News of the Weird

[InsaneApache]

Man that's gotta hurt.....

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

Christian Lehman, 31, was left with multiple injuries to his legs and feet and 200 metal plates and screws to hold his ribs and shoulder blades in place.

He underwent 17 emergency surgeries and received 80 pints of blood in transfusions after climbing into the bin outside the main bus station in the British army garrison town of Paderborn.

Mr Lehman had been drinking white grain spirit, vodka and beer with friends when he went to the bin to try to retrieve boxes to make his bed for the night.

"I kind of toppled in, it was comfortable and I just fell asleep," he recalled.

But before dawn the binmen came and he was thrown into two-ton jaws of the machine.

"I cried out in pain but no-one could hear me," he said. "Pretty soon I was helpless with pain, doubled over. I could hear the bones cracking like twigs... pop, pop, pop, one after another.

"I just wanted God to end it quick."

It was only when the binmen paused the machinery to throw in more garbage that they noticed blood dripping from the jaws of the crusher and took a look inside.

Lehman was squeezed into a shape no bigger than a cardboard box.

It took firemen and paramedics 45 minutes to free him from the machine so he could be taken by helicopter to a hospital.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worl...eelie-bin.html

[naut]

Wow. Ouch.

[Hooahguy]

how did he survive? wow thats amazing....

[Lemur]

At long last, I can ditch my wife and buy a fembot!



Sega, known for its game consoles and Sonic the Hedgehog, has gone down the rather unusual route of creating a battery powered miniature robot girlfriend for lonely adult males. Called EMA (which stands for Eternal Maiden Actualization) Sega hopes this mini-fembot, which it describes as petite, friendly and big-busted, will bring joy to those in need when it is released onto the market in September.

She may be just 15 inches tall, but she's ready to entertain: she can sing, dance, hand out business cards and "walk like a lady". What's more, if you are feeling amorous, just activate her 'love mode' and using her infrared sensors she will detect and kiss any human heads in her vicinity.

[||Lz3||]

Chinese toddler claims to be world's youngest smoker

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

BEIJING, June 23 (RIA Novosti) - A two and a half year old Chinese boy from the city of Tianjin could be the world's youngest smoker, China Radio International (CRI) reported on Tuesday.

The child, identified as Tong Liangliang, was encouraged to smoke by his father. Liangliang was born with a hernia, but was too young for an operation. The father gave his son a cigarette when he was 18 months to try and relieve his pain.

"The father wasn't aware how serious the toddler's habit had become until the child began to increase the number of cigarettes he smoked per day," CRI said.

Liangliang now smokes a pack of cigarettes a day and refuses to quit. Every time he sees someone smoking, he asks for a cigarette too and becomes agitated and angry if refused.

In 2005, a 37-year-old Chinese man submitted an application to the Guinness Book of records, claiming he had started smoking at the age of three and was the world's youngest smoker. His application was denied on the grounds that it promoted a harmful habit.

[CountArach]

At long last, I can ditch my wife and buy a fembot!



Sega, known for its game consoles and Sonic the Hedgehog, has gone down the rather unusual route of creating a battery powered miniature robot girlfriend for lonely adult males. Called EMA (which stands for Eternal Maiden Actualization) Sega hopes this mini-fembot, which it describes as petite, friendly and big-busted, will bring joy to those in need when it is released onto the market in September.

She may be just 15 inches tall, but she's ready to entertain: she can sing, dance, hand out business cards and "walk like a lady". What's more, if you are feeling amorous, just activate her 'love mode' and using her infrared sensors she will detect and kiss any human heads in her vicinity.

xckd as always on the ball:

[Makanyane]

An unforgettable story

[Lemur]

Why you should always wear a lifejacket when mowing the lawn

OMAHA, Neb. -- An 85-year-old man drowned after being tossed from his riding lawnmower at his home near Cedar Bluffs. [...] Kavan was mowing his property a little before 8 p.m. Thorson said the mower overturned at an embankment, throwing Kavan into some nearby water, where he drowned.

[Hosakawa Tito]

Airing it out. to air is human, but to forgive is not memphis law enforcement policy

Time for a career change. Most Hopeless Job in the World

[Lemur]

Time for a career change. Most Hopeless Job in the World

Yah, I guess the Somali Navy is a pretty bad gig. But for sheer absurdity, I'll take the Bolivian Navy any day of the week. It's like having a Swiss Navy, only sillier.

From the shores of Lake Titicaca high in the Andes, you can still see the Bolivian navy puttering around, in the hope that they may, one day, see the bright blue ocean to the west once again. While La Paz stands on the abyss of civil war, its population starving and its economy in free fall, its leaders are strangely preoccupied with rectifying what has long been relegated to the history books.

A buddy of mine is from Bolivia, and he tells me that "Sea Day" is exactly as pathetic and hilarious as it sounds. Nothing better than a bunch of men in naval uniforms on gussied-up fishing boats talking about the sea in a landlocked nation.

[Fragony]

Dawn of a new era, the EU lifts the ban on non-straight cuccumbers, they are no longer VERBOTEN.

It is cheap, but is it good http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/worl...pled-over.html

[Husar]

I saw that, seems really weird, and I'm also glad that fake tan is out now.

[Louis VI the Fat]

Dawn of a new era, the EU lifts the ban on non-straight cuccumbers, they are no longer VERBOTEN.

It is cheap, but is it good http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/worl...pled-over.html

Four remarks:

The Daily Mail link links to an article about China.

Don't read the tabloids for your news.

'Verboten' - nice and sinister, the EU fascist superstate.

An EU ban on non-straight cucumbers is a myth. There has never existed one, and consequently, it has not been lifted. It exists only in the alternate universe of the tabloids / interwebs, together with Spiderman and alien abductions.

For more Euromyths, check here:
http://ec.europa.eu/unitedkingdom/pr.../myth26_en.htm

[Fragony]

Nonsense.

I know it links to fallen buildings, didn't feel like making a new post.

[Hosakawa Tito]

People with worse sex lives than you. Rumor has it she passed on the Pringles because she doesn't like it in the can.

[Hooahguy]

beaten by the lemur.

Woman agrees to sex for box of potato chips, gets arrested (so what happens if you buy her dinner and drinks and take her to a show?)



JUNE 24--Meet Lahoma Sue Smith. The Oklahoma woman, 36, copped a plea last week to a prostitution charge for accepting a box of Frito-Lay chips in exchange for oral sex. According to the below Oklahoma City Police Department report, john Faron Johnson told cops that he informed Smith that he did not have any money, but that she "agreed to give him a 'blow job' meaning oral sex, for a box of chips." Johnson, a Frito-Lay employee, provided Smith with a case of chips he valued at $30.

[Fragony]

But that is not weird that is sad

[Lemur]

Of all the DIY projects to pick ...

A man who gave himself a DIY circumcision using nail clippers was taken to hospital for emergency treatment. The young man had to be rushed to the Lister Hospital in Stevenage, Hertfordshire. [...] "This is something we would advise men never to attempt," a medic said, "The results can be quite horrific and long-lasting and have quite an affect on a man's sexual performance.

"Using a pair of nail clippers must have caused excruciating pain, even if he had had a few drinks beforehand."

[miotas]

Flying car crashes into a parked aeroplane

He hit a berm, which launched the car into the air, over a 52-foot-wide drainage ditch, Miller said.
When the car touched down, it struck a parked aircraft, flipped onto its top and smashed into a hangar wall,

[Lemur]

You have to admire a site that violates Godwin's Law from the outset:

Cats who look like Hitler

[miotas]

I had never heard of godwins law but wiki says

Godwin's Law (also known as Godwin's Rule of Nazi Analogies)[1] is a humorous observation coined by Mike Godwin in 1990, and which has become an Internet adage. It states: "As a Usenet discussion grows longer, the probability of a comparison involving Nazis or Hitler approaches 1."

So doesn't that site comply with Godwin's Law?

EDIT
Also, more proof that cats are evil

[Lemur]

So doesn't that site comply with Godwin's Law?

Ugh, yes, Godwin's Law merely states the probability of a Nazi/Hitler reference. However, the most-cited corollary to Godwin's Law is that the first person to bring up the Third Reich automatically loses the argument. But since nobody wants to say, "You violated the prime corollary of Godwin's Law," most people shorten it to just "Godwin's Law" and we all know what they mean.

The internets are complicated.

[Crazed Rabbit]

Ugh, yes, Godwin's Law merely states the probability of a Nazi/Hitler reference. However, the most-cited corollary to Godwin's Law is that the first person to bring up the Third Reich automatically loses the argument. But since nobody wants to say, "You violated the prime corollary of Godwin's Law," most people shorten it to just "Godwin's Law" and we all know what they mean.

The internets are complicated.

I think it's an important distinction. Mentioning nazis and/or hitler can be a valid point. Fulfilling Godwin's Law doesn't mean you lose the argument. It can be a logical fallacy, of course, but it's hardly unique in that.

And in weird news, a woman claims a dog forced her to steal money. And from WA state too.

CR

[Crazed Rabbit]

Four remarks:

The Daily Mail link links to an article about China.

Don't read the tabloids for your news.

'Verboten' - nice and sinister, the EU fascist superstate.

An EU ban on non-straight cucumbers is a myth. There has never existed one, and consequently, it has not been lifted. It exists only in the alternate universe of the tabloids / interwebs, together with Spiderman and alien abductions.

For more Euromyths, check here:
http://ec.europa.eu/unitedkingdom/pr.../myth26_en.htm

Hmm, so is the BBC now a Euro-skeptic tabloid?

Or do you simply look down on all British press as tabloids?

Curly cucumbers, crooked carrots and mottled mushrooms - odd-looking fruit and vegetables are making a comeback as 20-year-old EU rules are lifted.

Marketing standards for 26 types of produce have been scrapped, in a drive to cut EU bureaucracy.

The standards will remain in place for 10 of the most popular types. But with an appropriate label shops will be able to sell "ugly" specimens of these too.
...
Some 20% of produce is rejected by shops across the EU because it fails to meet the current requirements. [!!!-Ed.]

CR

[Fragony]

But of course.

I didn't click Louis's link, if you did, is one of the myths that the EU does not, I repeat, does not have the aspiration to become an undemocratic superstate with the ability to make up laws overruling our national constitutions??

That would be so wrong, please don't tell me it isn't true.

[Hooahguy]

Air New Zealand has nothing to hide

In its latest ad campaign, Air New Zealand has given new meaning to the overused business cliche "transparency." The struggling Kiwi airliner has decided to emphasize that, unlike its competitors, it has nothing to hide. Well, literally...

In the below video, extremely fit Air New Zealand employees draw raised eyebrows from travelers as they appear in body paint made to look like uniforms.

[Lemur]

One of the many reasons I hated doing performance reviews when I was corporate.

MADRID - Spanish police have arrested a man whom they suspect hired a contract killer to murder his boss in a desperate bid to avoid being laid off, newspaper El Pais reported on Tuesday.

The head of audiovisual services at the Barcelona International Convention Center contracted a Colombian man who shot and killed the director of the convention center on Feb 9, according to police.

The director had planned to lay off the arrested man as part of a restructuring project, police said.

In fear of losing his job, the head of services, through his sister, contracted a team of six Colombians who planned and carried out the killing, El Pais reported.

[Lemur]

Japanese fear invasion of giant jellyfish

Japanese researchers monitoring the activity of giant jellyfish in Chinese waters are warning of a potentially historic and catastrophic invasion this year.

Marine surveys conducted in late June have revealed alarming numbers of Nomura’s jellyfish — massive creatures that grow up to 2 meters (6 ft 7 in) in diameter and weigh as much as to 220 kilograms (about 450 lbs) — lurking in the Yellow Sea and East China Sea. The researchers warn that ocean currents may bring swarms of the monster jellies to Japan, which has been plagued by similar invasions in recent years.

[Fragony]

Nothing you know is a fact



http://fishki.net/comment.php?id=53738

[Vladimir]

Air New Zealand has nothing to hide

Those people couldn't get more than 5 comments in before the hate America posts began.

Nothing you know is a fact

http://fishki.net/comment.php?id=53738

Gotta love those Russian websites sneaking boobies in!