Council of Britain and Ireland

[Privateerkev]

The Scottish diplomats furiously scribble down everything King Henry says. The fear of angering their lord's father-in-law only makes them write faster. Finally one gets the courage to stammer something out.

M-mmm-m-my King!

If I may be so bold, could you please tell me what settlement it was that the Welsh besieged? And is it still under siege? Or did the Welsh take it? If they took it, did the Welsh exterminate it?

King Alexander was under the impression this whole time that the Welsh had actually besieged Cardiff. He thought that while it was foolish of the Welsh to besiege something they were about to be given, he was not angry.

But the possible extermination of an English town changes things. I will get this news off to my...The diplomat is interrupted by King Alexander barging back into the Council

The Welsh did what!?!?!?!

Let this be clear right now, if the Welsh did indeed exterminate an English town, I will never deal with them again!

This is preposterous! And to think that I have been trying to moderate on the Welsh's behalf behind the scenes! Are these people even capable of rational thought!?!

Alexander calms down and realizes his father-in-law is sitting in the room. He quickly regains his composure.

King Henry! It is so good to see you again! Got enough of the sanity in London and decided to come get a dose of craziness here in the Council?

Alexander says the last with a slight smile.

I think I've been left out of the dark far too long with regards to these Welsh troubles. Please, tell this council all about what you have suffered at the hands of these mad-men. Leave nothing out. And I do indeed want to know if the Welsh exterminated Englishmen. If it is true, I will have to restrain my wife from picking up a sword and charging a whole regiment of Welsh herself.

She could probably beat them all too. Bunch of cowards besieging cities and murdering civilians...

Realizing he is standing in the middle of the Council and taking up it's valuable time with what is essentially a private conversation, Alexander politely excuses himself, yields the floor, and sits back at the Scottish table.

[Zim]

King Henry smiles as he sees his Son-in-Law

I wouldn't go so far as to consider London a bastion of Sanity, but compared to here it's charms seem much greater than I had before thought.

THere is not much to tell. The town in question is the Majority English town of Shrewsbury, around the middle of the English/Welsh border. The Welsh King would apparently exterminate the vast majority of the population that is English, so as to control it more easily. It was still under siege when last I checked. The fort in question is just to the west of the town, still in English lands.

I am not sure if the Welsh have exterminated it, as they had before claimed. If not, there is still hope for peace. I have men looking into that issue. I am sorry you have not been fully informed of the issues between the Welsh and me. As contradictory as their statements have been, this is perfectly understandable.

I do not doubt that my daughter could take on a Welsh regiment singlehandedly, but perhaps she had better stay in Perth.

King Henry smiles as he makes this last statement.

[Privateerkev]

King Alexander, obviously more calm now,

Thank you King Henry for making that more clear. This whole time I thought it was Cardiff they held. Since Cardiff is Welsh, and was going to be given up by you anyways, my response was more limited. But attacking an English city and threatening to kill all of the English in it changes things.

King Llewelyn better hope that he was only bluffing. If he goes through with his threat, that will change things. I have been exerting a lot of effort and influence to broker a deal that would satisfy all parties. But if he is going to be that unreasonable, then he is lucky he even has a Kingdom to rule.

I will make this very clear. If any man directs the extermination of my wife's people, I will no longer deal with them. And I will aid my father-in-law in any way he asks to protect his people.

War is one thing. Murdering civilians is something quite different. I do not want to see anyone cross that line.

[RoadKill]

The English representative stands

If King Lewllyn really did not follow through on his threat, and really seeks peace, then the deal before agreed on can still take place. Cardiff will be given to the Welsh, and the Welsh will abandon their fort on English soil and their siege of the English town. If, however, this is another ruse, then may God have mercy on King Lewllyn, because King Henry surely will not.

OOC: Noooooo.... Well this is unfortunate, I already carried out the attacks in my turn...

[RoadKill]

The fridendly tanned diplomat stands up grinning at the Scottish King, shaking his head:

And I thought, we were the ones being rational here. The deal was too late. The message was not delievered to King Lewllyn in time. Before the messanger could reach him he have already taken the english settlement, and also asked another of his general to attack Cardiff and claim it by force. This is not what we hoped for. But as we all understand it is too late for the attacks to be withdrawn. And before you highlanders treat us as if we were scum, we DID NOT EXTERMINATE THE ENGLISH SETTLEMENT!

The diplomat boomed his voice so that ever soul could hear.

We may have been from pirates and bandit background, but we welsh are more civilized then that. Every single men, women and child was left unharmed, untouched by our soldiers. And it is pointed out by King Lewllyn himself that he was not here to kill the civilians, the war is between the two kingdoms and the people left inbetween have NOTHING to do with this conflict. And if you bazzards have even listned to our previous messages, you would have understood by now.

Calming down the diplomat regained his grin.

As stated before, it is too late since the settlements already have been asssaulted. It seems that anger has gotten into the soul of both of us.

[Zim]

King Henry stands, glowering

But you did receive the message in time. In fact, you spent weeks threatening to exterminate the town while we attempted to appeal to your "reasonable" nature. Only long after many attempts to settle this peacefully failed due to Welsh intransigence did you take Shrewsbury.

By the second season from now an army shall march on Shrewsbury. Should their be any Welsh soldiers in it, they will be trapped and killed or forced to give up their arms. Should the town be found to be depopulated, we shall march on Wales. If the town has not been exterminated nor sacked, then possibly a ceasefire can be signed and negotiation over Cardiff take place. In that case, Wales will be charged for any missing income from the loss of Shrewsbury, and buildings they destroy, an for reparations for the families who have lost loved ones to Welsh bloodlust. If need be, nonessential buildings in Cardiff can be stripped for this purpose.

[RoadKill]

The diplomat this time did not bother standing and spoke:

There will be no problem in that. But we can not agree to everything. If buildings will be stripped from Cardiff, we will not rebuild the city for you. But if you agree to leave Cardiff unharmed, then we swear an oath to repair the walls we have inflicted damage towards. And if a trade rights agreement can also be arranged then we will also be happy to give you back the fort on the border. But if trade agreements and not arranged we will not give you the fort at the border. I hope these plans take place better then the last.


OOC: Yah, Zim sorry, for all the confusion. It is because I played the save before we we got all these agreements done, but i didn't upload it, but then after we had all this discussion I played the turn a second turn, but then with my stupidity. I uploaded the previous save instead and the right one so, I had to play it IC, haha sorry.

[Zim]

One of the English representatives stands

England does not like this shifting back and forth between different stances. At any rate, if Shrewsbury has not been exterminated, I think some arrangement can be made. An army will be moved to the city next campaigning season. It might take one more to reach it. If Shrewsbury is empty of Welsh soldiers by then, we will abandon Cardiff. A diplomat will also be sent to sign a ceasefire and sign trade rights.

OOC: Hey, rulers make decisions they come to regret all the time in real life. It's best just to roll with it and take it IC. A deal isn't out of question yet.

[Zim]

The English Representaive stands again to address the Council.

The English campaigning season is over. The English fort has been reoccupied. Shrewsbury has not been exterminated, but it has been sacked. King Henry himself has led an army of knights to siege Shrewsbury, as the Welsh have now sieged Cardiff. However, a diplomat has been sent to the Welsh to sign a ceasefire, trading Cardiff and Shrewsbury, offering a trade agreement, and demanding 1,000 floring to rebuild Shrewsbury and give money to the widows and orphans the Welsh have created. If the Welsh agree, their army in Shrewsbury is free to leave.

If not, King Henry assaults next season.

In lighter news, King Henry's daughter Beatrice has fallen in love with and married an honorable young nobleman named Arthur Hammer.

[RoadKill]

The Welsh diplomat scratches his chin, thinking of the right decision to make and speaks after a long pause

We welsh are not rich, 1000 florins can really stick a dagger in our nation.

The diplomat once again scratches his chin and thinks hard

But it is a dagger in our nation we are willing to take. King Lewllyn will be more then grateful to have a way to pay for those orphans and widows. But we have a different approach to this. We will completly repair all damage applied to Shrewsbury and we will also pay 400 florins. But if this is not agreeable then we shall pay the 1000 florins, but will leave Shrewsbury damaged. King Lewllyn an his army will leave Shrewsbury immidiatly. The seige of Cardiff will also be laid back.

[Zim]

The English representative sits stunned for a moment. He seems shocked that Wales actually took the peaceful option.

Either arrangement is fine. If you pay 1,000, this will end next turn (allowing you to defray some of the costs by getting Cardiff right away). Then we would repair the walls. Otherwise, it will take one more season (until my turn so I can accept). We leave the choice up to you.

[RoadKill]

The Welsh diplomat puts on a happy face and changed his mind

You are right, occupying Cardiff will provide us and return some of the 1000 given florins. We will take that option. Now lets hope in the future things will work out well.

[Privateerkev]

King Alexander, obviously pleased with the new events, speaks,

I'm glad the Welsh are willing to be reasonable. If events are concluded to King Henry's satisfaction, then I believe relations between the Scots and the Welsh will be possible. A diplomat is sailing over to Wales as we speak.

[Privateerkev]

King Alexander gets a report. Upon reading it, he addresses the council.

Gentlemen, it has been brought to my attention that the Norse are besieging the rebel settlement of Skye. Since no one could possibly dispute our claim on such a predominantly Scottish settlement, we can only reasonably conclude that the Norse are doing it as a favor to us. I believe they are attempting to deplete the garrison in order to make it easier for us to then take the settlement.

I appreciate such assistance from the Norse but I am now informing them that such assistance is no longer necessary. My army has taken Inverlochly and is now marching to the west coast where they will embark a ship that is already present for the short trip to Skye. My forces will take custody of Skye next season and we will no longer need the Norwegian's assistance in this matter.

We trust there will be no problem what-so-ever and the handover will be completed promptly and peacefully.

[RoadKill]

The Welsh diplomat lets out a quick giggle

I highly doubt the Norse are beseiging it and sacraficing their own lives to give you the settlement.

[Privateerkev]

King Alexander says

Seeing as the Norse are now a peaceful people, and would never dream of instigating conflict with another Kingdom in Brittania, I could only surmise that they were doing it to help us out.

I again wish to express my heartfelt thanks to King Haakon for his assistance in this matter. But we are now prepared to land a very large force upon the Isle of Skye and assault the settlement ourselves.

Seeing as Skye has a population that is 87% Scottish, we assume no one will contest this right and proper assertion of my authority to rule over my own people.

[Cheetah]

The norwegian representative returns.

The news reached us that King Alexander is waiting for our "official response". We have already said everything that was needed to say. We will deliver our further response on the battlefield.

Accordingly, the rebel settlement of Skye was taken and the rule of King Haakon was reestablished.

Both scottish fleets around Skye was deated.

Scottish general Alexander Cymon was defeated.

Inverness is beseiged and will be taken on the next campaign season.

The cowardly assasination of Prince Magnus by the Irish was taken as a declaration of war.

Accordingly, King O'Brain and his army attempting to embark on the irish fleet was intercepted, defeated and put to the sword. King O'Brian was executed.

The same fate awaits anyone who dares to oppose the mighty King Haakon.

We said it clearly that he is back to reclaim all his lands. Make no mistake, it means war: TOTAL WAR.

Further responses will be delivered on the battlefield. If you wish to argue with us, first you should learn our languge, which is the language of strenght and bravery.

The norwegian representative leaves the council.

*edit: irish fleet instead of welsh

[Privateerkev]

King Alexander sighs,

Then war it is then. But make no mistake, it is total war. War to the end.

Anyone who joins Scotland in wiping these pirates off of Brittania will be remembered as loyal allies.

Anyone who aids the pirates will be regarded as enemies.

It is time for the people of Brittania to speak with one voice and make clear that we do not bow to bullies. When we are done, Brittania will be 4 Kingdoms. And then there will be peace.

The Norse started this but by God we will end it!

[Zim]

King Henry walks into the Council Chamber, this time wearing a suit of armor rather than fine clothing.

King Haakon has forced my hand. Although I had wished for peace among the five Kingdoms of these Isles it appears that after the smoke clears there will be four at most. As invaders of these lands, and aggresors in the war with my daughter's Kingdom, it is the Norse who bear the moral burden of this war. England officially declares war on the Norse. We will stand with the Celtic Kingdoms against your piracy and aggression, and stay in the fight until one of us is destroyed.

[Cheetah]

The norwegian representative returns.

We did not expect anything else from the coward Scottish King then to hide behind his father-in-law.

But that is fine with us. We said total war. We do not back down. One more King to kill.

[Privateerkev]

King Alexander says,

Coward?!?

You attacked me remember?

Your just bitter because you couldn't get any of the other Kingdoms to support your piracy campaign.

Come into the Highlands my dear dear vikings. I assure you that you will get quite a reception...

[Cheetah]

The norvegian representative says

We are not surprised at all that the Scottish King lagging behind in the matters of own country seeing how he prefers parading around in the council in full armour instead of leading his troops on the battlefield. But ... we are already in the Highlands! Inverness is under siege and will be captured in the next campaign season. King Alexander would be better off returning to his country to gather a relief force, provided that he can find enough man in Scotland, rather than sharpening his oratory skills.

And no, we do not need help, only cowards hide behind their allies. We can handle all the women the Scottish King can throw at us.

[Privateerkev]

King Alexander sits looking bored,

I see the Norse need a geography lesson as well. The Highlands are clearly south of Inverness. Therefore, if you are at Inverness, then you can not be in the Highlands. If your King wishes, I can write that out so he can sit and study it. I understand he seems to be slow in realizing things.

Such as realizing that besieging Inverness was not some great coup. I left it undefended as a sign of peace towards the Norwegian people. A mistake I know, but one that, at the time, seemed reasonable.

During my next campaign season, if I can not relieve the siege, I will simply make the Castle useless to Norway. I will raze every building to the ground. And I will disband the unit of peasants in the castle. Since there will be no opposition, your troops will peacefully occupy the castle when you do not command them. (OOC: by forcing you to take an empty castle outside of your turn, you will not be given the option to sack.)

So, you will peacefully occupy an empty castle full of angry Scottish citizens. This will cost you far more money than it will gain you. I can then retake the castle at my leisure.

In the meantime, I will mobilize my reserves and march on your lands. All you've done is attack a lone general, 2 empty (or almost empty) ships, and besiege, what will be, a useless castle.

Seeing as Scotland is not really threatened, I will remain here in order to keep pointing out your faulty logic.

As for how the Norse "handle" Scottish women, the Scots remember all too well what has happened in previous viking raids. Unable to convince a woman to bed him, a viking then resorts to rape.

I am confident our women would be able to give you quite a fight. I'd let them at you if I wasn't afraid of what our women would do to the men after we capture them. While I will not weep for any dead Norse, castration is a nasty way to go...

[RoadKill]

The Welsh diplomat looks displeased

Destroy your own settlement? Because it is beseiged by an enemy. Your words do not reflect kindly on your reputation Scottish. That is a way a coward fights, and I am sure the Scottish is not a coward. Scottish men will still live in the captured settlement, and destroying everything they hold ever so dearly is NOT the right choice. So once again, I hope you reconsider these actions of brute force, as it will not help this conflict at all.

[Privateerkev]

King Alexander,

Their my buildings and if I wish to raze them, I will. My people would rather that the Norse capture a hollow husk, instead of a vibrant settlement. Plus, if they hadn't besieged it under a banner of peace, I wouldn't be forced into this situation.

Now, any more comments regarding MY Kingdom?!?

[Cheetah]

*a deep voice from a faraway sea*

It is not yours, its all MIIIINEEEEeee .....

ps.

[phonicsmonkey]

A new Irish delegation has arrived. They relieve the current team, who leave. The new representative stands.

I bring word from the new King of the Island of Ireland, Domnall of Brian.

"The Norse invasion of County Down will not be tolerated.

The cowardly murder of my father the late King Brian (God rest his soul), who was touring the County building watchtowers with a small group of close friends and retainers, was a crime of war which cannot go unpunished.

Ireland demands that the invading force disband immediately, and that the murderer Knud be handed over to Irish justice.

Should these demands not be met, the entirety of the Norse population in these Isles will be hunted down and slain, and their ships scuttled like those our brave Irish navy engaged off the coast of County Down last week.

So speaks King Domnall of Ireland."

[Privateerkev]

*a deep voice from a faraway sea*

It is not yours, its all MIIIINEEEEeee .....

King Alexander tilts his head, then speaks,

Did any of you hear that? It sounded like whimpering. Must have been coming from the Norwegian embassy...

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

OOC:

[Cheetah]

The norvegian representative says

Hah, the irish represenative talking about cowardly murder! Must be the joke of the week. Or perhaps the joke of the weak .... Muhahaha

Also, what small group of friends and retainers, he means that more than 400 men strong army that was marching to embark the irish fleet? Also, what crime? There was a face-to face battle as real men fight, unlike the cowardly assasination of Prince Magnus.
As we said we deliver our arguments on the battlefield as real men do. King Brian, despite the large numbers he had, was found short of good arguments. ... Muhahaha ... We do hope that King Domnall is better equipped as Prince Knud wants a worthy opponent!

[Privateerkev]

King Alexander strides into the Council.

Gentlemen,

and the Norse rapists...

I have some news on the war that the Norse started on my people.

The Scottish general that the Norse had earlier attacked, Alexander Cymon, had fled to Inverness right before the castle was sieged by a Norwegian general and 9 viking units.

Knowing that all was lost, Cymon volunteered for a suicide assignment. Riding out with just his bodyguards and some peasants, Cymon attacked the besieging army. While he did die, the Norse were so incensed, that they ran after the routed into the castle without thinking. So busy they were with pursuit and battle that they forgot to sack, and instead, peacefully occupied the castle. Also, before he left for his last ride, Cymon set fire to every single useful building in Inverness. The Norse now own a useless castle filled with angry Scotsmen. Congratulations...

Speaking of Inverness, the longboat that took the besieging Norse army there, was attacked and driven off.

In other naval news, a Norse longboat was found just north of Wales with two catapult units. Why the Norse had catapults so close to the Welsh capital is anyone's guess. But, the longboat is sunk and those catapults rest on the bottom of the sea.

I now ask for a moment of silence in the Council for brave Alexander Cymon...

Alexander bows his head.