Silly Warning Labels

[Lemur]

This is probably old news to some, but I just stumbled across MLaw's Stupid Warning Labels contest. Very good stuff. Here are some the winners:

• The label on an electric hand blender promoted for use in "blending, whipping, chopping and dicing," warns: "Never remove food or other items from the blades while the product is operating."
• A digital thermometer that can be used to take a person's temperature several different ways warns: "Once used rectally, the thermometer should not be used orally."
• A household iron warns users: “Never iron clothes while they are being worn”
• A label on a hair dryer reads, “Never use hair dryer while sleeping”
• A warning on an electric drill made for carpenters cautions: “This product not intended for use as a dental drill.”
• The label on a bottle of drain cleaner warns: “If you do not understand, or cannot read, all directions, cautions and warnings, do not use this product.”
• A smoke detector warns: “Do not use the Silence Feature in emergency situations. It will not extinguish a fire.”
• A massage chair warns: “DO NOT use massage chair without clothing... and, Never force any body part into the backrest area while the rollers are moving.”
• A cardboard car sunshield that keeps sun off the dashboard warns, “Do not drive with sunshield in place”
• An “Aim-n-Flame” fireplace lighter cautions, “Do not use near fire, flame or sparks”
• A label on a hand-held massager advises consumers not to use “while sleeping or unconscious”
• A 12-inch rack for storing compact disks warns: “Do not use as a ladder.”
• A cartridge for a laser printer warns, “Do not eat toner”
• A 13-inch wheel on a wheelbarrow warns: “Not intended for highway use”
• A can of self-defense pepper spray warns users: “May irritate eyes”
• A warning on a pair of shin guards manufactured for bicyclists says: “Shin pads cannot protect any part of the body they do not cover.”
• A snowblower warns: “Do not use snowthrower on roof.”
• A dishwasher carries this warning: “Do not allow children to play in the dishwasher.”
• A popular manufactured fireplace log warns: “Caution - Risk of Fire”
• A box of birthday cake candles says: “DO NOT use soft wax as ear plugs or for any other function that involves insertion into a body cavity.”

[sapi]

Seen some of them before but they're still fantastic

[Hepcat]

Those are brilliant.

[sapi]

While not strictly a warning label, i'd like to add that all those cds which ask you to read the cd-key off the disc (which is in the drive) are really, really stupid :P

[TB666]

I actually wonder if people actually did this before the labels came up ??
Also my favorite is on a chainsaw where it is says "Warning, don't try to stop the chain with your penis"

[Hosakawa Tito]

These labels are legal CYA, cover your arse, because some intellectually challenged individuals have won large monetary lawsuits in the past because there wasn't a warning label. Ever look at the label for a box of rat poison, yes, not for human consumption, oh really? Whodda thunk it?

Ever wonder why they have to post "NO SWIMMING" signs on the river just above Niagara Falls?

I say we let Darwinism take it's course.

[Beren Son Of Barahi]

maybe this is a reflection of the general public more then anything else, you won't put a sign on something like "don't eat this you fat moron" if some fat moron didnt try to eat whatever it was. Weather through being a fat moron or through mistake, then suing the company for not telling them not to eat it... this seems to be alot more rampant in the us where it seems easier to sue for almost anything. although i was only there for a month or so...


common sense, so rare it should be mined.

common sense, if only i could find out where you buy that from.....

[Marshal Murat]

Found this on M2TW:Do not expect all options to work, including but not limited to Singleplayer, Multiplayer, Options, and/or Install

[TB666]

These labels are legal CYA, cover your arse, because some intellectually challenged individuals have won large monetary lawsuits in the past because there wasn't a warning label. Ever look at the label for a box of rat poison, yes, not for human consumption, oh really? Whodda thunk it?

The legal system is screwed up then.
These kinda cases should just be laughed at and dismissed.
Do they really think that people that are stupid enough to actually think of for example put their hand in a blender while it is running is smart enough to read the box first ??

[Peasant Phill]

The legal system is screwed up then.
These kinda cases should just be laughed at and dismissed.
Do they really think that people that are stupid enough to actually think of for example put their hand in a blender while it is running is smart enough to read the box first ??

It's not a case of preventing such freak accidents but rather making sure no one can sue the manufacturers the 'tools-of-mayhem'. If it wasn't possible in (for the most part anglo-saxon countries) to sue for the most ridiculous reasons and amounts and still win, this phenomenon wouldn't exist.

To award damages, the legal system should determine who is to blame right. In such stupid cases as these, the consumer (a.k.a. mr/mrs. retard) would carry the blame for the most part if not entirely. So why should (s)he get damages in such a huge amount?

If only we would live in a logical society, damages would only be granted when accidents happen during normal use (or what would be considered widespread use) of an object. So labels would have an informational value rather than legal protection for the manufacturer.

[Vladimir]

If only we would live in a logical society, damages would only be granted when accidents happen during normal use (or what would be considered widespread use) of an object. So labels would have an informational value rather than legal protection for the manufacturer.

We don't live in a logical society but a litigious one. The word 'reason' is not what it once was during the Age of Reason.

[Xiahou]

These labels are legal CYA, cover your arse, because some intellectually challenged individuals have won large monetary lawsuits in the past because there wasn't a warning label. Ever look at the label for a box of rat poison, yes, not for human consumption, oh really? Whodda thunk it?

Ever wonder why they have to post "NO SWIMMING" signs on the river just above Niagara Falls?

I say we let Darwinism take it's course.

Just remember, behind every stupid label is a very rich tort lawyer.

[drone]

Just remember, behind every stupid label is a very rich tort lawyer.

Don't forget the idiot that hired him after the "accident"!

[Conqueror]

• A massage chair warns: “DO NOT use massage chair without clothing... and, Never force any body part into the backrest area while the rollers are moving.”

...did somebody actually try this, and why?

[Lemur]

...did somebody actually try this, and why?

Do you have to ask? The scenario is almost too easy to imagine: Strange man owns massage chair. Man decides to wedge his most vulnerable dangly bit into the rollers to get stimulation. Rollers crush aforesaid dangly bit. Man sues. Warning label goes on.

I'm sure it's something along those lines ...

[GoreBag]

...did somebody actually try this, and why?

It seemed like a good idea at the time.

[naut]

GAH! Hair-dryer whilst asleep!?

[English assassin]

To award damages, the legal system should determine who is to blame right. In such stupid cases as these, the consumer (a.k.a. mr/mrs. retard) would carry the blame for the most part if not entirely. So why should (s)he get damages in such a huge amount?

Interesting point. The general rule is you must take your victim as you find him, (AKA the "eggshell skull" rule), and for good reason. It WOULD be rather offensive if I punched you in the chops for a laugh*, and then escaped paying out more than a few hundred pounds because you shouldn't have had such a puny, easily breakable jaw.

Stupidity seems to me to be as much a valid characteristic of a victim as a glass jaw. We might rename the rule the "empty skull" rule in this case. (Although to the person who thinks that turning off a fire alram extinguishes a fire I might be tempted to paraphrase an old judgement and say "stupidty is a misfortune, not a privilege")

I don't know very much about US tort law but from what I do know your rules on duty and breach don't seem unreasonable, its the exemplary/punitive damages coupled with no win no fee litigation that causes the trouble.

Oh, wait, this was a funny thread. OK then, how about the packets of peanuts with "may contain nuts" on them?

*No actual violence is being offered. All liability for mental trauma is hereby excluded. Thank you

[Peasant Phill]

I'm aware of the "egg skull" rule as it is also in Belgian law (as probably in most countries). However, I don't believe it should apply to stupidity.
The rule refers to a state in which the victim is in and I don't regard stupidity as a state somebody could be in. One 'is stupid' because one does stupid things thus the action is stupid not the person. This is different from the glass jaw as the person will always have a glass jaw whatever action he takes, hence the emphasis on the state of the person.
And so we return to the normal or widespread use of objects vs. stupid use of objects.

[English assassin]

Ah, well, we shall have to agree to differ. Stupidity isn't a mere contingent. All my experience tells me that stupidity is a fundamental ingredient in nature, indeed, very possibly the unifying principle out of which all other matter and energy is created. There seems to be enough of it about.

Bow down and worship your new overlord:

[Peasant Phill]

Could you define stupidity please. I bet you can't do it without mentioning action.
One can be dumb/retarded/... just by being alive (IQ-level) => situation
One can't be stupid by just existing or you should be referring to his IQ-level.

[English assassin]

I already said, it is an omnipresent field underpinning all of nature. Very probably transmitted by the as yet undetected Higgs Bozo.

Like gravity, stupidity can only be observed indirectly though its effects. The force experienced when ordinary matter interacts with the stupidity field is what causes reality television, Mariah Carey, and going on ebay after six pints of beer.

[lancelot]

A kettle I bought a while ago (as Im sure with many other simple appliances) felt the need to include instructions-

Apprently- fill with water, plug it in and then turn on using the 'on' switch is too difficult for some people to work out on their own...

[Marshal Murat]

For Pop-tarts, the two pastries in the silvery wrapping? While not necessarily a warning label it is interesting if you disect it.
1.Remove pastry from pouch
2.Warm pastry in toasting appliance at lowest or lightest heat setting for one heating cycle only
3.Cool briefly before removing pastry from toasting appliance.

Okay, so if you have to read the instructions, why throw in 'heating cycle'?

[BDC]

Britain could have a "Warning! Expensive!" sticker on it...

[Rameusb5]

I actually wonder if people actually did this before the labels came up ??
Also my favorite is on a chainsaw where it is says "Warning, don't try to stop the chain with your penis"

I owned a chainsaw once and the manual had a billion or so warnings in the beginning. My favorite was:

"Never use this chainsaw if you are upset."

I can just see how that happened. Someone came home from work all ticked off and ran outside to use their chainsaw.

"Man, am I ticked off!"

*Vroooom!*
*whack whack whack*

"Ow! My face!"