To answer your question CBR: Most players I know, who want to play 3v3 or 4v4 games have turned down their graphics settings to the lowest and have turned down unit size to the smallest. I am still using the PCs I used for MTW/VI and I can play and host 4v4s with a bit of lag (but the lag is not quite as bad as STW & MTW1's early days). Drops and lockups are the biggest problem for me and a few others I play with online. Once a game launches, things run fairly well.

I think those who are lagging, are trying to play with larger unit sizes and higher graphic settings. I know the game should play well at those levels, but it doesn't, and I think some are refusing to turn down the settings to help offset the lag.