparable if not greater amounts of alcohol per capita to what we do, though. AFAIK the difference is in the method - ours tends to be, as mentioned earlier, rather inebriation-oriented which in practice means short bouts of heavy drinking (or extended binges for the real problem cases), while they spread it more evenly (it is my impression an amount of wine is regarded as almost de rigueur "dinner drink" in France for example).

[GoreBag]

That is true, but Germany's reputation as The Beer Country is failing. They're no longer the largest consumer of beer in the world (3rd place, last time I checked), and already, more Germans drink coffee than beer.

[lars573]

I thought it was well-established that alcoholism is more prevalent the further north you go...Sweden, Norway, Russia, Finland, Canada...we all drink a little more than we 'should'.

Speaking of drunken, Finnish antics, though, has anyone here seen the Dudesons movie? I heard Jarppi lost a thumb to a bear while wrestling it.

They now have a TV show on Spike. And yeah Yarpi claims he lost his thumb to a polar bear. But to be fair they aren't drunk. Just morons. I watched two episodes. In which they burned their house out and Yarpi almost killed the other guy with a large fur tree. Morons not drunks.

[Watchman]

Dare To Be Stupid, as it were. It's not like young adult males have to muddle their wits with chemical assistance in order to be idiots.

[GoreBag]

They now have a TV show on Spike. And yeah Yarpi claims he lost his thumb to a polar bear. But to be fair they aren't drunk. Just morons. I watched two episodes. In which they burned their house out and Yarpi almost killed the other guy with a large fur tree. Morons not drunks.

I've seen the show, and there's nothing you can say that will convince me that those guys do not drink copious quanitities of beer.

[Watchman]

I would be extremely surprised if they didn't. Finns way smarter and less self-destructive than they do, after all.

[GoreBag]

I would be extremely surprised if they didn't. Finns way smarter and less self-destructive than they do, after all.

The Suomi sound like kindred spirits.

[lars573]

I've seen the show, and there's nothing you can say that will convince me that those guys do not drink copious quanitities of beer.

I have no evidence either way as to whether they drink or not. But are they drunk for every second on that show, no. In fact they act like pefectly sober gomers on screen.

[GoreBag]

I have no evidence either way as to whether they drink or not. But are they drunk for every second on that show, no. In fact they act like pefectly sober gomers on screen.

Clearly you've never met a Finn.

[lars573]

You forget I'm from the Maritimes I know a drunk-who-don't-look-it-when I see one. Dudesons don't fall into that category.

[Spetulhu]

It's clearly time to post a link again. A guide to Finland for beginners:
http://www.ilmatar.net/~np/misc/fore...o_finland.html

The author hasn't cleaned up every out-of-date statement, but that's not too important. Just remember that we use Euros instead of Finnish Marks these days and you'll be fine. Most sorts of credit cards work too.

[Kagemusha]

LOL!

[Watchman]

My nipples are exploding with delight !

[Watchman]

"However, they don't eat humans! In fact, there is no record of a polar bear ever attacking a living human in Finland, so there's nothing to worry."

Now that's a pretty clever one.

[lars573]

Polar bears are perfectly harmless....Provided you have mounties armed with shotguns to scare them away.

[Fragony]

"However, they don't eat humans! In fact, there is no record of a polar bear ever attacking a living human in Finland, so there's nothing to worry."

Now that's a pretty clever one.

You actually have wild polar bears there?

[Watchman]

Nope, although it's a popular joke. Which is kind of the point of the joke above methinks.

We do have the type of brown-ish bear you find all across the world on the northern coniferous belt, though. But those are honourable fighters; they only ever seem to attack armed hunters.

[Fragony]

Nope, although it's a popular joke. Which is kind of the point of the joke above methinks.

We do have the type of brown-ish bear you find all across the world on the northern coniferous belt, though. But those are honourable fighters; they only ever seem to attack armed hunters.

Yaya I got the joke

That is bloody awesome that you still have wild bears over there, here we only get to run from wasps. We should build some nature here as well.

[lars573]

Nations that have a low people/km^2 ratio and high urbanization tend to have a lot more large animal species. Predatory ones especially. For example I wouldn't be surprised if our favorite tree killing mod has to keep his waste containers behind iron bars to keep bears out of them. In Churchill Manitoba they have a bear patrol. Due to the fact that actual polar bears (which are about the size of a large european car and 10x as dangerous) migrate through the town every spring. There is also bear patrols in Whistler BC, smaller black bears raid the resort towns hotel dumpsters. And houses if stupid residents feed them. Bears are smart and black bears can crawl through the average north american windows (screens don't stop them) and open you fridge an cupboards. Then they eat everything.

[KukriKhan]

What a marvelous Guide - and I got to be visitor #13,000. Yay!

You Finns really know how to party!

[GoreBag]

You forget I'm from the Maritimes I know a drunk-who-don't-look-it-when I see one. Dudesons don't fall into that category.

You forget that I'm from the Maritimes and that a Finn isn't a Mainlander.