I'm sharing this largely because it made me laugh out loud. The kind of belly-laugh that had my three-year old demanding to know what's so funny, when all he can see is a page of text. If you need a PG-13 grin, please enjoy The Viagra Prank. (Among other things, there are some outrageously good puns.)
A small sample:
AMERIMED: Thank you for calling AmeriMed, I'm Evelyn, how can I help you?
JOHN HARGRAVE: Hi, I recently put in an order for a prescription, and I was denied. The response you guys sent me was actually rather rude.
AM: All right ... what were you ordering?
JH: Viagra.
AM: OK, let's see. [Pause] It looks like it was denied because the doctor couldn't find the medical necessity, and probably because of all the excess medications you're taking.
JH: Such as?
AM: Ah ... you do smoke marijuana?
JH: Only in the shower.
AM: Prednisone, Azmacort, Alupent ... do you have asthma?
JH: Only since I started smoking marijuana.
AM: Well, [Viagra] is one medication he would prefer ... he would prefer you see a doctor. It's for your benefit, it's not an insult, it's simply that he feels that for your health, you should see a local doctor.
JH: But your web site says that AmeriMed was founded to help me avoid "an embarrassing conversation with my personal physician."
AM: Uh huh, but that's if it's approved ... this physician is not going to approve it.
JH: Is there another physician we could ask?
AM: No, we are very strict in our regulations, and we have to ask that you go see a local doctor.
JH: Look, Evelyn. I need a longer erection in my penis. Can you help me with this?
AM: I wish that I could help you, but I can't. I suggest you see a local doctor.
JH: Don't you understand that I have a condition? I am not well!
AM: Sir, I ...
JH: I can sometimes only make love for one hour. Do you know how embarrassing that is? I mean, you're a woman. You know what I'm talking about here, don't you?
AM: I do understand, however again, I can't help you. You're going to have to see your local doctor.
JH: I don't believe this. Evelyn, listen to me: I can only sustain an erection for one hour, two hours tops.
AM: I realize that, and I don't mean to be insensitive. Again, I'm ... this isn't meant as an insult to you personally. We just can't help you, unless you can get a prescription from your local doctor.
JH: Would you deny medication to a dying child?
AM: I don't...
JH: Well, my penis is like a dying child.
AM: [Growing increasingly agitated] Sir, I cannot continue this conversation.
JH: How about you guys send me the Viagra, bill me an extra $50, and we'll call it even.
AM: I cannot do that, you're asking me to not only compromise my licensing, but...
JH: Oh, you guys are licensed?
AM: [Clearly offended] Yes.
JH: Oh! Oh ... oh. Oh. Well, that's a different story.
AM: You're asking me to compromise my licensing, and we simply cannot do this.
JH: Look, Evelyn. Would you be willing to personally fill the prescription for me, and maybe I can pay you for your services?
AM: Mr. Hargrave, I cannot continue this conversation. I have other calls to attend to.
JH: Could we meet up in an alley somewhere?
AM: All right, I'm going to take this call rather offensively. I'm letting you know that this is an offensive conversation, and I am going to hang up.
Really funny and some of the other ones he does are classic too, like going into an Au Naturale store and buying "Natural" products to eat.
"A man may fight for many things: his country, his principles, his friends, the glistening tear on the cheek of a golden child. But personally, I'd mudwrestle my own mother for a ton of cash, an amusing clock and a stack of French porn."
- Edmund Blackadder
The Viagra Prank
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