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Thread: Maybe I'm just getting too old and senile to play Total War games

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  1. #1
    Senior Member Senior Member Forward Observer's Avatar
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    Default Maybe I'm just getting too old and senile to play Total War games

    I posted the thread the other day about how many times I have stupidly hit the end turn button when I was intending to hit the financial details button.

    Tonight I think I topped that in another senior moment. I am playing Spain and was on my way to take Algeria, Unfortunately there was a rebel army in the way that I was going to have to fight because they were blocking a narrow corridor between a river and the Med.

    I was just a bit out numbered, but I had a strong nicely balanced little army, so I go for the battle. Ive got 4 archer units, 3 dismounted knights, 2 feudal mounted knights, my general's body guard unit and two catapult units.

    By putting my archers in front, footknights next and cav knight to the rear, my army looked like a perfect symmetrical letter "H" laying on its side, and since my archer and mounted knight units extended the same distance past the each end of my footknights, I put my two catapult units in each of the pockets of the sideways "H"

    I group my boys and move them around for the best spot, since I pretty sure the enemy will attack immediately. Then I use the < > keys to get just the right facing. I do this forever because I am too damn picky, but finally I'm satisfied and hit the start battle button.

    I was right about the rebels--they appeared immediately in missile range and were heading straight for me on the run. As they rushed towards me, I wondered why my archers were not letting loose a flight of missiles, and then to my horror suddenly realized that unless my knights could order their horses to shoot arrows out of their butts not a shot was ever going to be fired.

    I had faced my army 180% in the wrong direction.

    Since there was no way to recover or make it right, and it was going to be a real disaster, I exited out and took the loss.

    Fortunately the computer only gigged me about 80 men, so it wasn't too bad, but boy did I feel foolish.

    Maybe I should just give up PC gaming and get back into woodworking again--Naaah!-- I probably just cut a couple of fingers off and not the virtual kind either--
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  2. #2
    the G-Diffuser Senior Member pevergreen's Avatar
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    Default Re: Maybe I'm just getting too old and senile to play Total War games

    It happens to the best of us. I spend so much time making a great formation, only to find the entire army is unreachable. (literally)

    *sigh*
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  3. #3

    Default Re: Maybe I'm just getting too old and senile to play Total War games

    Yeah, I had the same "unreachable" problem by Bern. I was behind bern if you marched from Staufen, towards milan, and milan attacked my army. I thought that I had this great spot when I looked at the map... There appeared to be one narrow corridor that the enemy would have to march up that zig zagged, so I parked a ton of archers and crossbows on the ledges, took screenshots, told my girlfriend to come up stairs and watch the ensuing slaughter... and when the battle finally started there wasn't a enemy unit moving. The route was blocked by one little patch of rock... So I had to switch the battle to 3x and waited it out. :(
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    Member Member Kraggenmor's Avatar
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    Default Re: Maybe I'm just getting too old and senile to play Total War games

    Quote Originally Posted by PaulTa
    told my girlfriend to come up stairs and watch the ensuing slaughter... (
    Did she thank you for dragging her away from whatever she was doing?

    ;)

    And, theres just no better feeling that hitting the 'Withdraw' button instead of the 'Halt' button. Especially when its a combined group.
    Last edited by Kraggenmor; 01-16-2007 at 21:26.


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  5. #5
    Maximizer of Marginal Utility Member Snoil The Mighty's Avatar
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    Default Re: Maybe I'm just getting too old and senile to play Total War games

    Quote Originally Posted by Forward Observer
    I posted the thread the other day about how many times I have stupidly hit the end turn button when I was intending to hit the financial details button.

    Tonight I think I topped that in another senior moment. I am playing Spain and was on my way to take Algeria, Unfortunately there was a rebel army in the way that I was going to have to fight because they were blocking a narrow corridor between a river and the Med.

    I was just a bit out numbered, but I had a strong nicely balanced little army, so I go for the battle. Ive got 4 archer units, 3 dismounted knights, 2 feudal mounted knights, my general's body guard unit and two catapult units.

    By putting my archers in front, footknights next and cav knight to the rear, my army looked like a perfect symmetrical letter "H" laying on its side, and since my archer and mounted knight units extended the same distance past the each end of my footknights, I put my two catapult units in each of the pockets of the sideways "H"

    I group my boys and move them around for the best spot, since I pretty sure the enemy will attack immediately. Then I use the < > keys to get just the right facing. I do this forever because I am too damn picky, but finally I'm satisfied and hit the start battle button.

    I was right about the rebels--they appeared immediately in missile range and were heading straight for me on the run. As they rushed towards me, I wondered why my archers were not letting loose a flight of missiles, and then to my horror suddenly realized that unless my knights could order their horses to shoot arrows out of their butts not a shot was ever going to be fired.

    I had faced my army 180% in the wrong direction.

    Since there was no way to recover or make it right, and it was going to be a real disaster, I exited out and took the loss.

    Fortunately the computer only gigged me about 80 men, so it wasn't too bad, but boy did I feel foolish.

    Maybe I should just give up PC gaming and get back into woodworking again--Naaah!-- I probably just cut a couple of fingers off and not the virtual kind either--
    Well Forward Observer, it probably took longer but is certainly no worse a fubar than carefully estimating the English full stack with a spy near o, I don't know..... say my Danish slightly-over-half-stack but with king and favorite son general in it just as a for instance , coming to the conclusion that though outnumbered and outarmed, I can take those English troublemakers in a pitched battle, then promptly hitting autocalc, killing a popular and talented king and his best general and gutting some silver chevron units because you just weren't looking at which button did which.... LOL
    Last edited by Snoil The Mighty; 01-13-2007 at 05:23.

  6. #6

    Default Re: Maybe I'm just getting too old and senile to play Total War games

    Quote Originally Posted by Forward Observer
    Maybe I should just give up PC gaming and get back into woodworking again--Naaah!-- I probably just cut a couple of fingers off and not the virtual kind either--
    If you're making these mistakes in the game, I'd stay away from woodworking. Looking the consequences of either sending lines of code to their doom or chopping off fingers, I'd much rather the little ones and zeros remember me as a bad commander.

    I don't remember making such mistakes, but I'm only a young and spry 20 years old, so I would be worried if I did make those kinds of mistakes.

    I did almost charge some cavalry into pikemen on purpose before. Luckily the game was paused when I gave the order, so I had time to think better of it.
    "The usefulness of a glass is in its emptiness."
    - Bruce Lee

  7. #7

    Default Re: Maybe I'm just getting too old and senile to play Total War games

    Quote Originally Posted by Swordfish
    I did almost charge some cavalry into pikemen on purpose before. Luckily the game was paused when I gave the order, so I had time to think better of it.
    I've done this one a number of times. I come to a screeching halt and run away. At least until I can engage them with some of my infantry.

    One of my typical problems is cavalry entanglement, particularly with my general. Also, the AI usually goes out of there way to single him out. My typical general is a bit brash, often heroic, but sometimes gets himself killed in battle. They have a special notification just for me to that effect. Something like "look, your foolish general has gotten himself killed."

  8. #8
    Senior Member Senior Member econ21's Avatar
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    Default Re: Maybe I'm just getting too old and senile to play Total War games

    Quote Originally Posted by Forward Observer
    I had faced my army 180% in the wrong direction.
    I did exactly the same thing in MTW once. The real beauty of it was that it was in a blizzard, so I just could not see the AI at all. I waited minutes, straining through the blizzard for signs on the oncoming AI assault. It was only after repeated puzzling over the mini-map that I realised they were on my back.

    The funny thing is, I thought that was probably one of the most realistic battles I have fought. STW could through up some nice AI ambushes, but since then TW has tended to give you too much information and too much control.

  9. #9

    Default Re: Maybe I'm just getting too old and senile to play Total War games

    Your problem is no worse than hitting the autosave button instead of autoload....

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