Capo di Tutti Capi IV [Concluded]

[edse]

Final tally ( ):

Sturmhauke (11): Sigurd, Autolycus, Neri, gnarlycharlie, Xehh II, scottishranger, hero di classico, Ironside, Double A, Seon, Sprig
The Stranger (11): Backwards Logic, White_Eyes:D, Jarema, BSmith, gibsonsg91921, Erebus, Chaotix, Renata, Tiaexz, Krill, Kennigit

Secura (1): Oh! TheLastDays!
Renata (1): B_Ray
ATPG (1): Believer
Sigurd (1): Sturmhauke

Abstain: LazyMcCrow, SisterCoyote, Death is yonder, Niklas

Why bother? you won't get them both lynched anyway...

[Askthepizzaguy]

This writeup was done in the last hour I had free before work today.

I was under time pressure, but I still gave 100%. I hope it meets with your approval.

[Jarema]

writeup? what writeup? I did not see anything

[Askthepizzaguy]

writeup? what writeup? I did not see anything

Well Jarema, I did it but the hosts have to post it. See, I don't know for absolute certain if, say, a lawyer got involved and stopped the lynch for whatever reason, and therefore I can't post the official results myself.

Uh that's the host's task. So we're waiting on that.

[GeneralHankerchief]

Whoops, that took a bit longer than expected.

Doing host things now.

[GeneralHankerchief]

Note: I'm not really in a condition right now to go back and double-check the tally, so we'll be assuming Niklas's count is accurate. If anyone spots an error... let us know quickly.

[GeneralHankerchief]

Please send orders to issaikhaan ONLY. Do not send them to GH.

"This is the excellent foppery of the world, that,
when we are sick in fortune,--often the surfeit
of our own behavior,--we make guilty of our
disasters the sun, the moon, and the stars: as
if we were villains by necessity; fools by
heavenly compulsion; knaves, thieves, and
treachers, by spherical predominance; drunkards,
liars, and adulterers, by an enforced obedience of
planetary influence; and all that we are evil in,
by a divine thrusting on: an admirable evasion
of whoremaster man, to lay his goatish
disposition to the charge of a star!"
...King Lear 1.2
...William Shakespeare


9:13PM, Saturday, 11 November 1951
The Executive Meeting Room (Small Ballroom)
Fatlington Convention Center
Fatlington, New Jersey



The Director was late, arriving today exactly one hour before the deadline, having been completely exhausted by non-Director related activities. He conferred with this friends regarding the method of death, and for a moment, he was completely stumped. Panic began to set in.... and he noticed that the votes for the lynch seemed to be headed for a tie. He needed something, something big to prove he was still worthy of being Director.

The minutes ticked by, and he had plans that night... he couldn't afford a delay or extension. He needed a show-stopper, and he needed it now. Various ideas were tossed about, but the Director, being picky, shot them all down. Then, there was a discussion about whether or not someone could be dealt enough drugs to hallucinate they were being eaten alive by a turducken. That was the final straw... Santino needed to take matters into his own hands. Finally, inspiration struck.

When the Director heard the names being called out, he sprang into action, making several phone calls to his friends down by the port. There were warehouses full of items they could use. So the trucks were loaded in record time, and sent down to the convention center, where the Director's goons set to unloading them.

"Gentlemen" began Askthepizzaguy, "I give you the most elaborate, fantastic death ever! It will be like nothing you've ever seen before! You will begin constructing the stage that I have designed."

The Director handed out several blueprints to his goons, the committee members, and even the condemned. They set to work, with only 45 minutes left to go. In a very short time, there were several platforms, each with oddities and horrors more frightening than the last. There were bars around the outside of the platforms, preventing escape for anyone trapped inside.... except by moving to the next platform as quickly as possible.

There were locked doors and hidden keys, pits filled with live scorpions, starving monkeys, complex spiked booby traps, and gangsters wielding all manner of weaponry. There were electrified floors with tiles that needed to be stepped on in the correct sequence to avoid being shocked. There was a rope ladder leading up the side of a building which was soaked in gasoline and would be lit on fire as soon as someone began climbing it, leading to the roof, where a massive aviary had been constructed, containing "attack pigeons" as the Director called them. In order to cross this area safely, they had jump into a pool of honey, then climb out and jump in a vat of birdseed, and then climb out and run as fast as they could to the other side, where they would be able to ride a water slide all the way down to the bottom, which led to a massive drainage canal filled with alligators. From there, they would float off into the river, to relative safety.

The Director checked his watch, and noticed that there was only fifteen minutes left. There just wasn't enough time! He ordered them to work faster, harder than ever. And soon, the magnificent arena was complete. Askthepizzaguy nodded with approval. It was truly a work of art.

The names were called, and Sturmhauke and The Stranger approached, looking at the various gruesome deaths that were in store for them. It was just too much.

"No, I can't do it, Askthepizzaguy. I just can't. I want something more dignified. Please... do something else..." said Sturmhauke.

The Director sighed, and offered his hand. In it were the familiar blue and red pills. "If you take the red pill" the Director began....

Before he could continue, Sturmhauke snatched the pills out of his hand and quickly ate them both.

"HOW ABOUT THAT, Pizza guy? Bet you didn't see that coming. You gave me a choice between blue and red, and I picked both! Now you have no idea what's going to happen! You can't predict the future. There is no fate, pizza man, only choice, don't you see? I've chosen something you couldn't possibly plan for, and now your creepy fate talk is all worthless. Hahahahaaha!!!"

"You really shouldn't have done that..." said Askthepizzaguy.

The ground began to shake. The pavement started cracking, and a loud, demonic roar was heard off in the distance.

"You can't mix those pills, the effects are rather extreme" he continued.

"You don't frighten me, pizza. I know it's all an illusion." said Sturmhauke.

"No.... no, you don't understand. This is as real as your so-called life gets..." The Director ordered his goons and everyone else he could fit into his limousine, and they peeled off in an instant, leaving Sturmhauke and The Stranger behind, puzzled.

The ground shook, as loud, thunderous booms were heard getting closer, and closer.... and closer....


"It's not real, Sturmhauke.... it's not real!" said The Stranger.


But there it was.... it stood 80 feet tall. It was monstrous, and bloated, and making a terrible screeching noise that sounded like three different voices at once. It was a crime against nature, an affront to God himself. It was a being that should not be, it was unnatural.... it was wrong.


"It isn't real." Sturmhauke said to himself, believing it less and less each time.


The gargantuan creature knocked over buildings as it approached, and Sturmhauke stood frozen, trying to convince himself that it was all just an illusion. But the police car that was crushed under the monster's feet, and the subsequent siren, led Sturmhauke to conclude that somehow.... this thing was real. He could see its powerful beak about to swallow him whole, and finally he bolted.

He ran as fast as he could, determined not to be eaten by the massive turducken. He ducked and weaved around the gigantic arena of death that Pizzaguy had constructed, not being silly enough to actually go inside it, and dove into the drainage ditch, hoping that he could make it to the river safely.


Oblivious to what Sturmhauke was seeing, the Director, The Stranger, and the others watched in puzzled amusement as he screamed "NO MISTER TURDUCKEN, DON'T EAT ME!!!" and dove head-first into the alligator-infested water, where he was promptly eaten alive.

"What's a turducken?" said one of Askthepizzaguy's associates.

"I have no idea, but it sure makes me hungry. Anyone want to join me at the all-you-can-eat buffet around the corner? My treat." said Askthepizzaguy. The arena of death would be there tomorrow...

"Meeting adjourned!" said the Director.

The giant Turducken, however, said nothing.

________________

There were shouts of approval, and the entire committee (minus the dearly departed) went off to enjoy a fabulous feast befitting this time of year. They all piled into the limo, starting with The Stranger. They kept coming in, and it became a tight squeeze. There wasn't quite enough room for all of them.

"Somebody has to get out" said the Director, as they zoomed down the street at 70 miles per hour.

Everyone looked at The Stranger, who silently cursed to himself. Askthepizzaguy rolled down the window, and The Stranger was pulled kicking and screaming toward it, and was shoved headfirst out the window. Unfortunately the driver was passing a bit too close to a street lamp at the time, and The Stranger's body became less acquainted with his head. The body was pushed out the rest of the way.

The rest of the committee had a lovely evening, though.


OOC

Night Fifteen orders are due:


Please send orders to issaikhaan ONLY. Do not send them to GH.

Lynch vote tally:

Sturmhauke (11): Sigurd, Autolycus, Neri, gnarlycharlie, Xehh II, scottishranger, hero di classico, Ironside, Double A, Seon, Sprig
The Stranger (11): Backwards Logic, White_Eyes:D, Jarema, BSmith, gibsonsg91921, Erebus, Chaotix, Renata, Tiaexz, Krill, Kennigit

Secura (1): Oh! TheLastDays!
Renata (1): B_Ray
ATPG (1): Believer
Sigurd (1): Sturmhauke

Abstain: LazyMcCrow, SisterCoyote, Death is yonder, Niklas

[Askthepizzaguy]

This is your Director with a public service announcement:

Please do not mix medication without first consulting your doctor.

[White_eyes:D]

But you still enjoyed that didn't you?

[The Stranger]

pizza, i name you betrayer, and if not now you will suffer the consequences one day. twice you broke your word and twice i shall stab you.

Daveshack is most likely the lawyer, Autolycus is the big unknown and if you want to kill pizza, kill diana.

[Visor]

Boo friggin hoo. You were betrayed. Suck it up princess.

[Askthepizzaguy]

pizza, i name you betrayer, and if not now you will suffer the consequences one day. twice you broke your word and twice i shall stab you.

Yes, good.... you hear the cry of the warrior, calling you to battle and to glory.

You shall have your revenge one day.

But not today.

[sturmhauke]

As my last wish, I request that someone kill Sigurd. Oh and if all the mafia could die, that'd be great too.

[seireikhaan]

No more orders being taken. Please allow awhile for processing.

[seireikhaan]

"In 666 there lives a Mister Miller
He's our local vicar and a serial killer
Ohhhh if you find the time please come and stay a while
In my beautiful neighbourhood, my neighbourhood
My, my, my beautiful neighbourhood, my neighbourhood
My, my, my beautiful neighbourhood
Who lives in a house like this?
Who lives in a house like this?
They want to knock us down cause they think we're scum
But we will all be waiting when the bulldozers come
In a neighbourhood like this you know it's hard to survive
So you'd better come prepared cause they won't take us alive"
...Neighbourhood
...Space


Fifteenth Night -- The Streets of Fatlington


For Erebus, it was a long night’s walk. He departed the council in a bit of a hurry, wanting to get home quick to avoid getting caught in any mob war crossfire. But it seemed that someone had their sights set on him. He was striding across an empty street when a lone man emerged from the shadows, standing in his path. A knife gleamed in the darkness. Cautiously, Erebus started to saunter to his left, down the other street. The man started to pick up his pace to follow. But he kept a slow pace, seeming content to follow. When Erebus hit the cross-section, the man stood upright, and waited. And waited… and waited… When Erebus was well off in the distance, it finally occurred to the man that whatever grand strategy he had planned was not going to come to fruition.


Gibsons stared back at the odd man before him. He was lurking at one of Fatlington’s seedier bars tonight, hoping to lay low. But an irate poker player has marched over and started accusing him of signaling the man’s opponents. Gibsons merely inched backwards on his seat, trying to get some space. “Look, I don’t know anyone here. I’m just t trying to enjoy my night. Now… if you’d kindly go back to your game, I’m sure you could enjoy yours a bit more too, right?”

“Oh, this is more than just poker, bud. There’s a whole lot more, I think you’ll find.” The man pulled a hidden knife from his coat, and swung his arm in an arc, bringing the knife with full force right at Gibsons’ exposed face. Gibsons winced, recoiling backwards, waiting for the sweet kiss of death.

“Now now… , what’s this? No need to get this poor guy involved, right?” Gibsons opened his eyes, and saw the other three card players behind the enraged man, one holding the man’s arm and twisting it backwards. The one holding the arm nodded to Gibsons. “Now, why don’t you move on, fella?” Not needing to be told twice, Gibsons picked himself up, and bolted from the tavern without a second thought.


Renata was strolling leisurely down her home street. She was pretty close to home, and it had been a quiet night over. She hadn’t heard the usual echo of gunshots or vehicles skidding. She pulled up to her porch, sighing. The quiet seemed almost unbecoming of Fatlington. But she couldn’t quite contain a grin when she heard the click of a shifting gun barrel behind her. She turned slowly, hands raised. “So, that’s how it is? Just coming for me? Is that why it’s been so quiet?”

Two men in trench coats stood a few feet before her. One in the back was flipping a silver coin to apparently pass the time to himself. The other held a pistol to her at point blank range. “Can’t speak for the rest of the mobs, but yeah… we’re coming for you. And it’s time to-“ the man’s words were interrupted when a shot rang out in the night, and the pistol went flying out of the man’s hands. He cursed, a small spatter of blood going flying. The two immediately began to fall back, heads swiveling to find the gunner. In the dark of night, they couldn’t see anything. A second shot rang out, piercing through the gunmen’s fedora and blowing it off his head. He felt the breeze of the bullet blow past his hair. Still baffled, the two panicked, and immediately scampered into the shadows.


Kennigit was just hoping for a relatively stress-free night. His walk home had been quiet. The streets seemed so much quieter than previous. He had to admit to himself, in spite of tempting fate, that it seemed hopeful he could get his wish. He found himself at a crosswalk. He peered left, then right. Back, then forward. He couldn’t see anything. Didn’t hear anything. Breathing a sigh of relief, he trotted out from the sidewalk. Not three steps out, a man emerged from the shadows, wearing a smart suit and fedora. Kennigit froze on the spot. How’d he miss him?

“There you are. Sorry, no time for pleasantries, but you need to die. It is time for me to reclaim my honor!” The man leaped at Kennigit, pulling a butcher knife from inside the coat. Kennigit managed to unfreeze himself enough to stumble backwards, away from the first strike. But he tripped over his own heels. The man stood over him, a maniacal grin on his face as he raised the knife, ready for the final blow. But for a moment, his face froze up. Three more figures were approaching from down the street, each dressed in identical pinstriped suits and Baretta handgun. Now wait a minute, he missed them too?

“I think your welcome is outstayed,” the center gunmen drawled. “Think you should be on your way now, before you make a decision you’ll regret. Now, don’t that seem wise?” The knife wielding man growled for a moment, before admitting defeat and scampering away down the other direction. Kennigit sighed. At least it was all over…

Well, at least for the moment. As soon as he picked himself up, he could hear a rumbling down the street. A vehicle could be heard, but not seen, coming from the direction the maniac had departed. The three gunners readied their attention, and raised their firearms in the direction. The rumbling grew louder. Finally, a black car, with the headlights off, came into sight at the last second, and screeched to a halt. Both passenger and driver door opened, a shadowed figure emerging from each. A tommy gun could be seen in their hands. But neither had time to do much, as they found themselves under a barrage of Barettas. Each figure ducked back into the car, which immediately came to life. The headlights came on at last, temporarily blinding the four folks in the street, giving the car the perfect opportunity to escape.


09:07AM, Sunday, 13 November 1951
The Executive Meeting Room (Small Ballroom)
Fatlington Convention Center
Fatlington, New Jersey


"So.... yeah. That was it. Honestly." Commissioner Fermanagh sorted back through his notes to double check. "Anyways. For your postmortem results. We found that your lynch choice, Crazed Rabbit, was a made man in one of the mafia families. Not a high ranking person, but still a crucial element of their efforts. Meanwhile, for those who fell in the night. Like the Rabbit, Lewwyn was made mafioso. Unfortunately, both Monk and Yaropolk were fairly innocent townspeople, in spite of their lackadasical approaches to mob hunting."

The Commissioner sorted his notes back into a single pile, then picked up the gavel.

"Alright, folks. We had a pretty successful night. Now, let's try and carry that over to the lynch. Let's keep up the momentum and drive them all out!" With his bit finished, the Commissioner handed things over to Director Askthepizzaguy to kick the day's events off.


OOC

Day Sixteen begins. You are voting to lynch.

Phase ends:

Scan results will be out in a few minutes. Kill/protect results will probably wait until morning, eg about 6 hours or so. As always, PM me if you are expecting a promotion.

Please continue to vote. Sending night orders alone will not be enough to save you from the WOG.Attacked = 56: Askthepizzaguy (n1, n2, n4, n5, n8), Raskolnikov (n1), Slash and earn (n1, n6), slysnake (n1, n3), Earthling (n1), a completely inoffensive name (n2), Master Necromanver (n2), Cahoma (n2), El Barto (n2), Montmorency (n2, n4), Chaotix (n2, n3, n11, n12), taillesskangaru (n3), Secura (n3), Ameranth (n3), Craterus (n3), Cecil XIX (n3, n6), johnhughthom (n4), Ishmael (n4), Drunk Clown (n4, n5), Psychonaut (n5), Suburban Plankton (n4), Sasaki Kojiro (n4), scottishranger (n4, n10), edse (n5), Erebus (n5, n6), Diana Abnoba (n6, n10), J.D. (n6), Zack (n6), Camikaze (n7), Hero di Classico (n7), Diamondeye (n7, n9), guiri (n8), Khazaar (n8, n9, n11), Riedquat (n8), robbiecon (n8), Scienter (n8 x2), sturmhauke (n8), Jarema (n9), Oh! TheLastDays! (n10), qlyphz (n10, n12), Psychonaut (n11), Crazed Rabbit (n12), Erebus (n12), BillMC (n12), Secura (n13), Beefy (n13), white eyes (n13), B_Ray (n14), Renata (n14), Tiaexz (n14)

Wounded = 21: Slysnake (n1, n3), Lord Brennus (n3), Tratorix (n4), edse (n5), Erebus (n6), Psychonaut (n6), Choxorn (n7), dcmort93 (n7), Zack (n7), guiri (n8), Monk (n8), Sasaki (n9), Lewwyn (N11), Neri (N11), Scottishranger (n13), Sturmhauke (n13), BillMC (n14), The Stranger (n14), Winston Hughes (n14)

Killed = 59: Captain Black Adder [townie] (n1), Pharoah [townie] (n2), Moros [luca] (n2), ELITEWARMAN8GINGYBREADMENMILK [townie] (n2), TinCow [detective] (n3), Xenoneb [townie] (n3), El Barto [detective] (n3), Arjos [FBI chief] (n3), Ameranth [wiseguy] (n4), Lord Winter [wiseguy] (n4), Suburban Plankton [detective] (n5), slysnake [townie] (n5), Lord Brennus [townie] (n5), Bow-wow-wow [townie] (n5), ByzantineKnight [townie] (n6), Kagemusha [serial killer] (n6), Tratorix [FBI] (n6), Raskolnikov [wiseguy] (n6), Nictel [wiseguy] (n6), J.D. [wiseguy] (n6), Visorslash [communist leader] (n7), Cecil XIX [townie] (n7), Drunk Clown [luca] (n7), Johnhughthom [wiseguy] (n7), Jolt [Made] (n7), Romanic [wiseguy] (n7), fubbleskag [doctor] (n8), Ibn-Khaldun [townie] (n8), Memnon [townie] (n8), robbiecon [townie] (n8), Andres [Special Agent] (n8), Camikaze [Made] (n8), Frozen in Ice [wiseguy] (n8), woad&fangs [townie] (n9), Zack [townie] (n9), Zim [Luca] (n9), Choxorn [townie] (n9), dcmort93 [townie] (n9), Diamondeye [wiseguy] (n10),
AggonyKing [townie] (n10), God Emperor [made] (n10), Skotsko [made] (n10), slash and earn [townie] (n10), thefluffyone93 [rogue detective] (n10), Craterus [townie] (n11), Peasant Phill [Don] (n11), Sasaki [Don] (n11), ULC [townie] (n11), Khazaar [townie] (n12), Johhog [Wiseguy] (n12), qlyphz [townie] (n12), Lewwyn [made] (n13), Monk [townie] (n13), Yaropolk [townie] (n13), Cahoma (n14), guiri (n14), Psychonaut (n14), Scienter (n14)


Lynched = 13: Earthling [townie] (d2), a completely inoffensive name [townie] (d3), Subotan [wiseguy] (d3), Major Robert Dump [wiseguy] (d4), Ishmael [communist] (d5), Montmorency [wiseguy] (d6), landlubber [Made] (d8), Captain Blackadder [townie] (d9), Riedquat [townie] (d10), Edse [surgeon] (d11), Populus Romanus [surgeon] (d12), Crazed Rabbit [made] (d13), Sturmhauke (d15), The Stranger (d15)

Wogged = 4: bestrfcplayer (n6), cpdwane [townie] (n4), Master Necromanver [Don] (n4), taillesskangaru [townie] (n4)

Added: Autolycus (d4)

Active:

Askthepizzaguy, Autolycus, B Ray, Backwards Logic, Beefy187, Believer, Beskar, BillMc, BSmith, Chaotix, Clitsome, DaveShack, Death is yonder, Diana Abnoba, Double A, Erebus, fyremarble, GamezRule, gibsonsg91921, gnarleycharlie, hero di classic, Ironside, Jarema, kennigit, Khazaar, Krill, LazyMcCrow, Neri, Nightbringer, Niklas, O!TheLastDays!, Renata, scottishranger, Secura, Seon, shlin28, Sigurd, Silver Jan, SisterCoyote, Sprig, White_eyes:D, Winston Hughes, Xehh II

[Populus Romanus]

LOLZ.

Not a single murder. Do realize how good that feels? How relieving it is to know that you are safe?

Give peace a chance.

[Montmorency]

Wow. I didn't think town could still organize PT groups.

[Ishmael]

Who said it was the town?

[Populus Romanus]

I do not think even the communists realize the full defensive capablilites of the town. Like the many cells of a terrorist organization, they lie in wait, hiding in the shadows, their numbers and names unknown even to each other, having only one thing in common: the desire to kill.

[Montmorency]

Eye of the Townie?

[classical_hero]

What an uneventful night. I was expecting more action than that.

[Xehh II]

Very disappointing

[Erebus]

Should have picked a better target then me. That's what, six attacks now.

[Askthepizzaguy]

Congratulations.

In case my Stracchi friends are wondering, yes.... I had something to do with that. You see, I can't *really* rely on doctors to protect all of you. Firstly, there aren't enough. Certainly not enough to do so and also cover the Cunio and other allies of mine. Which means you all were in grave danger last night. When the Corleone approached me with a peace offer, I took it; but I required them to commit their entire force to the cause of defense. They wouldn't have a chance to get you. Also, in case you were wondering, I consulted at least one member of the Stracchi for this move; I didn't keep yall in the dark. My objective was a success; you and all the allies are still alive.

Now..... the time has come for the enemies of the mafia to be put to a slow demise.






If you need a suggestion: How about the elusive Erebus and BillMc..... give me a tie. Let's put them both through the arena of death.

And also, it would be GREAT if we got an updated list of "alive" Players, it's getting confusing, o mighty game hosts.

[Askthepizzaguy]

Not a single murder. Do realize how good that feels? How relieving it is to know that you are safe?

Safe? Oh no, my young friend. I am afraid you are gravely mistaken. That was the worst possible outcome for the townies.... not a single mafioso died.

Now you will witness the final destruction of the town, and the end of your insignificant rebellion.

[Diana Abnoba]

Vote: Erebus

[LazyMcCrow]

vote: BillMc

[Ironside]

So are those knife kill attempts failed mafia moves or a resurfacing serial killer?

Interested parties (namely me) wants to know. It's helpful for tracking the killer down.

Now a confession for the murders of Visorslash and Frozen in Ice would be even better.

I suppose that's too much to ask for, but you could always ask.

[Askthepizzaguy]

2400 Plaza del Universo
Radio City building, Suite 501
Fatlington, New Jersey

No matter what, I got your back
I'll take a bullet for you if it comes to that
I swear to God that in the bitter end
We're gonna be the last ones standing

So believe me when I say, you're the one
They'll never forgive us for the things we've done
And we will make it out alive
I'll promise you this love will never die!

The Anachronism hour with DJ Saucy Slice

"Hello Fatlington, this is DJ Slice.

The song you just heard was "No Matter What" by Papa Roach. It's a reminder to all about the importance of cooperation, and the promises we've made to each other, to watch each others' back. What could have been a bloody and costly war between Made Gangsters should have been averted.

Such a war would have crippled Fatlington. The feud was too evenly matched, and in spite of my best efforts, too many friends would have been lost in the struggle, and in the end we would have been at the mercy of..... *shudder* do-gooders.

Not to worry. We will still have our honorable battle, a contest between champions. But in the end, there will still be mob rule in this city. I guarantee it."

[LazyMcCrow]

Mmmmmm -mmmm!
That was some a cheesy meat ball!