They can also be adopted, especially if you fight a lot with them. The French start with three 'free' generals also and I managed to adopt two of them without trying very hard or marrying my princess to them.
Regarding the mods I'm all for them, but I haven't really tested any of them for myself. Maybe another one can share some experiences on that field.
Personally I would go for a 1 year per turn time scale similar to M:TW mixed with a mod that makes characters also age 1 year per turn. Don't know what other people think about it but the separate timescales in vanilla M2:TW really mess up role-playing for me.
I've seen a mini-mod that adjusts the game for a 1year per turn timescale adjusting population growth and build times, but as before I haven't tested it myself yet.
Cheers!
Ituralde
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