You know you're [country] when...

[CountArach]

You know you're Australian when the beer you drink is larger than you.

[Samurai Waki]

You know your a Montanan when going to the grocery store involves hiking over the Rocky Mountain Divide, descending into thick forests, a jont through moose infested swampland, sailing down the river, and somehow finally ending up in a small town that doesn't have one.

[Evil_Maniac From Mars]

You know you're Bavarian when the sausage you eat for breakfast is white.

[RoadKill]

You know your Canadian when...

1) You end your sentence with eh? every single time
2) Every sentence has a swear word in it
3) when people ask if you wear snowshoes and ride huskies (we seriously don't)

[Beirut]

You know your Canadian when...

1) You end your sentence with eh? every single time
2) Every sentence has a swear word in it
3) when people ask if you wear snowshoes and ride huskies (we seriously don't)

4) You apologize if someone steps on your foot. (I swear to God it happens.)

[Louis VI the Fat]

None are mine, but here goes:

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

You know that you’re French…

- When you think that French fries aren’t French at all, but from Belgium

- When you think that yogurt is from Bulgaria

- When you call a baguette sliced in two and filled with a steak and French fries « un sandwich américain »

- When you think that Coca Cola and Mac Donald’s are “just for kids”

- When you consider a Coke with whisky as a suitable drink for teenagers

- When a President becomes popular after it has been proven that he has several mistresses

- When you can tell the political views of anybody by the cheese he / she prefers

- When you call an 80 kilometer drive “a journey”

- When you’re able to guess the nationality of a tourist by his clothes

- When you think that a good evening meal with friends must have at least one big argument

- When you can't think of translation in French for TMI 'Too Much Information', because, I mean really, do you ever say too much?

- When you think that a glass of white wine at 10 am is good for the health

- When you call "an affair" "un flirt"

- When you go on strike to preserve the right to go on strike

- When Lafayette means “big store with affordable sexy lingerie” to you

- When you think that Quebecois are “courageous and strong people with a funny accent”

- When you think the only food outside France that’s acceptable to eat is Italian

- When you say “That’s the worst haircut I’ve ever seen” when you meet somebody with a bad haircut

- When you only see a movie after having read ten different critics who liked it

- When you think that you know the USA when you have traveled one week to New York, one other week to San Francisco

- When you consider an air rifle as a lethal weapon

- When you think that “un libéral” is a neo-con and “un républicain” is a Democrat

- When you think that saying “You’re right” is a sign of weakness (you should say “You’re not wrong”).

- When you’re used to seeing pictures of naked, or halfnaked women on billboards

- When you can’t think of a translation in French of the sentence “That's you’re opinion, and I respect that”

[Boyar Son]

you know your American when

-the immigrants are "tryin ta git ar jobs"
-everyone hates you and you dont know why but dont want to admit it it or else you're a european/arab/terrorist (or self hating dem)
-good for the saudi's business
-own at least 5 US flags
-own at least 10 foreign flags

[RoadKill]

you know your American when

-the immigrants are "tryin ta git ar jobs"
-everyone hates you and you dont know why but dont want to admit it it or else you're a european/arab/terrorist (or self hating dem)
-good for the saudi's business
-own at least 5 US flags
-own at least 10 foreign flags

You also know your american when you make fun of Canadians.

[Marshal Murat]

You know when your American...

• You get angry at Canadians for using 'Celsius' and 'Meters'
• You get angry at Mexico and the immigrants they send over
• You get angry at Venezuela for electing Chavez
• You get angry at Iran for electing Ahmadinijad
• You can't spell Ahmadinajad. I'm-a-dinner-jacket.
• You still can't spell Ahmadinigad
• You get angry at France for being sissies. Then they elected Sarkozy.
• You are angry at Russia for being Communists.
• You forget that Russia is no longer Communist
• You get angry at China for selling you lead-tainted toys
• So you go buy a Japanese television, filled with lead.
• You can name only five Presidents, but you can rattle off football stats
• You call it football, and dare anyone to tell you different
• You think of 'across the pond' as that restaurant on the lake
• You wonder why we care about North Korea
• You can't decide who won the 2000 Presidental election, but if they had American Idol election system, there wouldn't be a problem
• You think that global warming is a hoax
• You think that global warming is a fact
• Calling someone a 'redneck' is a slur
• calling someone a 'liberal' is a slur
• calling someone a 'Yankee' is a slur
  
  
  
  So you can't comprehend why terrorists call you 'angry', 'ignorant', or 'surly'
  Or maybe it's because you can't think of the definition of 'angry', 'ignorant', or 'surly'. Maybe if the terrorists understood 'America' 'Freedom' and 'Fried Chicken' they wouldn't be so angry, ignorant, or surly.

[Fragony]

None are mine, but here goes:

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

You know that you’re French…

- When you think that French fries aren’t French at all, but from Belgium

- When you think that yogurt is from Bulgaria

- When you call a baguette sliced in two and filled with a steak and French fries « un sandwich américain »

- When you think that Coca Cola and Mac Donald’s are “just for kids”

- When you consider a Coke with whisky as a suitable drink for teenagers

- When a President becomes popular after it has been proven that he has several mistresses

- When you can tell the political views of anybody by the cheese he / she prefers

- When you call an 80 kilometer drive “a journey”

- When you’re able to guess the nationality of a tourist by his clothes

- When you think that a good evening meal with friends must have at least one big argument

- When you can't think of translation in French for TMI 'Too Much Information', because, I mean really, do you ever say too much?

- When you think that a glass of white wine at 10 am is good for the health

- When you call "an affair" "un flirt"

- When you go on strike to preserve the right to go on strike

- When Lafayette means “big store with affordable sexy lingerie” to you

- When you think that Quebecois are “courageous and strong people with a funny accent”

- When you think the only food outside France that’s acceptable to eat is Italian

- When you say “That’s the worst haircut I’ve ever seen” when you meet somebody with a bad haircut

- When you only see a movie after having read ten different critics who liked it

- When you think that you know the USA when you have traveled one week to New York, one other week to San Francisco

- When you consider an air rifle as a lethal weapon

- When you think that “un libéral” is a neo-con and “un républicain” is a Democrat

- When you think that saying “You’re right” is a sign of weakness (you should say “You’re not wrong”).

- When you’re used to seeing pictures of naked, or halfnaked women on billboards

- When you can’t think of a translation in French of the sentence “That's you’re opinion, and I respect that”

If you just made that up I call you pappa