You know you're [country] when...

**Quid** · 10-15-2007, 18:51

You know you're Swiss when...

1. you complain if your bus/train/tram is more than 5 minutes late. Make that 1 minute

2. you've ever been confused with a Swede

3. you laugh when Americans believe that Swiss Miss is a Swiss product, but then have no clue that Nestlé and Rolex ARE

4. you get frustrated if you go grocery shopping abroad and there aren't at least 10 different kinds of chocolate and 15 kinds of cheese available

5. you have learned three to four languages and think this is completely normal

6. you have ever been asked - upon stating your nationality - whether you live in the mountains and whether you can yodel

7. you can pronounce "Chuchichäschtli" and you know what it means

8. you have ever been asked who the president of Switzerland is and then failed miserably trying to explain why you've lost track

9. you know what "Röschti" are and you have crossed the "Röschtigrabe" at some point

10. you went to a state-funded ski camp every year with your classmates in high school

11. to you, skis are like the extensions of your feet, because you've skied since you could walk

12. you are amused when people ask you what language is spoken in your home country and/or you have to explain that "Swiss" is not a language, that there are four national languages and none of them is called "Swiss"!

13. you owned a Swatch growing up... or still do

14. you've ever seen "Sandmännchen" dubbed into Romansch

15. as a female, you give all your friends three kisses on the cheeks as a greeting

16. you love Migros and you swear that some of their products are better than anything you've ever seen elsewhere

17. you've ever been asked by your non-Swiss friends to intervene in a fight and used "hey, I'm Swiss" as an excuse not to

18. your country has six different public television channels in three different languages - and you don't think this is unusual

19. you get amused when you see Swiss German people being subtitled on German television

20. you firmly believe it is more important to do things accurately than to do them quickly

21. you were legally allowed to drink beer and wine at the age of sixteen

22. you walked to kindergarten without supervision, wearing a large orange triangle around your neck

23. you think it's normal that everyone has a bunker underneath their house, or is registered for one of the public bunkers under the school building, for emergency situations... by the way, here's a fun thing to do: invite over some of your foreign friends (Americans make very good candidates) and take a picture of the look on their face when they SEE the bunker. Priceless!

24. when being asked to explain how certain things work in your country, you have to use the phrase "it differs for each canton, so..."

25. you are asked to vote on a "Referendum" or "Initiative" at least 3 or 4 times a year

26. you are used to drinking from any public fountain in the street unless there is a warning sign that says "no drinking water"

27. you grew up believing all cows must wear bells

28. you think that driving somewhere for four hours is a hell of a long time

29. you get slightly irritated or at least confused if your foreign visitors ask to see a chocolate factory

30. you know what Betty Bossi books and products are and have bought one

31. you know someone that collects the tin foil lids from coffee cream tubs

32. you don't see where the problem is when every male citizen who has been to the army has an assault rifle under his bed

33. you have to pay twice the price for museum entries because you're not a citizen of the EU, although you live in Europe!

34. you are in a non-European country and can hear people talking Swiss
German and just go up and strike up a conversation with a complete stranger

35. no matter how much of a "bad-ass" you think you are, you will still pick up your candy wrapper off the floor if an old lady asks you too

36. you think everything is cheap abroad compared to Swiss prices!

Found this on Facebook (cringe). Thought it was amusing. Most of them are actually very true and not some figment of imagination.

Quid

**Fragony** · 10-15-2007, 19:53

Well I love Swiss, Zurich is cosy in a small town way but big in a big one way. Great fontain, looks even better when paragliding

**Fragony** · 10-15-2007, 19:55

of course I mean geneva lol

**Slug For A Butt** · 10-15-2007, 20:22

You know you're Deep South American when...

1) You can't marry youre childhood sweetheart because there is a law against it.

2) Your family tree has no branches.

3) Your wife has hives on her beer belly and you find that sexy.

4) You come back from the dump with more than you take.

5) You've been involved in a custody battle over a pig.

6) You hit on girls in the VD clinic.

7) You give your family items of livestock for christmas.

8) Your wife is also your mother/sister.

**CountArach** · 10-15-2007, 21:37

You know you're Australian when the beer you drink is larger than you.

**Samurai Waki** · 10-15-2007, 21:50

You know your a Montanan when going to the grocery store involves hiking over the Rocky Mountain Divide, descending into thick forests, a jont through moose infested swampland, sailing down the river, and somehow finally ending up in a small town that doesn't have one.

**Kekvit Irae** · 10-16-2007, 07:38

Originally Posted by Slug For A Butt

You know you're Deep South American when...

1) You can't marry youre childhood sweetheart because there is a law against it.

2) Your family tree has no branches.

3) Your wife has hives on her beer belly and you find that sexy.

4) You come back from the dump with more than you take.

5) You've been involved in a custody battle over a pig.

6) You hit on girls in the VD clinic.

7) You give your family items of livestock for christmas.

8) Your wife is also your mother/sister.

**naut** · 10-16-2007, 08:07

This is one I heard somewhere:

You know you're Aussie when... you take a BBQ to a race riot.

**Slug For A Butt** · 10-16-2007, 21:57

Originally Posted by Slug For A Butt

You know you're Deep South American when...

1) You can't marry youre childhood sweetheart because there is a law against it.

2) Your family tree has no branches.

3) Your wife has hives on her beer belly and you find that sexy.

4) You come back from the dump with more than you take.

5) You've been involved in a custody battle over a pig.

6) You hit on girls in the VD clinic.

7) You give your family items of livestock for christmas.

8) Your wife is also your mother/sister.

Originally Posted by Kekvit Irae

Hey man at least you've got Lynard Skynard instead of the Spice Girls, Every cloud has a silver lining and all that...

**El Diablo** · 10-17-2007, 01:36

You know your a Kiwi when:

You know that a "Moa" is pronounced "mower" and was a kick ass big bird,

You know the words and actions to the Haka even though you are probably a pasty, weedy, white guy and look as threatening Mother Teresa performing it,

You blame, Suzie the waitress, Stu Barnes or underarm bowling for any national sporting losses rather than being beaten by a better team on the day,

KNOW THAT PAV WAS INVENTED IN NZ!!!

Claim Phar Lap - but let Aussie have Russell Crowe,

You can behave like a goon when in the UK and not worry as everyone assumes by your accent that you are an Aussie,

You can behave like a goon (with Aussies) when in Europe and not worry as everyone assumes by your accent that you are English,

Have a full (sober) conversation with a fellow english speaking Scotsman and have neither of you understand a word - other than "Gidday" and eh "Jimmy"

Can pronounce Maori place names like Whangari, Wanganui, Paraparaumu and not laugh at the first part of Whakatane.

Can accept letting the Aussie win now and then just to stop them invading us.