Pirate Ship Mafia II [Concluded]

[Choxorn]

In the interests of not putting all my eggs in one basket, I shall Elect: Zaccino, and later bribe TinCow for the position of Three Eighths Mate if he wins.

[johnhughthom]

As the resident Pirate Lawyer, I do feel the need to point out that the Four Horsemen could recruit without becoming the Five Horsemen. The additional personages could simply be given other titles. The classic example would be, of course, the Three Musketeers, which was actually a quartet since d'Artagnan always seemed to show up wherever they went, but wasn't technically a Musketeer. They could also go the musical route and add names to the group, like TinCow and the Four Horsemen. However, that kind of system would probably not work well as the Four Horsemen would inherently have to take the place of the backup band, which I doubt they'd appreciate. Plus, I can't sing. Alternatively, they could just go the classic corporate route and have positions like Assistant, Deputy Assistant, Deputy Undersecretary, and Assistant to the Senior Deputy Undersecretary. In fact, each Horseman could have an entire staff of his or her own, just append 'Department of Pestilence,' et al. to the aforementioned titles.

With this post, you have just proved you are only a 'lawyer' and not a 'pirate lawyer'. The pirate lawyer response would be to say "Arrr, me client said walk the plank." Then shove a cutlass up my behind.

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

For which I am gratetful, imagine the fees a pirate lawyer would charge for that consultation...

[Xenoneb]

Elect: TinCow
I'll give 20 gold for the position of first mate, Tin.

[Visor]

Elect: Jolt

[El Barto]

Erect: Zaccino Belay that! I be selling me vote in this Erection. I be wanting to be paid in gold.

How can the Four Horsemen recruit? If you don't have four members yet, then you are lying and fraudulently misrepresenting the situation to prospective recruits. If you do have four members, then the first person to join will make it the Five Horsemen of the Apocalypse, again fraudulently misrepresenting the terms of this offer. I expect to see a redrafting of this, or I shall contact my nearest Pirate lawyer.

Ye can join their pairty wivou' ye becoming a horseman, mate. What good would a horse do on board, but increase expenses from feeding it?

[Diana Abnoba]

*flips a gold piece* Elect: Zaccino Arr well that be me choice then. *takes another swig of rum* Now don't ya be forgetting me when ya pick yarr First Mate and Quartermaster, or at least yarr second Mate and eighthmaster.

If me don't gets any of the above jobs, then I would be looking for work mister Chaotix. I needs the golds, ya know to romance the womens, whens we get back to Nassau. I'm very handy with me sword.

[Zack]

I'd like to remind everyone that due to my recruiting prowess, I have by far the most money in the game. Zaccino doesn't forget friends. Yarr.

[El Barto]

I'd like to remind everyone that due to my natural lack of trust, I have by far the most need of real stuff instead of the promises. El barto doesn't forget his supplies. Yarr.

[Ishmael]

I'd like to remind everyone that due to my recruiting prowess, I have by far the most money in the game. Zaccino doesn't forget friends. Yarr.

So you do. I'd best steal some of that tonight then, can't be having any one person get too far ahead.

[TinCow]

I'd like to remind everyone that due to my recruiting prowess, I have by far the most money in the game. Zaccino doesn't forget friends. Yarr.

Pfft... What kind of a Pirate needs to buy votes? I'm selling positions, like any good pirate should. The only money I'm giving up is for the death of Monty over there, who sounds more like some kind of Dredded Judge than a pirate. Payment for murder is honest pirate work. Payment for votes is politician work. Who in the hells wants to vote for a politician​?

[Montmorency]

Taking 25 gold, payable in daily allotments of 4 gold, to participate in the keelhauling of Montmorency.

[El Barto]

Pfft... What kind of a Pirate needs to buy votes? I'm selling positions, like any good pirate should. The only money I'm giving up is for the death of Monty over there, who sounds more like some kind of Dredded Judge than a pirate. Payment for murder is honest pirate work. Payment for votes is politician work. Who in the hells wants to vote for a politician​?

This bain't a bad proposition. We needs three others to complete this bargain, unless ye yerself be ready to take on such a burthen and only two are needed. Ye'd be a-saving money, savvy?

[Diana Abnoba]

How much again will you be paying, TinCow for Monty's murder?

[Montmorency]

There's nothing a group of townies can't accomplish when its members work together.

Well, besides killing a godfather.

[El Barto]

How much again will you be paying, TinCow for Monty's murder?

Ah, yon lady be interested already. It bain't murder if they don't find 'is body.

There's nothing a group of townies can't accomplish when its members work together.

Well, besides killing a godfather.

Don't PISs overboard. How would ye know?

[seireikhaan]

Pfft... What kind of a Pirate needs to buy votes? I'm selling positions, like any good pirate should. The only money I'm giving up is for the death of Monty over there, who sounds more like some kind of Dredded Judge than a pirate. Payment for murder is honest pirate work. Payment for votes is politician work. Who in the hells wants to vote for a politician​?

My lord, but give the word and I shall gladly do what thee asks. I need not payment for fulfilling divine will.

[Double A]

I've always been wary of budding cults. TinCow, you cannot have my soul! Besides, it already belongs to another bovine orgah.

elect: Monty

[seireikhaan]

Official tally, as ordained by the humble acolyte of his divine benefactor.


TinCow, The Grand Adjudicator, Arbiter of Souls 8 (issaikhaan, Himself, Arjos, Askthepizzaguy, Chaotix, Johnhughtom, Ishmael, Xenoneb)
Zaccino 4 (Bsmith, Zaccino, Choxorn, Diana Abnoba)
Monty 2 (Double A, ACIN)
Arjos 1 (Montmorency)
Jolt 1 (Visorslash)

[NinjaCow64]

I've always been wary of budding cults. TinCow, you cannot have my soul! Besides, it already belongs to another bovine orgah.

elect: Monty

Arr, tha' ain't so you mad seee dog. Yer war one o' them lads tha' participated in dar cult o' three. It is known, arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

Vote: Zaccino as I want some booty, o' both kinds. Zack ith dar only one o' you lads who promised any gold, an' I want som. Arrrrrrrrrrrrrr! Pass da rum!!!!!!!!!!

[NinjaCow64]

Arr, I be havin' tooeh much rum arready, tha' shald beh Elect: Zaccino

ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!

[Diana Abnoba]

Just a bit over the top issaikhaan the brown noser.

[Askthepizzaguy]

I'd like to remind everyone that due to my recruiting prowess, I have by far the most money in the game. Zaccino doesn't forget friends. Yarr.

Yarr. This one be braggin that he got more gold than the lot of ye.

Not a wise thing fer a pirate to do.

[edse]

Elect: Tincow

Yar?

[Double A]

Arr, tha' ain't so you mad seee dog. Yer war one o' them lads tha' participated in dar cult o' three. It is known, arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

Vote: Zaccino as I want some booty, o' both kinds. Zack ith dar only one o' you lads who promised any gold, an' I want som. Arrrrrrrrrrrrrr! Pass da rum!!!!!!!!!!

Yarrr, leave me ma outta dis or I'll gut ye like a handgrenadefish.

unelect Monty, elect: Zaccino due ta better chances.

[Andres]

Yar!

Hello there, mateys!

I am proud to present myself as your new captain. Contrary to the boring metallic bovine, I can promise you ENTERTAINING EXECUTIONS! And three WENCHES for everybody for the entire journey. And barrels of rum!

Elect : Andres

[JoanK]

I say Elect: Zaccino. Me wantz da mooniez.

[Askthepizzaguy]

Yar!

Hello there, mateys!

I am proud to present myself as your new captain. Contrary to the boring metallic bovine, I can promise you ENTERTAINING EXECUTIONS! And three WENCHES for everybody for the entire journey. And barrels of rum!

Elect : Andres

Wenches on board a ship? This landlubber seems unaware that the ladies are bad luck on a voyage.


Naw, it's me manly shipmates and a gallon of rum for me. So what if their beards tickle my skin at night. So sensuous.

[Andres]

Wenches on board a ship? This landlubber seems unaware that the ladies are bad luck on a voyage.


Naw, it's me manly shipmates and a gallon of rum for me. So what if their beards tickle my skin at night. So sensuous.

It seems like the savage Askthepizzaguy isn't aware of the concept luxury cruise.

That's right, comrades, I offer you luxury! No more having to sit near a stinking ATPG who smells like a combination of old garlic, rotten tomatoes and questionable pepperoni and sausages! I offer you luxury cabines! For each man his own sauna, his jacuzzi, 10 showers and 5 seperate bathrooms for his wenches and a cell to lock up his wenches in case he wants to enjoy rest and piece! This entire ship will be turned into a giant paradise of luxury and pleasure and everything a modern pirate of refined tastes requires! And entertaining executions that will even be entertaining and fun for the lad walking the plank!

Elect Andres and you'll enjoy a trip like you've never had before!

Champagne, beer and RUM!

[Askthepizzaguy]

For each man his own sauna, his jacuzzi, 10 showers and 5 seperate bathrooms

Only one man in each sauna? YARRR THAT SOUNDS LONELY

Elect Tincow, and I promise you all that you'll each have a turn washing me back!


I wouldn't lie about that sort of thing. Come on now, who wants to soap me up first?

[Andres]

Only one man in each sauna? YARRR THAT SOUNDS LONELY

Elect Tincow, and I promise you all that you'll each have a turn washing me back!


I wouldn't lie about that sort of thing. Come on now, who wants to soap me up first?

TinCow will probably just take all your gold, then he'll use it to buy the entire ship minus 10 square meters, turn it into a luxury resort where he'll reside (secretly together with 10 gorgeous looking wenches which he won't share). The rest of us will have to live on the remaining 10 square meters which will be, coincidentally and highly unfortunately, situated just outside the ship. He'll blame that on the guy who did the measurements.