Secret Weapon : French Trebuchet Snipers....

[Whacker]

This deplorable defamation of our products must CEASE immediately!

Our high quality doesn't NEED one of those newfangled "scope" contraptions, a shooter can drop a bovine chuck in a cistern from 100 yards with little to no effort! Further, this is NOT evil or black magic, all equipment is certified upon construction and blessed by corporate approved Imams or Priests*!

Just look at some of the amazing customer feedback we've had**!


AussieGiant - "This (product) is great! I fully and heartily endorse (product) and recommend it to anyone! now where's my money you worthless gits?!"

Mithrandir - "Camels do NOT stink!!" (Ed. note - Yes they do )

Tristan de Castelreng - "YOUR STUFF IS AWFUL! HOW DARE YOU TRY AND SELL THIS TRIPE!! I CAN'T BELIEVE OUR STUFF IS OUTSOLD BY THIS HOR*thonk* *loud unpleasant metal on flesh noises* (Ed. note - Err sorry about that, mixup at the interview booth!)

mad cat mech - "Where's my terminator cohorts with laser cannons!??!"

sapi - "ur banned lole"


On second thought, ignore all of that! Stop by today for special financing rates! All rights reserved.© MLXVI


* Available at buyer's option, no surcharge required, purchaser may possibly burn in their respective Hades© equivalant in the afterlife if blessings are not obtained.

** Statements may have been coerced from speaker under threat of harm or completely made up and cannot be attributed to person claimed to have made them.

Edit -

\/\/\/\/\/ WEEEE'VE got you covered my friend! Extra-large sized buckets and counterweights to fit ANY mother in law! Bulk discount pricing!